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Old 04-23-14, 07:35 PM   #51
RaleighSport
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^^^^ Win.
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Old 04-23-14, 08:00 PM   #52
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Originally Posted by windhchaser View Post
Here's my story, sad but true
About a girl that I once knew.
She broke my heart, I became unglued,
It all started when she called me dude

Well today I leave the psycho ward
Cause my sentence did conclude:
I had killed a man with my bare hands
Because he called me dude

The jury said that I was insane.
Temporally insane - brain strain.
But now the doctors say I'm A.O.K.
So I start my new life today.

This story starts some years ago
As I vacationed by the sea.
In the California sunshine
Just me & my baby.

I was in love feeling sky high
When a big blonde lifeguard walked by.
He looked at her, she looked at him -
I knew it was good bye.

He took her by the hand, kicked sand in my face.
She looked & laughed & said, "Later Dude!"
They were gone without a trace
And the waves echoed her laughter
And her words...Yo Later Dude.

Later that night I was in such a bad mood
Sittin' in a bar drinkin' hard, getting stewed
Thinkin' 'bout that girl & how 'bout I'd been screwed
When some guy walks in sits next to me & says
What's up dude!

I heard the word dude & I became unglued.
Slowly I turned, step by step, inch by inch
And put my hands around his neck, and I squeezed...

DON'T CALL ME DUDE!

So that's how I got where I am
But this ain't where it ends.
The doctors said they cured me
I said good bye to my crazy friends.

I was smiling as i left that place
My life had been renewed.
The guard at the gate, he stamped my pass
And he said, "Yo Later Dude!"

Slowly I turned...
Dude!
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Old 04-23-14, 08:06 PM   #53
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here is the vid to above text https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbLhHtaVIO4
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Old 04-24-14, 02:32 PM   #54
deeth82
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Originally Posted by katsrevenge View Post
Same. Didn't see the point in dating someone that I wasn't friends with. Too many creeps to not weed them out via friendship first.

That said... this thread looks really familiar.
I seriously think I gave this guy advice once before, on this same subject, and was told I was wrong or cruel or...something.
I THOUGHT this was a familiar thread! I think I gave similar advice on the old one, too.

I think the best advice anyone can give/be given is "DO NOT place a person on a pedestal...even a low one". Too much pressure is placed on individuals because of a potential SO's romantic idea of who that person is...which usually ends up being too different from reality. This often happens before dating even becomes a possibility.

For ladies & gents, I say to remember the maxim "No matter how nice/pretty/funny they are...someone, somewhere is sick of their ****"...in other words, remember that these people are only human (just like you!), and not some picture-perfect love story waiting to unfold. Everyone's "love story" is built through mutual interaction and appreciation; otherwise it's just a fantastic infatuation.

I did the online dating rounds...it's where I met my wife, after meeting a string of wildly different women that were, in general, mostly good people...just people that I didn't romantically sync with.

Ironically, I wasn't going to send a message to the woman who would later become my wife, because A) She lived over 100 miles away, and B) She seemed at the time to be way too intellectual, i.e., she would probably not enjoy dating a guy who can "get down in the gutter" with his dark humor from time to time. She ended up dropping me a line expressing her interest, and after getting to know her a bit, the internal light switch flipped on: Most women (just like most men) already have a general idea of what they're looking for, and if they're not seeming to make the slightest effort to show interest, that's no reason to wrack one's brain overthinking things...either they're playing "hard to get" on a level you just don't "get", or they're just not interested. There are MILLIONS of possibilities out there, thanks to modern-day communications technology.

I think @VeloNewbie is doing ok by making his intentions known, but this girl sounds more and more like she's not interested.

Last edited by CbadRider; 04-24-14 at 07:09 PM. Reason: Undefeated the word censor
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Old 04-24-14, 03:25 PM   #55
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Originally Posted by Keith99 View Post
Inflection matters.

"Aw, thanks dude." means thanks, and it can show anything from a very real affection to 'I don't care enough to remember your name'.

Inflection is what makes the difference.
This...100%.

And that is what makes online communications a poor substitute for one-on-one, face to face talking.

Good luck in your quest.
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Old 04-26-14, 07:48 AM   #56
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Instead of sweating over a damn word in agony, just ask her if she wants to take a next step, if not then thats that.

