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Thread: Oh no !!!!!!!

  1. #1
    Skin-Pounder Bikes-N-Drums's Avatar
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    Oh no !!!!!!!

    This post is rather frank. If you don't like it, now's yer' chance to point yer' head the other way!



    So I'm out riding after work and I'm riding through some opulent neighborhoods and everybody's out - bikers & joggers everywhere. I wore a simple shorts & t-shirt combo today and people I'm approaching start looking at me funny (since they jog in the street into oncoming traffic we can see each other). I started feeling that too many people were giving me a funny look - so I look down and who did I find decided to pay a visit?
    Mr. Peepers. That's right, Big Al' & the Boys.
    It seems I've ripped a hole in my crotch. I'm 30 minutes into my ride, riding through country club neighborhoods, giving full frontal action shots to lawers, judges, doctors and their families - with another 30 minutes of bearing it all to everyone passing in metro Atlanta.

    GOSH, I LOVE MONDAYS!
    We are the musicmakers and we are the dreamers of dreams...

  2. #2
    Senior Member psycholist's Avatar
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    Not to worry...everybody surely knows you were simply attempting to increase your surface area in order to maximize evaporation and better dissipate excess heat.

    FRANKS AND BEANS!!!


    and by the way, Mr. Peepers sounds like the name of a puppet from Captain Kangaroo or something.
    providing a dependable source of aggravation for the motorists of Little Egypt

    "Wyatt, I am rolling."

  3. #3
    Grounded Inkwolf's Avatar
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    So, what did you do? Just scoot for home as fast as possible?

  4. #4
    Marathon Cyclist MediaCreations's Avatar
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    Maybe you should have picked up on the clue when someone asked, "Do you hang out here often?".

  5. #5
    Every lane is a bike lane Chris L's Avatar
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    So did you continue the ride or what? I bet that must have taken real balls.
    "I am never going to flirt with idleness again" - Roy Keane
    "We invite everyone to question the entire culture we take for granted." - Manic Street Preachers.
    My blog.
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  6. #6
    Senior Member psycholist's Avatar
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    That kinda thing will make your neighbors think you swing both ways.
    providing a dependable source of aggravation for the motorists of Little Egypt

    "Wyatt, I am rolling."

  7. #7
    bac
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    I was ready for the "Penthouse Forum letter" ending after reading the beginning of your post. I thought I was about to read something similar to the following:

    "... then I was approached by a 30-something house wife with slicked back, fiery red hair. She noticed my obvious manhood, and with a devilish smile, invited me back to her house for a quick repair ..."

    But nooooooo!

    Oh well, it was a great story without any embellishment!

  8. #8
    Senior Member psycholist's Avatar
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    bac,
    your red-haired seductress wouldn't have noticed anything unusual...I mean, some on-- don't MOST bikes have a kickstand?
    providing a dependable source of aggravation for the motorists of Little Egypt

    "Wyatt, I am rolling."

  9. #9
    huh? JaredMcDonley's Avatar
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    Man that is to much! The worst that has happed to me is when i crashed 2 weeks ago, the side of the shorts i was wearing ripped to the point that they would not stay up, But it wasn't that bad (had on a pair of the tight boxer so it looked like i was wearing some biking shorts!)

    LOL

    Jared
    Liking what you do is Happiness; Doing what you like is Freedom.

  10. #10
    Life is good RonH's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Bikes-N-Drums
    It seems I've ripped a hole in my crotch. I'm 30 minutes into my ride
    If the hole was that big I want to know how you managed to ride for 30 minutes without noticing the "breeze" down there.

    Sounds like you had a fun day anyway!

    Lucky for you Atlanta's finest wasn't patrolling in those neighborhoods.
    My bikes: 2001 Litespeed Tuscany---2015 Cannondale Supersix EVO carbon 105

    Life is like a 10-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use. ~ Charles Schultz

  11. #11
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    Good thing you weren't riding a recumbent!

  12. #12
    Dazed and confused Ellie's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Bikes-N-Drums
    That's right, Big Al' & the Boys.
    Is that bragging?!

    Now you've just got to hope you didn't see anyone you know!

    Ellie

  13. #13
    Senior Member psycholist's Avatar
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    Oh my gosh, Ellie, he DID call then Big Al and the Boys. I misread that--I thought he said Weird Al.
    providing a dependable source of aggravation for the motorists of Little Egypt

    "Wyatt, I am rolling."

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