It's been little over a year since my messy divorce was finally signed by the judge. After 16 years of pure hell, 10 months of legal battle while still living with the enemy, I was finally set free and moved out.
The last 14.5 months of peace have been so strange. Granted, there's always some drama @ kids exchange and stuff, but is minimal in comparison to living with drama 24 x 7. I had forgotten how peace felt like. Not only because the last relationship was hell, but the one before that, and before that, and before that, and before that...
The last 10.5 months, with new Girlfriend and all, have been even better. It is on this part of the story where I have to admit I was wrong, love does exist and not all women are evil.
One curious and unexpected aspect of this whole thing, something I never expected, something nobody told me about: I'm remembering things.... all kinds of things. Bad stuff the ex did or said, good friends that I had forgotten about, hobbies I used to like, all sorts of stuff... important stuff... things I have no idea why I forgot in the first place or why I didn't acted upon and choose to ignore.
I wonder if maybe the hell I was going trough was so painful that I could not see past the problems. Or on other cases, its like I didn't wanted to see, like I forgot stuff on purpose, trying to believe the lies. And now, little by little, the veils are being lifted, the memories are coming back.
One very pleasant memory is from 1992. While living with 1st wife on a section 8 project, wifey was baby sitting a group of 5 or 6 kids. They all got bikes for Christmas but they didn't knew how to ride them. I had an MTB at the time and was riding daily, when these kids asked me to teach them how to ride. Their daddies had bailed, their mommies worked till late and I just could not say no... there was nobody else. I ended up taking all these kids to the local park every other afternoon, to ride bikes. They called me uncle Rube' and followed me in single line like little ducklings. I remember taking them to the nearby ice cream shop every time of them graduated off the training wheels. God I like them kids so much. I could not wait to have my own.
Some how, I forgot all about that part of my life. Even when I started training my own kids, couple of years ago, I didn't remember anything about my little cycling club in the early 90's.
It might remain a mystery why all these memories faded for so many years, or why they are coming back now. But I'm sure I'm glad they are coming back, after the storm.