I've had girls i was with say & call me dude, and it was definitely not "friend zone" related. My best friend (female) uses it with me all the time, but its because its a word she uses often, not because she is friend zoning me.

Worst thing anyone can do in these situations is assume & that's what your first reaction was. I would be more worried bout that than a girl calling you dude.

- Andy
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Old 04-26-14, 07:55 AM   #57
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Originally Posted by katsrevenge View Post
Same. Didn't see the point in dating someone that I wasn't friends with. Too many creeps to not weed them out via friendship first.

That said... this thread looks really familiar.
I seriously think I gave this guy advice once before, on this same subject, and was told I was wrong or cruel or...something.
Weeding out via friendship is probably the most inhumane torture anyone has ever devised. Fell into that pit too many times, never again!

- Andy
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Old 04-26-14, 11:11 PM   #58
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Weeding out via friendship is probably the most inhumane torture anyone has ever devised. Fell into that pit too many times, never again!

- Andy
Best way to find a man worth keeping.

Looks fade. For some, the sex drive goes. But if you can find someone whose company you truly and completely enjoy... that's what lasts.

FWTW, there is also some truth behind that old saying about awomanknowing if she'd share a bed with a guy in the first five minutes of meeting him. That probably has to do with compatible pheromones or something. The 'freinds first' is just a good way to check out how the guy acts with others, treats kids/waitstaff/animals and so on.
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Old 04-27-14, 02:23 AM   #59
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Originally Posted by katsrevenge View Post
Best way to find a man worth keeping.

Looks fade. For some, the sex drive goes. But if you can find someone whose company you truly and completely enjoy... that's what lasts.

FWTW, there is also some truth behind that old saying about awomanknowing if she'd share a bed with a guy in the first five minutes of meeting him. That probably has to do with compatible pheromones or something. The 'freinds first' is just a good way to check out how the guy acts with others, treats kids/waitstaff/animals and so on.
I thought that was what dating was for?

For me friends stay friends. As for "a woman knowing"... i know all most instantly if i'm interested in a lady. Though at this point i don't do anything about it because at my age & with my experience most women want to be left alone due to being barraged by creepy come-ons all day or maybe they have some life complication they think i can't handle. Best not even bother as sad as it sounds.

- Andy
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Old 04-27-14, 02:32 AM   #60
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Originally Posted by VeloNewbie View Post
If a girl calls a guy "dude", is that being put in the friend zone? I am more so asking the
20-30 something year old people because people in those age groups speak differently than older people. Its a woman I like that I just met and im hoping to get to know her. I said something to her on FB and she responded ok(she said "aw, thanks dude"), its just that she put "dude" in it. Shes 30 years old. Granted, she is kinda punkish a little, but still... Its kinda bugging me.....
I suppose it varies based on whether the context is "dude, come here and give it to me RIGHT NOW" or "dude, why don't you take a long walk off a short cliff".
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Old 04-27-14, 08:06 AM   #61
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Originally Posted by EthanYQX View Post
"Do you think I could get your number so we could go out sometime?"

Yes or no question. Ask it, move on. She won't be mean, and getting shot down doesn't hurt that much.
You never know. Maybe her answer would be something like "i will be working at *blank,blank, blank*, from *blank time* to *blank time* come by and hang out,get drunk eat a cheeseburger".
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Old 04-27-14, 12:23 PM   #62
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You never know. Maybe her answer would be something like "i will be working at *blank,blank, blank*, from *blank time* to *blank time* come by and hang out,get drunk eat a cheeseburger".
Well, yeah, that'd be a possibility, but at least then she expects you and is maybe even a little excited to see you show up

As an aside, if you can find a girl who thinks "beer and a cheeseburger" is a good date, you're doing pretty well.
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Old 05-20-14, 12:54 PM   #63
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did the OP gets lucky or what? I've been away from this thread for a while ...
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Old 05-27-14, 04:09 AM   #64
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So, a few years ago, after a ride, a friend and I stopped for a coffee at the local gas mart. My friend left his sunglasses on the coffee counter when he went to pay. Some guy picked the glasses up and gave them to my friend. My friend said "Thanks dude". A few minutes later the guy that returned the glasses approached us outside and said "You guys must not be from around here". We said "Why's that". He said "Nobody calls me dude". He thought he was some kinda tough guy and I'd never seen him before. Needless to say, we had a good laugh.
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