Originally Posted by rm -rf

Both feet on the ground, and drinking from the water bottle usually works.


No, you go. Heh.

Originally Posted by caloso

You were right to refuse. Probably the closest I ever came to being killed on the bike was due to a well-intentioned driver in a situation just like this. I and some other commuters had a stop sign, the driver did not, but she stopped anyway and tried to wave us through. We all waved back, she kept waving, we put our feet down, no you go you have the right of way. Behind her, some impatient jackwagon got tired of waiting and slung around her on the right, just missing our front wheels. Now, obviously if one of us had been hit, it would have been mostly the fault of the impatient jackwagon, but the overly-nice, well-intentioned driver created the situation by trying to cede her right of way.

You don't have to be a jerk about it, but it's a potentially lethal situation. Safety trumps feelings.

Originally Posted by Digital_Cowboy

How do others here deal with overly courteous motorists? The other week I was at an intersection that was a two-way stop. Out of the corner of my eye I see a SUV coming from my right, with "surprise, surprise" their turn signal on indicating that they were going to turn left on to the road that I was on.

Even though I was the only one with the stop sign, the driver stopped and tried to wave me through the intersection. I pointed out to her that she was the one who had the right of way. Her response was that she was "trying to be nice to me." I then told her that that kind of niceness get's cyclists killed. And waited for her to make her left turn.

Needless to say that it goes without saying, and this was actually confirmed by another person who was in the park to my right using the exercise equipment. That in her mind I was the "bad guy" for not excepting her kind offer. He confirmed that he'd overheard the woman talking to a friend about the situation.

Now yes, at this particular intersection and at the time of day/night that we were going through it I could have "safely" accepted her kind offer. Except that it sets a dangerous precedent. Not to mention that had there been a cop in the area, there wasn't, that I would have been the one who could have potentially gotten a ticket.

And I suppose that in the long run an "overly courteous driver" is better to deal with vs one who "wants" to kills us because we "dare" to be on "their" road.

So how do others deal with an "overly courteous motorist?"

Originally Posted by kevindsingleton

I would have just turned right, until she cleared the intersection, then continued with my course.

Originally Posted by Booger1

I normally have food and water,I can out wait them......Like I'm going to pull out in front of somebody that doesn't understand driving.

Originally Posted by Maelochs

Interesting, because this stuff happen pretty frequently (or I tend to recall when it happens.) I usually insist on letting the car go first, because it cannot hit me if it is in front of me. If a motorist wanted to discuss it, that’s what I would say ... or I might say, “Well, you’d just have to pass me later, and I wouldn’t want to hold you up if the road were narrow and you couldn’t squeeze by.”


I would never tell a driver “that kind of niceness get's cyclists killed.” (sic) because it really doesn’t. So long as the driver notices me and communicates with me, there is no real threat. The ones who threaten me are the ones who don’t see me, dismiss me, assume that because I ride a bike I have no rights on the road, or plain don’t see me because I am not a car or a truck. I certainly don’t want to alienate one of the very few courteous and considerate drivers out there---they are too rare.


Sometimes I get a little annoyed because I will pull up to an intersection and I don’t want to unclip. I will balance as long as I can, waiting for the other driver to go, waving and pointing trying my best to insist that the other goes ... and almost every time, it seems, right after I unclip and put a foot down, they get the message and go.


But again, I cannot get too upset about a driver who actually respects the fact that cyclists share the road.


The other kind of overly cautious driver which causes more problems than they prevent are the ones who are afraid to pass. Very often, since I try to ride smallish roads, I will get a car behind me which simply will not pass, even if there is room. Eventually I will pull into a side street, but on a lot of my rides there is simply nowhere to go—no side streets—and since I ride at night a lot, pulling off the road is extremely risky.


What these timid drivers don’t realize, is that all the cars backed up behind them are raging, and enraged drivers are a lot less likely to use car and caution when finally passing me. Again, I will slow and wave and point and try to encourage the driver, but sometimes there is nothing to do but press on and hope for a spot where i can pull off safely.


And again—better than the cars which pass and start to pull over before they are fully past because they tried to squeeze between me and oncoming traffic. Courteous, even timid, might be annoying but it is a lot less dangerous than the folks who simply don’t think or care.

Originally Posted by tarwheel

It's annoying but not worth making a scene about. I won't go if doing so would be dangerous, such as crossing a multi-lane road. However, if it's simply an intersection with 2-lane roads and no other cars are present, I would accept the courtesy and go. What baffles me is drivers who arrive at a 4-way stop long before me, and then sit there and wait. I suspect that they are curious more than anything and want to see what that weirdo is with all of the bright lights.

