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Old 11-23-12, 11:33 PM   #1
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Hi guys... I have been missing the last few days

I was on a road trip.

I have a gazillion troubles but won't say much cuz I usually get flamed later for sharing too much stuff. Enough to say I'm single again.
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Old 11-23-12, 11:51 PM   #2
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<--------------------------------------------------
Glad you're back. There's been a few changes ^ while you were gone...

And yet your news gives me a sad.
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Old 11-24-12, 12:03 AM   #3
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Oh, she turned out to be a man, huh?
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Old 11-24-12, 12:08 AM   #4
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Sorry
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Old 11-24-12, 12:15 AM   #5
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We will still always love our Ruben.
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Old 11-24-12, 12:23 AM   #6
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We will still always love our Ruben.
Indeed.
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Old 11-24-12, 01:38 AM   #7
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THX guys... I've been really down lately.

See, with GF gone and being single and the stigmata of being an old man just turned 40, I was really depressed. I spent a lot of time chatting/PM'ing people on another forum and guess what? There was a girl who actually liked me. So I asked her out and she said yes (yipii). And I left freaking Florida, went south to Orlando, turned west till I reached I-10, went North almost to Georgia, turn West again and crossed the FL Panhandle, crossed Alabama, crossed Mississippi, crossed half Louisiana and short of reaching Texas, I reach my destination. Met the woman (freaking amazing woman, super intelligent, beautiful, etc) and we spend the night. I was magical.

Now, since everybody knows us both on that site and gentlemen don't do and tell, I didn't said anything. I just gave vague details about a trip and about being amazed, inlove, etc. The woman then posted "it's me, me memememe!". And people started asking me is it was true. I asked her "what you want me to say?" and she said to mention "that we dated and had relationships".

So I answer people's questions, didn't even mentioned the sex, just the dating part and all hell broke loose. I was reprimanded, almost banned, got hate PM's, people stopped talking to me, etc.

My guess, they are just freaking jealous because I dated the most beautiful/intelligent/amazing/interesting member of that forum.

I highly doubt this will end up in a serious relationship because after the trip, the woman had some other serious issues (left family home and went to live with some relatives), I don't have the resources to pursue anything at this time (can't barely pay my rent), she's 875 miles away and every person on that other web site is probably (I'm sure of it) telling her I'm not good for her.

In any case, I'm happy I met this woman. She totally erased every single ex I ever had out of my mind. The green eyes of my kid's mother? He have them (even the same name), the intelligence of the chemical-engineer ex-girlfriend? She has it, the 114 pounds body of my first ex-wife? Yup, that too... A published writer like ex-girlfriend #2? Yup, she is all that too. And she likes guns, and she likes everything I like and I like everything she likes... Better to have tried and failed that not tried at all... right?

So Here's I'm back as a broken-hearted refugee, of a place where forum members date and marry and nobody complains about it.
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Old 11-24-12, 01:42 AM   #8
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Oh, forgot to mention: It will be a few weeks till I can say for sure, but there might be a minnie-rube in the oven, somewhere in Louisiana.
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Old 11-24-12, 01:46 AM   #9
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hang in there dude
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Old 11-24-12, 01:49 AM   #10
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hang in there dude
Hanging. And lets give some credit to the 12 years old Hyundai for not breaking down during the 1750 miles round trip.
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Old 11-24-12, 01:53 AM   #11
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Dude, if she means that much to you, then you can tell the collective community to get stuffed. If you two are really meant for each other, use the interwebz to stay in touch. After all, how many people who met here on this forum that went on to have a successful long distance relationship and ultimately marriage?
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Old 11-24-12, 02:01 AM   #12
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Dude, if she means that much to you, then you can tell the collective community to get stuffed. If you two are really meant for each other, use the interwebz to stay in touch. After all, how many people who met here on this forum that went on to have a successful long distance relationship and ultimately marriage?
Thanks man... I was kinda getting annoyed with the site anyways. See, in here, forum rules are clear and when a thread is locked an explanation is given. Over there, out of the blue, perfectly good threads that break no written rules, get closed out of the blue, no explanation, no nothing. One guy (great friend of mine from Canada) posted a link about fluoridated water and got perma-banned on the spot. Many others have been warned or had their thread locked for mentioning their religion (without discussing it) and silly things like that. POsting there was like walking on a minefield. Sooner or later I was gonna hit a bomb. So, I went out with helluva bang.
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Old 11-24-12, 04:54 AM   #13
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First off, 40 is NOT old

Secondly, good to see you back This place isn't the same without you. Spry doesn't know what to do with himself.

Sorry to hear about your heartbreak ... seriously. You're a good man, and deserve to be happy.
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Old 11-24-12, 07:36 AM   #14
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I wish I was magical..
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Old 11-24-12, 07:55 AM   #15
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Ruben I'm gonna be straight with you in sister kind of a way, so hear me out.

You've been through hell, dude. All kinds of things have come at you and somehow you manage to keep things together. You've had a lot of heartaches and let downs (and of all things that Hyundai came through) but you always held out and were strong. You've pulled through. That kind of stuff the past couple of years wears a person down. Frustrates a person. Gets annoying and sometimes you just want to say eff it all.

Then this lady comes along.

Charming, beautiful, smart, fun. Everything you would want in a gal, enough to travel all that way to see her, right? She's PERFECT!

But one thing you didn't keep in mind. There's a reason she's single.

