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Old 11-25-13, 08:31 PM   #1
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Something for the Foo men for the holidays

If the toilet spray to get rid of odors is for the Foo women, these would make perfect gifts for the Foo men. Especially those who eat high fiber and sit in the same cubicle aisle as I do at work.
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Old 11-26-13, 08:58 AM   #2
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I find that if I wear GORE-TEX® pants, the gasses are stored there until I take them off.
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Old 11-26-13, 10:36 AM   #3
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if i get a good christmas bonus
each and every one of you will be receiving a box of these

damn
even hyperlinks have to go through the filter

s***tens
disposable mitten shaped wet wipes
go to: www.gets***ens.com

Last edited by CbadRider; 11-26-13 at 02:48 PM. Reason: Letting the word censor do its thing.
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Old 11-26-13, 10:37 AM   #4
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I used to work in an office that was an open design, the cubicle wall where only about 3 1/2 feet high. The chairs where the kind that had mesh for the back, and the seat. So there was no muffler, or filter. And there was this one guy.......
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Old 11-26-13, 10:41 AM   #5
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I used to work in an office that was an open design, the cubicle wall where only about 3 1/2 feet high. The chairs where the kind that had mesh for the back, and the seat. So there was no muffler, or filter. And there was this one guy.......

i might be the only one who remembers the play dough mop top hair shop
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Old 11-26-13, 10:58 AM   #6
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Okay, here is the skinny. Men are used to eating and drinking stuff that we like and then farting and burping. We eat meat and drink beer.

Women on the other hand eat and drink all kinds of incongruent things. Cucumber finger sandwiches with cream cheese. Hummus and artichoke hearts. Triple frappachcocachino with cinnamon and caramel. And they are afraid to let fly with a nice fart, so they hold all that stuff in and then let it ferment and coagulate and finally, when the pressure builds to a point that they can no longer restrain it, they let out the most noxious gaseous emmissions known to man.

If women would just follow our lead and belch or fart at the first hint of pressure, it would be better for all of us.
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 11-26-13, 11:39 AM   #7
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You want to get Foo Men soemthing for the holidays, get them this.

[video=youtube;AsrodwSpzYg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AsrodwSpzYg&feature=youtu.be[/video]
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Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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Old 11-26-13, 11:40 AM   #8
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Old 11-26-13, 01:13 PM   #9
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I find that if I wear GORE-TEX® pants, the gasses are stored there until I take them off.
Do you find that your pants inflate slightly?
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Old 11-26-13, 01:35 PM   #10
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I find that if I wear GORE-TEX® pants, the gasses are stored there until I take them off.
Does that mean they could be used as rocket pants with a lighter applied near the bottom of the leg?
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Old 11-26-13, 08:22 PM   #11
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Does that mean they could be used as rocket pants with a lighter applied near the bottom of the leg?
You just gave me a great idea. Hold my beer, I'm going to the toolshed...
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Old 12-22-13, 11:38 AM   #12
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Does that mean they could be used as rocket pants with a lighter applied near the bottom of the leg?
You are a Polish cannon?
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Old 12-22-13, 12:57 PM   #13
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You just gave me a great idea. Hold my beer, I'm going to the toolshed...
5 Minutes Later....

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I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
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Old 12-22-13, 01:11 PM   #14
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What you need is an anti-exposure dry suit for pilots. It's like wearing a ziplock bag with booties that seals at the wrists and neck. That thing will contain all sorts of bodily function unpleasantness. While protecting the sensitive noses of your colleagues, extracting one's self from such an enclosure, however, exposes all that unpleasantness at one time and is truly...uh....unpleasant.
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Old 12-22-13, 07:00 PM   #15
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Fart shorts? Wouldn't you rather *** this for Christmas?:

[video=youtube;h-V04Q-Ymhk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-V04Q-Ymhk[/video]
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Old 12-22-13, 07:34 PM   #16
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I'd just like a patch kit for my inflatable doll...
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Old 12-23-13, 03:56 AM   #17
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I'd just like a patch kit for my inflatable doll...
The authorities look down on you holding her head under water while you're looking for air leaks.
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I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
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Old 12-23-13, 11:39 AM   #18
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I'd just like a patch kit for my inflatable doll...
Festivus must be over already, because you "pinned" her?
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Old 12-23-13, 01:36 PM   #19
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Those wacky Brits!
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Old 01-14-14, 02:21 PM   #20
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Scientific breakthrough

http://www.fastcoexist.com/3020388/t...-from-smelling
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Old 01-14-14, 02:24 PM   #21
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"Shreddies are designed to absorb odors, not to muffle the sound. Most flatulence sufferers are able to control the noise by altering their body position."
Well, they're halfway there. These with some sound deadening pants will be perfect.
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Old 01-14-14, 02:31 PM   #22
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I don't need those...my farts don't smell.
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Old 01-14-14, 02:32 PM   #23
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I don't need those...my farts don't smell.
Mine generally don't unless it is released moments before someone walks into my office...
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Old 01-14-14, 02:33 PM   #24
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These have been around for probably a decade now. Activated carbon is pretty neat stuff.
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Old 01-14-14, 02:34 PM   #25
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No the sound is the good half of a fart. The louder and juicier the better. Just do not need the smell.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by colorider View Post
Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.
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