Originally Posted by GerryinHouston

You have the STOP sign, she didn't. She has the right of way. You stop and wait, giving her her right of way. She stops and asks you to go. She transfers her right of way to you. You pass and wave thank you.

You don't have to wait for her to go through if she communicates that she will go after you. Suppose that she'd stop and wait for the sunset. Would you wait too?

Originally Posted by Maelochs

The problem here is one of communication. if she waves you on, then decides you have taken too long and decides to go, ... this has happened to me more than once. Drivers can be impatient, indecisive ... and communication via hand signs is not always clear. Sometimes they think you mean "I'll go" when you mean "I'll wait" and vice versa. In a car when both drivers decide to go it usually is nothing worse than some hard braking and embarrassment or anger. When one of the pair is on a bike ... I try to make Very sure that I know what each party plans to do, and whenever possible I wait, even if That annoys the other driver. Much rather have a car in front of me than behind me.

Originally Posted by Wilfred Laurier

I fear this may be because they are conditioned by seeing cyclists blow through stop signs. When I ride in the city I follow (almost) all the rules of the road, and I get many surprised and pleased looks from motorists.

Originally Posted by avidone1

I agree that the overly nice driver can be a hazard. When they stop for no reason except to wave you through when they have the right of way creates unpredictability. That makes me nervous.
On the other hand, she was trying to be "safe" as well as "nice" and I appreciate that. I would never point out to an overly courteous driver that they are wrong and in fact acting dangerously.
There are too many ways to let the driver go on her way without making her feel stupid. Some have been mentioned already like taking a drink, turning down the intersection etc. I have done many of these.
I'll bet your friend who overheard her will tell you that she spoke of the incident in global terms. As in "Those bike riders..."
I sure don't want to be the next cyclist who encounters her at an intersection.

Originally Posted by Leebo

I have one T stop that is terrible in that regard. Lanes turning, people trying to be nice with intention but bad in reality. I look away, wave them on or sometimes just pedal in a circle. They can't control the other 3 lanes of traffic. They should just take their right of way. If both cars stop and wave, and I make eye contact with them, only then will I go if no other traffic is present. Niceholes? Could be quote of the week.

Originally Posted by rm -rf

Both feet on the ground, and drinking from the water bottle usually works.


No, you go. Heh.

Originally Posted by Digital_Cowboy

I didn't make a scene. I just politely told her that she had the right of way, and that what she was doing was potentially dangerous. As even if there wasn't (and there wasn't) a second car hidden from my view another car could have come up behind her not expecting her to stop where she wasn't required to stop.

What baffles me are the drivers who have to race me to the stop sign. Only to have to stop alongside of me in the wrong lane facing potential oncoming traffic.



Unless she is a cop and is directing traffic she doesn't have the authority to wave anyone through the intersection. As back when I took Driver's Ed in High School, we were taught that only cops directing traffic override traffic control devices.

If I was behind her and didn't know what she was planning to do, yes, I'd stay behind her until she moved. As it would be just my luck that I'd go to pass her only to have her turn at the last second.

Originally Posted by bakes1

1) You didn't make a scene?
I wonder considering you said yourself that another stranger discussed the incident with you later on. Either you asked him to discuss it or he saw you make a scene and brought it up? Either way based upon your OP it sure sounds like you escalated it. Or did this random stranger overhear a woman talking about an incident and then seek you out to discuss it with you?

Originally Posted by bakes1

2) Why do you keep talking about a possible hidden car? You said yourself in your OP "Now yes, at this particular intersection and at the time of day/night that we were going through it I could have "safely" accepted her kind offer. Except that it sets a dangerous precedent"
Which is it? Safety or a precedent?

Originally Posted by bakes1

3) All day long at damn near every uncontrolled intersection in the country drivers signal other drivers to proceed without recognizing the legal right of way.
What is your point again about what is legal and what you were taught in driver's ed?

Originally Posted by bakes1

Either way your reference: "And I suppose that in the long run an "overly courteous driver" is better to deal with vs one who "wants" to kills us because we "dare" to be on "their" road" says a lot more than your words do about how you generalize drivers.
And lastly, did you politely point out that what she was doing was potentially dangerous as you said in post 31 or did you tell her that niceness gets cyclists killed as you stated in your OP? Which was it?

Originally Posted by exmechanic89

I'm good with nice motorists, personally..

Originally Posted by caloso

Not cool, man. Not cool at all.

Originally Posted by Digital_Cowboy

Unless she is a cop and is directing traffic she doesn't have the authority to wave anyone through the intersection.

Originally Posted by 10 Wheels

If the roadway was clear I would go across after the wave.

Originally Posted by Digital_Cowboy

I was going straight through the intersection, not making a turn. She was making a left hand turn.