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Old 12-02-04, 03:14 PM   #1
live311
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Holiday depression. Am I the only one?

For some reason this time of year really bums me out. This is the only time of year my boring bachelor lifestyle actually bothers me. I have a loving family and plenty of things going for me, but right around Thanksgiving (which is around the same time as my birthday), it's like flipping a switch and I get all bummed out over the little things. Maybe it's because I can't ride my bike in this crappy weather. Maybe it's because I haven't gotten laid in 2 years. Maybe I'm starting to feel old. Maybe I'm just lonely or suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder. It's made me pathetic enough to post about it on message boards for sympathy so I don't feel so alone. Sorry. But thanks for reading, anyway.

EDIT: Trust me. I know how to spell depression. It was a typo.
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Old 12-02-04, 03:20 PM   #2
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I get depressed this time of year too, but I think it's more because that's it gets dark so early. I'm eagerly awaiting the day when the days start getting longer again!
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Old 12-02-04, 03:25 PM   #3
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you are not alone on this one. This is a very
stressful time of year with all the family events
and the issues that they bring up. Add to that
the shorter days, SAD (and it is real), decrease
in activities and it can add up to a really bad time for
alot of people.
Read some of the posts, there is a general crankiness and
little tolerance for things that would normally just be annoying.

If it gets bad, go talk to someone you don't have to feel this
way.

Marty
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Old 12-02-04, 03:26 PM   #4
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you're not the only one. i was single for the last 4 holiday seasons and i just wanted to be by myself. now, this year i'm in a committed relationship and i still just want to be by myself. there is this weird tug of war where i equally want to be around people and equally just want to be left alone. it's been like this since i was in middle school.
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Old 12-02-04, 04:51 PM   #5
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Seasonal Affective Disorder

Holiday Depression and Stress

Last edited by DnvrFox; 12-02-04 at 05:04 PM.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:07 PM   #6
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People, people, people....

This is why god invented alcohol and loose women. The holidays are not time to be depressed, they're a time for living with glutonous abandon. Just look at that fat **** Santa Claus, he sure didnt get that way by NOT drinking himself into a stupor and eating whichever random pork products came his way. Get drunk, get laid, vomit on your grandparents and get a DUI. These are stories you will need later on in life to let a girl you actually like know how much you've "changed" when she calls you 'a pathetic idiot who cant even hold down a decent job and support me and these five kids'
Forget all you've heard about the Christmas spirit and spreading Holiday cheer. This is about having a good time, dammit. And you're not going to have a good time when you're depressed. And the best way to get undepressed is to get good and smashed, and hit on random women.
Here's a tip. If at the end of the night, you still havent found one to bring home, look for the one drinking out of the bottle with cigarette butts floating in it. You're a shoe-in.
What's all this Holiday depression, anxiety syndrome crap? Forget all that. You control your emotions, and you either tell yourself to cheer up, or you use chemicals to do it for you. Does shopping cheer you up? Good, just spend all your christmas money on yourself then, that way you'll get DOUBLE the presents, cause your family wont know you did it, and they'll get you gifts too. Come on! Cheer the hell up already. Its Christmas.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:19 PM   #7
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Thanks, Burly. That got a chuckle out of me. I'll give your mom a call this weekend

And I'm not a useless slug over the winter. I've been hitting the gym 5 times a week. And even when I was in a relationship, I still got like this. I need a new hobby to keep me busy. That's what cured it last year. Thanks for your input, guys. It's nice to know I'm not really alone.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:20 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BurlySurly
People, people, people....

This is why god invented alcohol and loose women. The holidays are not time to be depressed, they're a time for living with glutonous abandon. Just look at that fat **** Santa Claus, he sure didnt get that way by NOT drinking himself into a stupor and eating whichever random pork products came his way. Get drunk, get laid, vomit on your grandparents and get a DUI. These are stories you will need later on in life to let a girl you actually like know how much you've "changed" when she calls you 'a pathetic idiot who cant even hold down a decent job and support me and these five kids'
Forget all you've heard about the Christmas spirit and spreading Holiday cheer. This is about having a good time, dammit. And you're not going to have a good time when you're depressed. And the best way to get undepressed is to get good and smashed, and hit on random women.
Here's a tip. If at the end of the night, you still havent found one to bring home, look for the one drinking out of the bottle with cigarette butts floating in it. You're a shoe-in.
What's all this Holiday depression, anxiety syndrome crap? Forget all that. You control your emotions, and you either tell yourself to cheer up, or you use chemicals to do it for you. Does shopping cheer you up? Good, just spend all your christmas money on yourself then, that way you'll get DOUBLE the presents, cause your family wont know you did it, and they'll get you gifts too. Come on! Cheer the hell up already. Its Christmas.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:31 PM   #9
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If you need a family, take mine. They are all over me all times of the year, I have no privacy, and if anything, they make me glad I have time alone to stare out the freakin' windows. They are insane.

Hey, you've got your health, a job, and you've got friends. You don't need much more than that to have a better quality of life. I would say it's pretty good if you've got those three in your pocket!