She's an adult (around your age?) and doesn't have her crap together? I know that times are tough but leaving the family and going to live with relatives? You are seeing the outside part of her not the inside. Have you KNOWN her very long? Been through thick and thin with her? Seen her at her worst and how she's handled things? Seen her compassion and how she gave things her all in order to help someone? Has she celebrated your children with you? Shown unequivocal love to her parents? Have good work relationships at work? Able to handle personal finances and be responsible for any negative things that come her way?

I know for a moment she seems like the perfect person and on your trip out to see her you were in a magical place. It was a fantasy lived out but when it comes to reality, and **** comes to ****, can she handle it? You've got kids to consider and you are going to need someone strong who will be by your side, be dedicated and under all circumstances, love you for who you are.

It was fun while you had it and right now I think you may be yearning for what more of that fantasy could have been but keep in mind that a fantasy is a fantasy, fun is fun, but when it comes to the heart and responsibility in life you gotta keep it real.

Your real love and true life mate will come. You just gotta enjoy your days that you have now and not feel the pressure of time to "have something".
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Old 11-24-12, 08:50 AM   #16
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Plus the last thing you need is to knock someone up.
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Old 11-24-12, 09:10 AM   #17
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Thx Siu

I have grown emotionally a lot. I have a gazillion times more confidence in myself than what I had years ago. Long gone are the days where I had to ask if Golden Coral was a good place for a first date. Because, you know what? *ANYTHING* is a good place for a first date, as long as I am myself and don't fake to be what I am not.

And enough of that... let me talk about the travel

Florida is freaking long and the panhandle feels like a never-ending place. Car was leaking oil and the low oil warning light does not work. I had to keep the window open, to hear when the engine started to wacka wacka, signaling that oil was in the low, then stop and pour a quarter. I had many stops due to overheating too. I carried 4 soda bottles full of water, which I refilled at every other rest station on the interstates. Then comes Alabama. First time Rube crosses a state line on his own, commando style (I did had underwear, I just mean I was on my own, unsupported).

Alabama was freaky. I was already spooked after so many movies of KKK hanging anything not-white. But being in actual Alabama felt like a trap. Road 98 is deserted. Gas stations are closed, convenience stores are closed. Much of the time the road is one lane to go and one lane to come back. I big contrast after traveling 6 hours on well maintained Interstate. Lots of traffic lights, lotsof areas with 35mph max speeds. It took forever.

Mississippi had a long way through non-interstate roads too. But roads were wider, with higher speed limits, less traffic lights and *people*! Gas stations opened (thanks god, Hyundai needed oil), and lots of places to stop, grab something to eat, etc. And people were friendly too.

Louisiana felt must like Florida, except it had less traffic and no tourists. I-20 is nice... could use re-pavement in some areas but it's OK. Southern accent is not hard at all to understand (I thought it would). And everybody understood my Puerto Rican accent without a hiccup. I didn't spotted a single Puerto Rican during my stay. But I didn't felt like an outsider and nobody asked me for an ID or told to me get back to Mexico.

Curious note: Traveling west at 70mph makes a beautiful sunset feel eternal. I wish you guys where there with your fancy SLR's.
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Old 11-24-12, 10:36 AM   #18
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Rube: I'm glad you're back, sorry for your losses, and listen to Siu. As well as the wacka wacka sounds coming from under the hood.
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Old 11-24-12, 10:46 AM   #19
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Bummer about the downs, good to hear there were some ups in there too.

So is that thing you had a couple weeks back that you wished you could tell us but couldn't?

If there's another mini-Rube on the way (assuming she decides to keep it), that's going to mean some more decisions to make. If not, well then, there are still decisions, but a lot less weight to them. Best of luck.
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Old 11-24-12, 02:20 PM   #20
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Bummer about the downs, good to hear there were some ups in there too.

So is that thing you had a couple weeks back that you wished you could tell us but couldn't?
On no no... the thing I could not tell you about was about a petition to the court to get the child support adjusted. Heck, I'm not making the big bucks anymore, I need that adjusted. I couldn't tell you because I knew ex-wife was gonna flip out about it. She got served and did flipped out, but cooled off in a few days. Some drama but not much. Not enough for a full RubenStory(TM) chapter.
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Old 11-24-12, 03:19 PM   #21
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I say just count your blessings Ruben. I'm 45 now and just got engaged. Keep an open mind and smell the flowers while you're still here.
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Old 11-24-12, 05:12 PM   #22
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I say just count your blessings Ruben. I'm 45 now and just got engaged. Keep an open mind and smell the flowers while you're still here.
Agreed. I'm gonna reboot the troubles... feeling heart-broken no more... I'm BACK!

Now, what should I write a rubenstory about? I've been running out of material. Since I bought the Ruger 10/22, squirrels are in check and not chewing any pipes. No trees have caught on fire. No branch of government has been called to my house. It's al been good. I guess we gonna have to invent a few stories...
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Old 11-24-12, 05:53 PM   #23
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or you could talk about your magical trip in more detail...or not. You are a gentleman after all.
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Old 11-24-12, 06:08 PM   #24
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Not to worry Rubester.
As soon as i heard you were single and have your bait in the water again I started posting your picture and # in all the womens restrooms up here.

You're back as a "playa"again
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Old 11-24-12, 09:38 PM   #25
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Agreed. I'm gonna reboot the troubles... feeling heart-broken no more... I'm BACK!

Now, what should I write a rubenstory about? I've been running out of material. Since I bought the Ruger 10/22, squirrels are in check and not chewing any pipes. No trees have caught on fire. No branch of government has been called to my house. It's al been good. I guess we gonna have to invent a few stories...
No auto repairs on the kitchen table to report?

It might be time to teach your little girl how to make an origami reindeer.
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