So my friend Laura told me that she wanted to go to The Women's Ultimate Expo in SF - with Helen Hunt as one of the keynote speakers. Sounded good, I suppose. "Have fun, Laura!"
Well, she came to me the next day and told me that she got two tickets because it was buy two for the price of one, and that I can go with her.
Lemme tellya, as soon as I got into the front of the place, I knew exactly what was going to go on in there. Just walking in, the smell of a strong mixture of fragrances hit me and immediately my allergies kicked in.
Looking around, I noticed that there was a HUGE sign telling people about the beauty seminars upstairs. There were booze sample booths all lined up on one side, and that area was crowded as if it were a slapchop demo. To the left the line for the women's bathroom was as bad as if this were a rock concert with an extended set.
550 booths. Make up, perfume, wigs, hair products, stiletto heels, figure enhancing undergarments, lotions, soaps, powders, things that make you stand up taller, things to make your teeth whiter, or your teeth straighter, things that make your shoulders go back so your bosom sticks out more, miracle skin tightening, things you ingest to clean out your colon so you don't have the tummy bulge. Plastic surgery.
Oh and of course jewelry, purses, accents for clothing such as dingle doo haws to hang on your phone to make it cuter.
Attending without make up such as I did was a curse. Walking though there, so many people were offering me this, a sample of that, Let me show you this, have a spritz of this, "Come, I'll make you look BEEEYOOTEEFUL!"
Sales sales sales. All designed to plant in your mind how ugly you are to be you.
Plastic women all around me with cakes of make up, breast enhancements and fake smiles having the hardest time walking in those ankle breaking high heels.
Five hours in Barbies world. Enough is enough. I had to leave. I didn't even get to hear Helen Hunt speak.
No wonder my headache wont' go away.