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Old 12-02-04, 05:44 PM   #10
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Thank god I have a gf so I get some every day.
Maybe it's your "HEEEERE's JOHNNY! I'm gonna butcher my whole family and everyone else in the house" that's scaring away the chicks.
I find video games help a lot. You ever tried playing subspace? You fly around with like 200 other people in little space ships shooting each other. It's actually pretty social and addictive.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:46 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BurlySurly
People, people, people....

This is why god invented alcohol and loose women. The holidays are not time to be depressed, they're a time for living with glutonous abandon. Just look at that fat **** Santa Claus, he sure didnt get that way by NOT drinking himself into a stupor and eating whichever random pork products came his way. Get drunk, get laid, vomit on your grandparents and get a DUI. These are stories you will need later on in life to let a girl you actually like know how much you've "changed" when she calls you 'a pathetic idiot who cant even hold down a decent job and support me and these five kids'
Forget all you've heard about the Christmas spirit and spreading Holiday cheer. This is about having a good time, dammit. And you're not going to have a good time when you're depressed. And the best way to get undepressed is to get good and smashed, and hit on random women.
Here's a tip. If at the end of the night, you still havent found one to bring home, look for the one drinking out of the bottle with cigarette butts floating in it. You're a shoe-in.
What's all this Holiday depression, anxiety syndrome crap? Forget all that. You control your emotions, and you either tell yourself to cheer up, or you use chemicals to do it for you. Does shopping cheer you up? Good, just spend all your christmas money on yourself then, that way you'll get DOUBLE the presents, cause your family wont know you did it, and they'll get you gifts too. Come on! Cheer the hell up already. Its Christmas.
At last, Burly back to his ascerbic best.

Should make you an onorary Aussie.
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Old 12-02-04, 05:58 PM   #12
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Skiing makes winter fun. Cross-country or nordic downhill (telemark) is great cross-training for cycling and helps prevents winter blues. Think snow! Or light therapy? Vitamin D? See a doc if you get too depressed, maybe can help you. Hope you feel better soon.
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Old 12-02-04, 07:04 PM   #13
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I used to get pretty bummed about the holidays. Being alone, being poor, not being able to bike, the post office being slow as **** with my records, having to buy gifts for people I barely know, etc. This year I've got a love interest, I'm actually getting stuff for the 25th, and I sort of know what I'm buying everyone. I'll still probably go through withdrawals because of the lack of records coming in the mail, but I'm sure everything else can make up for it.

Hope you feel better!
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Old 12-03-04, 04:40 PM   #14
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One of the reasons people get depressed at this time of year is because of the expectations: we think xmas is supposed to be like those tv specials on the Hallmark hall of fame where everyone holds hands and sings Kumbaya! THere is so much pressure on us to be happy and be with our families, when most of us, lets face it- can't stand our families! Of course, I'm jewish agnostic, so that xmas pressure is not a big part of it. However, this is my first holiday in many years living alone. I'm trying to look at the good stuff- I don't have to have xmas with my inlaws!
Another thing is the lack of sun and don't get enough vitamin D. Even if you do winter sports, you don't get exposed to the sun enough. Try taking vitamin D supplements during the winter. I do; it's also good for bone density, especially here where the winters are long and the days are very short now. It gets dark at like 4pm!

Just try not to put pressure on yourself to BE HAPPY!
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Old 12-03-04, 04:58 PM   #15
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When I was a kid, my mother made Christmas the "centerpiece" for the whole year. That is when you got your school clothes for the following year, plus something "big", such as a new Schwinn. It was always such a huge production that by noon on Christmas, she was frazzled and things were coming unwound. And, then came the eleven months of paying off the credit cards.

My grandmother told me that back around 1900, the Christmas season began on Christmas Eve. A trip to church. Decorate the tree. A nice dinner. Maybe another trip to church. Christmas morning, there was some nuts and an orange in a stocking on the fireplace. And, in 1900, in Michigan, a fresh orange was a treat. Even in old age, my grandmother said the smell of an orange reminded her of being around the Christmas tree with her sister and parents.

Then came dinner with the family or friends. And the tree came down. And Christmas was over.

So, in my own "old age", I have adopted my grandmother's Christmas. I stay away from Malls. I avoid hearing "Christmas music". Finally, on Christmas Eve, I wrap a few small gifts (some purchased 363 days earlier, at the "after-Christmas sales") for delivery in the morning. A dinner with friends. And, good-bye to Christmas.

For me, the "two day" Christmas is a small, but pleasant and enjoyable event. The month-long orgy of buying and spending that Wal-Mart hopes to generate was NOT an enjoyable event.

So, for an enjoyable Christmas, wait until Christmas. New Year's Eve can also be a small, but pleasant evening. Aim low when it comes to Holidays and you will likely hit the mark.
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Old 12-03-04, 05:10 PM   #16
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And, in 1900, in Michigan, a fresh orange was a treat. Even in old age, my grandmother said the smell of an orange reminded her of being around the Christmas tree with her sister and parents.
My grandfather was born in Minnesota in 1873, along with 9 brothers and sisters. He also got an orange for Christmas - and it also was a big deal.

