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  1. #1
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    What am I going to do with all these beans?

    In an effort to win the war on Zombies, I've purchased around 20 lbs of beans. The problem is, I don't know what soup and or dish to make with them. Let's say, I have a hankering for Pinto Beans and let's say you are all extremely intelligent people who have ideas on how and what to cook with said Pinto Beans. Let's also assume Han shot first.

    So, I'm asking you to provide a nice Pinto Bean recipe. Keep in mind I have 15 lbs of Brown Rice as well.

    El Coucho

  2. #2
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    Chilli!
    Make sure to visit jsharr after you consume most of those beans. Feed the rice to Inge.

  3. #3
    Senior Member himespau's Avatar
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    20 lbs dried? That's one hell of a lot of beans. My advice, build a pea shooter *** to ping neighbor kids when they get too close to your lawn.
    Punctuation is important. It's the difference between "I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse" and "I helped my uncle Jack off a horse"


  4. #4
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    couch powered and scented jacuzzi?
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  5. #5
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    I have a great recipe...

    1) Throw them out
    2) Go buy bacon to replace beans

  6. #6
    smorenivore colorider's Avatar
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    You might want to reconsider your choice of survival foods in case zombies can hear/smell. Just sayin'

    One does not simply ride their bike into Mordor! - electrik

  7. #7
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    couch is a yankee so he cannot even act like a cowboy.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    couch is a yankee so he cannot even act like a cowboy.
    And he is from Ohio.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    couch is a yankee so he cannot even act like a cowboy.
    Why would I want to act like a Cowboy?

    El Vaquero

  10. #10
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by charlie burgh View Post
    And he is from Ohio.
    yeah...that's north of GA....he's a yankee.

  11. #11
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couch View Post
    Why would I want to act like a Cowboy?

    El Vaquero
    texican envy.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by charlie burgh View Post
    And he is from Ohio.
    The best state ever.

    El Coucho

  13. #13
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    Modo, Charlie and jsharr. You are not helping the cause. I demand you offer up a recipe.

    El Coucho

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
    yeah...that's north of GA....he's a yankee.
    But an Ohioan Yankee is worse.

  15. #15
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couch View Post
    Modo, Charlie and jsharr. You are not helping the cause. I demand you offer up a recipe.

    El Coucho
    I did. Did you not read my suggestion? It is a great recipe and tastes yummy.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by charlie burgh View Post
    I did. Did you not read my suggestion? It is a great recipe and tastes yummy.
    \

    Your suggestion was stupid and not worthy. Bacon is bad for you.

    El Coucho

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Couch View Post
    Your suggestion was stupid and not worthy. Bacon is bad for you.
    Inge is gonna bite you.

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by charlie burgh View Post
    Inge is gonna bite you.
    No she is not. She's 13.456 miles away. Even the mighty Inge is incapable of biting me from that distance.

    El Coucho

  20. #20
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    My first suggestion is a recipe for dis ass ter
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  21. #21
    Senior Member himespau's Avatar
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    apparently, you need Inge to go catch you a whole crap-ton of moles. Then you cut off their asses and throw those mole asses in to a big dutch oven or other heavy pot with your beans (rehydrated) and a hunk of bacon (careful, this part is tricky because cops tend to get pissed off when you cut a hunk out of their sides, and they tend to be armed) and throw it in your oven on low heat for 8-12 hours. Probably oughta skin the moles before you do this or you'll get a bunch of hair in there. Oh, and if you catch the cop just after he's had his donut fix (which makes them slower and easier to catch/harvest the bacon) there might already be a fair bit of sugar so you could probably cut back on the mole ass and replace it with vole or shrew ass instead.
    Punctuation is important. It's the difference between "I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse" and "I helped my uncle Jack off a horse"


  22. #22
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    I like ham and beans with corn bread


  23. #23
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    Ham & Bean Soup1 pound dried Great Northern Beans, soaked overnight or via theQuick Soak Method and drained. (Some say drain after soaking, others don’t, I don’t think it matters *that* much.)
    1-2 ham hocks (depends on size, I used 2)
    ~ 3/4 c. chopped carrots (~1 medium carrot)
    ~ 3/4 c. chopped celery (~1.5 stalks)
    ~ 3/4 c. chopped sweet onion (I went with a somewhat large chop, and chose sweet over white since the white onions this season have been incredibly strong, and I didn’t want it to overpower the rest of the soup.)
    ~1-2 cloves garlic, smashed
    2-4 c. water
    2-4 c. chicken stock
    1 ham steak, diced or shredded (optional, but that way you get more ham in the soup!)
    ground black pepper
    Sweat the onions, garlic and celery over medium low heat with about half the ham steak pieces. (The ham adds a little more fat for the aromatics to happily bathe in. Or, “it seemed like a good idea at the time!”)Once the onions are soft, add the ham hocks, the rest of the ham steak, 2 cups of water and 2 cups of stock. (That was how much was needed to cover everything in liquid.) Bring to a boil. (Takes 10-15 minutes.)Add the beans, carrots and a few shakes of black pepper, and if needed, a little more water if the beans aren’t covered by liquid. Give it all a good stir and bring to a boil again.Reduce heat to low and cover. Check about every 30 minutes and add more liquid (half water/stock) if needed.Simmer for 1.5 to 2 hours or until beans are tender. When the skin on the beans splits when you blow on them, they are supposedly done. However, the skins were splitting about an hour into it, and the beans didn’t taste “done” to me.An hour and a half in, I took out the ham hocks and let it simmer on low for another 30 minutes uncovered. Up until this point, the soup hadn’t been very thick at all, and I was ready to add some cornstarch, but it decided to cooperate and thicken up nicely. (Probably because at this point the beans are technically overcooked, but who cares, they’re nice and soft and tasty!)

  24. #24
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  25. #25
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    Cook them and then let women wrestle in the beans.

    baked-beans-wrestle.jpg

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