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  1. #1
    genec genec's Avatar
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    signs of the pending apocalypse at the office...

    • The company stock is hovering around a dollar.
    • Coffee stations around the office are missing supplies... it's hard to put a cup of coffee together.
    • There are "secret meetings."
    • Vendors don't return your calls.
    • You notice fewer and fewer folks attenting "critical meetings."



    Go on...

  2. #2
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    I'm sorry to hear this. I've been through this several times and really really feel for you.

    Couchie

  3. #3
    Squirrelly Member trsidn's Avatar
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    The CEO of the company holds a meeting and tells you 'everyone's job is secure'.


    This thread is not funny.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Yet more proof that I'm.. well, pretty much right about everything.

  4. #4
    Hey guyz? Guyz? Wait up!! Siu Blue Wind's Avatar
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    -They start asking people to take vacations during the company's busiest times.
    - Absolutely no more overtime.
    - 40 hour people are now at 24 hours.
    - The janitors come ever other night instead of every night.
    Quote Originally Posted by Buddha
    We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by making View Post
    Please dont outsmart the censor. That is a very expensive censor and every time one of you guys outsmart it it makes someone at the home office feel bad. We dont wanna do that. So dont cleverly disguise bad words.

  5. #5
    Senior Member rumrunn6's Avatar
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    get the interviews going
    cycling is like baseball ~ it doesn't take much to make it interesting

  6. #6
    Banned. ModoVincere's Avatar
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    They promote someone to VP and send them on a financial talk show the next monday morning.

  7. #7
    Pedaled too far. Artkansas's Avatar
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    • When they don't issue pay checks but still want you to work.
    • When they close down the office and expect everyone to work from home.
    • When they move the company headquarters and it's customer base to Indonesia.
    • When you are assigned to inventory the company's spares and supplies and sell what you can on eBay.
    • When the Creative Director is doing tech support for the network.
    "He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

    Quote Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
    I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.

  8. #8
    Chepooka StupidlyBrave's Avatar
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    Your CEO is featured on "American Greed" TV show. Link: http://www.cnbc.com/id/23240635

  9. #9
    Sore saddle cyclist Shifty's Avatar
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    They install a cash register at the receiving dock to pay for the deliveries, otherwise the trucks drive away.
    Those voices in your head aren't real, but they have some great ideas

  10. #10
    Senior Member
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    They ask you to bring your own toilet paper

  11. #11
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    You go to order more Kleenex and told to use toilet paper instead. <-- Happened for real.

  12. #12
    Senior Member eja_ bottecchia's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear all of this. Job security ain't what it used to be.
    My current stable:

    1989 SLX Bottecchia (Campy Athena 11s)
    1999 Cannondale F400 mountain bike
    2012 Bianchi Infinito (Campy Record 11s)
    2012 Colnago C59 in PR99 color scheme (Campy Record 11s)

  13. #13
    rugged individualist wphamilton's Avatar
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    Look out for hired buisiness consultants. That are having focus meetings with employees about what's important to you. they're evaluating you, not your ideas and opinions ...Town Hall meetings with assurances, VP's spending all their time in closed offices, HR people uncharacteristically chatty.

  14. #14
    Banned.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Artkansas View Post
    • When the Creative Director is doing tech support for the network.
    That's been happening here for years

  15. #15
    Banned.
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    The president of your family owned company quits because of differing opinions within the family on the direction the company is taking.
    Just happened here.

  16. #16
    You gonna eat that? Doohickie's Avatar
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    When your logon doesn't work and the IT folks can't help.

    (Yes, it happened to me once.)
    I stop for people / whose right of way I honor / but not for no one.



    Originally Posted by bragi "However, it's never a good idea to overgeneralize."

  17. #17
    Senior Member no motor?'s Avatar
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    People stop spending so much time on bf.

  18. #18
    Senior Member himespau's Avatar
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    When they start asking you about your TPS reports...
    Punctuation is important. It's the difference between "I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse" and "I helped my uncle Jack off a horse"


  19. #19
    Senior Member Keith99's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by trsidn View Post
    The CEO of the company holds a meeting and tells you 'everyone's job is secure'.


    This thread is not funny.
    This post is not funny. I was laid off from my previous job the day after my boss had asked just that question about our departmetn in particular.
    Perish any man who suspects that these men either did or suffered anything unseemly.

  20. #20
    Super Moderator no1mad's Avatar
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    The executive board decides to retain the services of a law firm that historically has a record of leading Fortune companies through bankruptcy and then circulates a memo internally that the media outlets are wrong and there is no plans to file.

  21. #21
    Bicycle Repair Man !!! Sixty Fiver's Avatar
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    Your key card stops working...

  22. #22
    derailleurs are overrated bigbenaugust's Avatar
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    When Larry Ellison shows up.
    --Ben
    Carrboro Bike Coalition - putting the "bike" in "CARrboro" :)
    2011 Motobecane Fantom Cross Uno, 2009 Motobecane Fantom CX
    Previously: 2000 Trek 4500 (2000-2003), 2003 Novara Randonee (2003-2006), 2003 Giant Rainier (2003-2008), 2005 Xootr Swift (2005-2007), 2007 Nashbar 1x9 (2007-2011), 2011 Windsor Shetland (2011-2014)
    Current Linux Usage (by machine): Arch: I Debian: II openSUSE: I

  23. #23
    Mister Bleak! mconlonx's Avatar
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    You are told you have a meeting with these guys:

    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus regarding mconlonx View Post
    You, I don't generally think of you as clueless. You're kind of ok.
    I know next to nothing. I am frequently wrong.

  24. #24
    Senior Member ka0use's Avatar
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    when you get a new department supervisor who is there to 'oversee things'.
    she was hired to 'oversee' the exit interviews; i.e. do the actual firings.

    i actually liked her a lot. i was one of the last ones out the door. she took her severance
    package, retired to mexico and was murdered in her bed by a local- beat to death with a chunk
    of cinder block.

    the company was bought for just one part of it's technological process, then closed down.
    first star on the right and straight on 'til morning
    avatar is of dame edna

  25. #25
    Administrator CbadRider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bigbenaugust View Post
    When Larry Ellison shows up.
    If you are female and play your cards right, you could have a chance at being the next ex-Mrs. Ellison.
    Quote Originally Posted by toddles View Post
    So Tom only hires people that are nutty? Is part of the requirement to be a moderator on this site is that you have to be nuts??
    Forum Guidelines *click here*

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