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  1. #1
    Cool Beans MangoPumpkin's Avatar
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    Worst kisses you've ever received........

    Spill
    I've got your restraining order right here. [grabs crotch] Restrain this!

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by MangoPumpkin View Post
    Spill
    My Grandma Chilcote gave the worst kisses. She smelled of cheap Kentucky Bourbon and Chesterfield non filtered cigarettes.

    Couch

  3. #3
    long time visiter Alfster's Avatar
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    From my dog after she finished eating sardine leftovers.

  4. #4
    AEO
    AEO is offline
    Senior Member AEO's Avatar
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    my cat

    after she finished licking her butt.
    Food for thought: if you aren't dead by 2050, you and your entire family will be within a few years from starvation. Now that is a cruel gift to leave for your offspring. ;)
    http://sanfrancisco.ibtimes.com/arti...ger-photos.htm

  5. #5
    Dirt Bomb sknhgy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couch View Post
    She smelled of cheap Kentucky Bourbon and Chesterfield non filtered cigarettes.

    Couch
    That would make me horney.
    more cops have been killed by donuts than guns in chicago it is a medical fact ask any doctor.

  6. #6
    Chepooka StupidlyBrave's Avatar
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    ^Those^

  7. #7
    Blasted Weeds Tude's Avatar
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    Great Aunt Geraldine - RIP - us kids used to run when we knew she was coming in as her arrival was fulllllll of kisses and SKKKKWEEEZZZZING OF THE CHEEKS. If we were lucky and missed the arrival - it was awesome - but there was nothing so UN-special than to receive double kisses and SKKKWEEZZZZZING OF THE CHEEKS (I mean it hurt!!!! It wasn't a 2 second affair - SHE HOOKED ON AND HELD!!!).

    She was the worst. Lovely woman but dammit - she hurt at times!

  8. #8
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    the worst kiss is the kiss of death. i have received it so many times now that all i can do is laugh. that's right. i laugh at the kiss of death.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  9. #9
    Cool Beans MangoPumpkin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tude View Post
    Great Aunt Geraldine - RIP - us kids used to run when we knew she was coming in as her arrival was fulllllll of kisses and SKKKKWEEEZZZZING OF THE CHEEKS. If we were lucky and missed the arrival - it was awesome - but there was nothing so UN-special than to receive double kisses and SKKKWEEZZZZZING OF THE CHEEKS (I mean it hurt!!!! It wasn't a 2 second affair - SHE HOOKED ON AND HELD!!!).

    She was the worst. Lovely woman but dammit - she hurt at times!
    I had an uncle who thought it was funny to rub his scrubbly beard against our cheeks, whilst giving us hugs.....it just about tore our skin off!
    I've got your restraining order right here. [grabs crotch] Restrain this!

  10. #10
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    Sorry, I'm still thinking about the best. Mmmm...what a weekend!
    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  11. #11
    Cool Beans MangoPumpkin's Avatar
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    I would say my worst kisses were 1) A guy thought it would be funny to try and take the gum from my mouth (why oh why?!), bit my lip and pulled like hell. 2) The second was a guy who instead of kissing me, licked my lips real quick like a lizard. *shudders*
    I've got your restraining order right here. [grabs crotch] Restrain this!

  12. #12
    Banned Indy_Rider's Avatar
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    I am not a fan of the Almond Kisses.

    But probably the worst are the ones that are melted so bad you can't get the wrapper off of them.

  13. #13
    Cool Beans MangoPumpkin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
    Sorry, I'm still thinking about the best. Mmmm...what a weekend!
    Spill
    I've got your restraining order right here. [grabs crotch] Restrain this!

  14. #14
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MangoPumpkin View Post
    Spill
    28 years ago my prom date never even kissed me goodbye. This last Memorial weekend...she more than made up for it.
    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  15. #15
    Cool Beans MangoPumpkin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sknhgy View Post
    That would make me horney.
    Ewwww

    Quote Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
    28 years ago my prom date never even kissed me goodbye. This last Memorial weekend...she more than made up for it.
    Hubba Hubba
    I've got your restraining order right here. [grabs crotch] Restrain this!

  16. #16
    Pwnerer Wordbiker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ahsposo View Post
    Ski, bike and wish I was gay.

  17. #17
    Fax Transport Specialist black_box's Avatar
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    When it was time to leave a family function my sister and I would jockey for position to be out of my cousin's reach. Cousin was shorter than me but probably twice my weight, always had bandaids on her fingers from where the cat had scratched/bit her (meanest cat ever, wonder why?) Thank god they were only kisses on the cheek. Wet and slimey, but with a scratch of shaved whiskers.

  18. #18
    on by skijor's Avatar
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    j/k

  19. #19
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    1) In college, this girl randomly stuck her tongue so far down my throat that she hit my gag reflex. She seriously thought that is how it's done.
    2) Had an amazing dream date with a girl, I went in to kiss her, and it would have felt better to kiss sandpaper. Dream was over.
    3) My then 8-month old crawled over to me when I was doing something on the floor, blindsided me, and kissed me with a completely open, drool-filled mouth. I think it was too gross to be cute.
    4) My own wife, on our second date, created some sort of suction on my tongue and I felt her pull my tongue out. That hurt for three days.
    5) My ex wife thought it would be funny to bite my tongue, and she took such a huge chunk out of it that it bled for several hours. That kinda sums up the whole relationship.

  20. #20
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Indy_Rider View Post
    I am not a fan of the Almond Kisses.

    But probably the worst are the ones that are melted so bad you can't get the wrapper off of them.
    Or the white chocolate ones. EWWWWWwwwwwwwwww. Makes me think of eating a clump of fat. Blechhh.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  21. #21
    your nightmare gal chipcom's Avatar
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    jsharr kissed my ass once...it was terrible, he even slipped it the tongue! In his defense, he thought he was kissing death...my ass gets that all the time.
    "Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey

  22. #22
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couch View Post
    My Grandma Chilcote gave the worst kisses. She smelled of cheap Kentucky Bourbon and Chesterfield non filtered cigarettes.

    Couch
    My kind of girl.

  23. #23
    Ogr8nwmypstmksnosnse pgoat's Avatar
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    Not 'received' exactly, but I once (very briefly) dated a girl who wore lots of makeup. She was one of the few girls I ever dated who wore lots of make up. After one (very brief) kissing session it took me several hours to get the taste of rouge, lipstick and other crap out of my mouth.
    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    People whose sig line does not include a jsharr quote annoy me.

  24. #24
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wordbiker View Post
    28 years ago my prom date never even kissed me goodbye. This last Memorial weekend...she more than made up for it.
    Dude.

  25. #25
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    I think I have been pretty lucky in the kissing department... unless I am the bad kisser and no-one had the heart to tell me about it or were masochists and kept coming back for more.



    As for best kisses... I get those all the time.

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