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Old 06-16-12, 10:38 AM   #1
Allen
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I'm trapped in my house

There is a political rally going on at the ballpark next door. Traffic is backed up for a mile in front of my house. There are three unfamiliar cars parked in my driveway.
I just wanted to get a burger.
If I get too hungry the cars blocking my drive are going to be introduced to my tractor and a length of chain.
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Old 06-16-12, 10:46 AM   #2
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At least there's no dead guy in your drive way that appeared overnight (happen to me, now kidding). It could take hours before authorities pick up the body and you can kiss your equity good bye.
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Old 06-16-12, 10:53 AM   #3
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At least there's no dead guy in your drive way that appeared overnight (happen to me, now kidding). It could take hours before authorities pick up the body and you can kiss your equity good bye.
Abandoned wells have many uses.
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Old 06-16-12, 11:39 AM   #4
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Go by bike?
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Old 06-16-12, 11:46 AM   #5
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That's pretty ballsy to be blocking you into your own driveway without asking.
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Old 06-16-12, 11:52 AM   #6
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It happened to me, but at least I knew why. My next door neighbor's daughter was married and they held the reception (which lasted days by the way; people from India sure know how to party) at their house. We arrived home to see a catering truck in the driveway. The guy apologized but said there was literally nowhere else to unload. He was correct.
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Old 06-16-12, 11:53 AM   #7
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That's pretty ballsy to be blocking you into your own driveway without asking.
Yeah, and the three cars in MY driveway would soon be three dismantled cars in my drive way along with a huge sign in my lawn, "Car Parts Super Sale! Any part just 1 dollar!"
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Old 06-16-12, 12:21 PM   #8
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If I get too hungry the cars blocking my drive are going to be introduced to my tractor and a length of chain.
Reminds me of an interesting legal case. A guy finds a nice parking spot for his pickup. He gets his stuff done and comes back to find people parked so close that he can't get out. He gets in the truck and rams the car ahead a few times until it moves enough, and then drives off.

He is charged with leaving the scene of an accident. He goes to court and says 'it wasn't an accident.' The judge felt he had to toss the case out.
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Old 06-16-12, 12:40 PM   #9
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Isn't there a tow truck driver who'd like to have some business?
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Old 06-16-12, 12:41 PM   #10
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People always park in my drive way since i dont have a car. Its ok with me to they leave cig buts in my drive way.
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Old 06-16-12, 12:48 PM   #11
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I just mowed my grass and made sure I covered their cars in clippings.
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Old 06-16-12, 12:50 PM   #12
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It happened to me, but at least I knew why. My next door neighbor's daughter was married and they held the reception (which lasted days by the way; people from India sure know how to party) at their house. We arrived home to see a catering truck in the driveway. The guy apologized but said there was literally nowhere else to unload. He was correct.
So did he a least give you some goodies for the privilege?
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Old 06-16-12, 01:05 PM   #13
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Actually, no. :\

We didn't get invited into the wedding either.
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Old 06-16-12, 01:25 PM   #14
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Actually, no. :\

We didn't get invited into the wedding either.
Next time, demand prima nocta.
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Old 06-16-12, 02:19 PM   #15
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I just mowed my grass and made sure I covered their cars in clippings.
Don't you have two big dogs who poop in your yard? You have to put that poop somewhere after you scoop it.
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Old 06-16-12, 02:33 PM   #16
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I'm kind of curious Allen.

What's the rally in aid of?
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Old 06-16-12, 02:51 PM   #17
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Yeah, and the three cars in MY driveway would soon be three dismantled cars in my drive way along with a huge sign in my lawn, "Car Parts Super Sale! Any part just 1 dollar!"
Too much work.
Just put an ad in Craig's List: "Free cars."
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Old 06-16-12, 03:09 PM   #18
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Actually, no. :\

We didn't get invited into the wedding either.
Not even a pile of naan and (insert your fave Indian dish HERE)??? That's pretty low.
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Old 06-16-12, 03:12 PM   #19
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Put a sign in your front yard that says "Event parking $20.00"

When the drivers return, collect your money.
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Old 06-16-12, 03:27 PM   #20
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do you have some strong acid or alkali on your farm? "accidentally" spill some of the offending cars. failing that. just drag them out the way with the tractor and set fire to them.
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Old 06-16-12, 03:30 PM   #21
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or use them for target practice?
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Old 06-16-12, 04:19 PM   #22
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do you have some strong acid or alkali on your farm? "accidentally" spill some of the offending cars. failing that. just drag them out the way with the tractor and set fire to them.
Brake fluid is pretty nasty stuff when it spills on painted surfaces also.
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Old 06-16-12, 04:38 PM   #23
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Block them in with something and charge them a fee to exit.
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Old 06-16-12, 06:29 PM   #24
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Don't you have two big dogs who poop in your yard? You have to put that poop somewhere after you scoop it.
I like the way you think!
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Old 06-16-12, 06:30 PM   #25
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Too much work.
Just put an ad in Craig's List: "Free cars."
Taking then apart is half the fun!
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You see, their morals, their code...it's a bad joke, dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. I'll show you. When the chips are down, these...These "civilized" people...they'll eat each other. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve
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