We have purposely greatly simplified the Christmas season. We have a few decorations which take aabout an hour to put up, do NO baking, and resist sweets from others. We have cut way back on our gifts, which my wife orders from a catalog for only those people who "need" gifts and our two sons!

Many years ago, my wife was doing the then traditional baking, etc., and, tired and irritated, yelled at our two sons, "Don't you know this is Jesus' birthday."

That was when we all realized that we needed to change our "traditions" and our new tradition is to not have traditions!

However, we are hosting a very simple open house tomorrow for my listserv, "Parents of Adults with Disabilities - Colorado" - PAD-CO. It will be simple and fun, and everyone is bringing a low-calorie treat.

We are also having an informal Christmas Carol sing at our house - again very simple with little or no strain. We just love to sing, along with several other friends we know. We may do a hymn sing monthly.

The churches we have attended lately have not had a carol sing, except with the choir there to sing most of the songs and the audience included just a bit. I guess they don't trust the congregation to sing by itself! So, we did our own, even though we are both members of the choir! And LOTS of folks are interested.
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Old 12-03-04, 06:25 PM   #17
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Once I realised that Christmas was a commercial sham, designed to make money for multinational corporations who prey on the insecurities of the must-have material masses, and that so long as I have contact with my kids and friends *throughout* the year, it's not worth celebrating. Prior to that revelation, depression at being inadequate and unable to meet others' expectations was the order of the day.

I look forward to the holiday period now for the good riding weather, good food, good drinking and good friendship... things that really I can have other anytime. Saves a packet on credit card interest, too.
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Old 12-03-04, 08:59 PM   #18
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Once I realised that Christmas was a commercial sham, designed to make money for multinational corporations who prey on the insecurities of the must-have material masses, and that so long as I have contact with my kids and friends *throughout* the year, it's not worth celebrating. Prior to that revelation, depression at being inadequate and unable to meet others' expectations was the order of the day.
That epitomizes how I feel about all special days. Valentines day probably pissing me off more than most. X-mas a close second. Easy way to drain my pockets. Luckily I have agreements with all my friends and most of my family. Small gifts.
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Old 12-04-04, 01:17 AM   #19
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At last, Burly back to his ascerbic best.

Should make you an onorary Aussie.
You guys down there thinking of starting a new colony or something?

I wouldn't call this time of year "depressing" as such (although there are few things more depressing than a Queensland summer), more annoying than anything else. School holidays and tourists are part of the problem up here, then you have everyone else rushing around trying to meet their various "obligations", then the fact that I can't walk down the street without some moron trying to sell me something, then of course there are the family obligations and the superficial gift giving and mouthing of insincere platitudes(yeah right, where were you people when I was having problems on June 12?), although in fairness, this doesn't seem to be such a problem in my immediate family these days.

About the only "festive season" I can say I enjoyed in recent times was last year -- and I suspect that was only because I was in Tasmania and genuinely able to spend it alone.
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Old 12-04-04, 03:51 AM   #20
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June 12? June 12? Anyone know anything about June 12?

<pointless platitudes on> Sorry, was that when some jerk tried to do you away, and so sway you to ride in future in places of high traffic volume and witnesses? If so, ***** man, I was doing something else at the time and I've only just found out about it. Hope you're OK now. Catch up with us when you can so I can whip your @rse over some hill or two.
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Old 12-04-04, 03:57 AM   #21
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Catch up with us when you can so I can whip your @rse over some hill or two.
Let me know when you're ready to take on Jacob's Ladder. That is, if you want a demonstration of how it's done first!
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Old 12-04-04, 05:56 AM   #22
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What's up with the murder rate? I don't know about the rest of the country, but around this time of year Chattanooga turns into a horror movie with all the violent crime we get. Some psycho murdered his family a few days ago and tried to do some wild ritual with the bodies, and that's just this year! I remember a string of like 11 murders one year around Christmastime. Some people should smoke a lot more grass...
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Old 12-04-04, 08:53 AM   #23
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Some people get violent when depressed and desperate for attention.
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Old 12-04-04, 09:24 AM   #24
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Bi&^% & Moan... this time of year is great. See it through the eyes of children and their excitement as a starting point. Make a difference in someones life other than your own... donate your time & efforts to someone or something else and you'll feel better. Stop making everything about yourself and your needs and you'll see a change in yourself.

I know for some people it's rough and for others it's cool and socially hip to bi&^% about it but that's just noise to me. Get the *&*& away from your computer and go do something, go for a ride, rent a movie-a holiday classic like "It's a Wonderful Life" or "Deep Throat" and stop complaining.
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Old 12-06-04, 10:09 PM   #25
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Bi&^% & Moan... this time of year is great. See it through the eyes of children and their excitement as a starting point. Make a difference in someones life other than your own... donate your time & efforts to someone or something else and you'll feel better. Stop making everything about yourself and your needs and you'll see a change in yourself.

I know for some people it's rough and for others it's cool and socially hip to bi&^% about it but that's just noise to me. Get the *&*& away from your computer and go do something, go for a ride, rent a movie-a holiday classic like "It's a Wonderful Life" or "Deep Throat" and stop complaining.
Easy for you to say, Mr. I-just got-a-Bob-Brown-custom!
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