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Old 06-21-05, 08:44 AM   #1
DenverCruiser
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How to get wife into biking?

I was wondering if any of you had any good stories/advice on how you got your girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband into biking.

I am not a crazy biker but do enjoy both mountain and road biking and would love for her to get into the sport as well.

Thanks.
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Old 06-21-05, 08:47 AM   #2
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tough call--you have to be really patient, esp if she is new to the sport or hasnt ridden in a while. Particularly, you will have to rememebr to slow down and go at a pace she can handle, which may or may not be frustarting to you.


There have been other threads on this topic here,----search the forums and good luck.
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Old 06-21-05, 08:50 AM   #3
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God, I love threads like this. First, of all have you asked her??? Start slow, if she is ok with giving it a try then go from there. Don't buy an expensive bike, buy something that she likes and is comfortable on first of all. The first thing all my girlfriends ask me, is how can you sit on a small seat for so long??? I tell them that you get use to it.

I think for most women who are new to this is and worried they are concerned with COMFORT AND FUN!!!! MAKE IT FUN.
Then go from there. If she really takes a likely to it then you can always up grade the bike and etc.

GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN!!!
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Old 06-21-05, 08:50 AM   #4
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You have any luck give away your secret to the rest of us. I bought my wife a hybrid..wanted a solid bike for her as a starter bike.. It gathers dust. and finally she backed into it with her car.
did go out a couple times. not enough to get the feel for the shifting.
couple suggestions. figure out what kind of riding would be a reward for her interests. maybe, buy her a starter bike and do what is fun for her..Maybe not hammering .
I have a picnic basket folded up into a back pack. thougth bike to some beautiful picnic spot might clinch her. never got to that stage. good luck...I wish so my wife would join me in my cycling.
she has not ruled out 100% that she never will try it. maybe later, she says.. but, she will never get into it as much as I have, she promises me. so there is hope. good luck.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:06 AM   #5
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I think having a fun destination in mind, like the picnic suggestion, is probably best for starting out. It's hard for normal people to understand the appeal of a long out-and-back ride, but going someplace fun, that's easy to get behind. My kids are getting interested in biking because we almost always head for a park with a playground.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:10 AM   #6
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First of all is your approach one of love or of nagging? If she loved you she would be open to it already, but the fact that you are asking all of us means she's not into it.
I would get her the best seat money could buy designed for a womens wider pelvic structure, up right hybrid bars, go on easy rides , and never, I repete never, drop her.
If you so much as leave her in the dust for even a split second she'll feel like
("screw you buddy, that's it .. no more or cycling for me...ever')..
Go on slower rides where-as the two of you can talk and observe the scenery, instead of all-out "ball's to the walls" rides that are more for training. I LIKE THE DESTINATION IDEA.
Have a place to look foward to.
Maybe a "Starbucks" for some cafe latte instead of just riding around for nothing.
That gives her a purpose to the ride, women are very practical.
Most men enjoy Cycling for the sence of adventure, freedom,the thrill of speed, the wind on your face...
I could be mistaken, but it seems that Women need an end result. "Fitness, Destination, Fashion"
Together, it can be so much more fun!
Good luck!

Last edited by king koeller; 06-21-05 at 09:20 AM.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:12 AM   #7
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I hadn't so much as touched a bike since I was 12 when I met my boyfriend the cycling fanatic. For me it was a mixture of the timing, ie wanting to do things with him early in the relationship, and also my being in awe of his abilities, I wanted to try it myself. He got me a very good starter road bike for my birthday, and a very comfy women's seat, an Oasis. Comfort is HUGELY important to sticking with this. And yes, don't make it a hill mashing session or she will probably get turned off. We just started with very short distances, and built from there. I never needed a particular destination on the bike, but a good dinner out afterwards is an excellent motivator!

What made all the difference was he kept me going by telling me how proud he was of every improvement I made on the bike (he's even got a brag thread in the road forums section! ), giving me big hugs at the top of hills etc. It was very encouraging and eventually I just got more and more interested in cycling. Now we are already talking about upgrading me to a better bike!
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Old 06-21-05, 09:21 AM   #8
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This worked for me (us).

I asked my wife if she wanted to ride along with me for "just a bit" on my morning commute. (I invited her to come with me as far as our neighbourhood bakery—about 10 blocks—for a cup of tea and a hamantaschen) We kept to fairly level terrain, and quiet neighbourhood streets—or the seawall—and stayed clear of major traffic arteries, crossing them only at lights. At first she came along for just those ten blocks, and gradually became more comfortable with shifting and going a little quicker.

It meant a slower, more circuitous route for me, but we just left a little earlier. She really got to love being up and out early, seeing the sunrise, being in the quiet city. Soon we were shopping for a "nice" pair of cycling gloves (not lumpy, like mine) Now when she rides escort, when our paths part, she rides on for quite a distance on her own.

If you're just starting, be patient—through the reminders of which way shifts up and which shifts down—and encouraging. Mentioning how good she looks on a bike never hurts, either.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:23 AM   #9
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If you have kids, start taking them out for long rides. She'll get tired of being alone in the house after awhile. Next thing you know, SHE'LL be taking the kids out for rides without you.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:31 AM   #10
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the above thread does not imply that women don't also love the feeling of adventure and freedom that cycling offers,.
I didn't mean to steroetype any one, male or female.
My opinion is based on my own limited views of past relationships that i have had in the past. Today my wife (Married 16 years) is full "gung ho" about cycling, but I wished some former girlfriends had shared my passion for biking, in the same way they wished I shared their passion for expensive clothes, and shopping at the Mall.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:31 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by konageezer
If you're just starting, be patient—through the reminders of which way shifts up and which shifts down—and encouraging. Mentioning how good she looks on a bike never hurts, either.
That is very true!!!
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Old 06-21-05, 09:40 AM   #12
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Great posts everyone, thank you. We are going to go for a leisurely ride this evening. I will make sure to take it VERY easy.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:49 AM   #13
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Take her on a picnic up Waterton Canyon. No auto traffic is allowed -- except service vehicles, yet I've never seen one. The road is a bit too rough for a road bike, but it's good for a hybrid/mtb. It's a slight uphill grade to the dam, so go slow, stop and sightsee the animals and river. Bring binoculars too. There are several bathroom stops on the six mile stretch. Lots of picnic tables.

Holy cow, I want to go right now!
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Old 06-21-05, 09:49 AM   #14
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I bought my wife a Trek 7300FX because she said she wanted to try riding with me. In three months she's been out the same number of times.

She said a month ago that she'd prefer starting indoors, working up stamina without having to battle wind and hills. So, I bought her a trainer and set up the bike in her office. She has used the trainer twice in a month, I think.

It's discouraging not only spending all this money seemingly for nothing, but also looking forward to riding with her only to have every suggestion shot down by this or that excuse.

And yes, we bought a women's seat right away when we got her bike. Everything on the bike is tuned up, and it's sized properly. So, that can't be it!

I'll keep working on her, and suggest destination rides from now on. It's just too bad that it's really pretty hilly around where I live, so there's no routes that we can take in any direction to avoid at least some effort.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:53 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DenverCruiser
I was wondering if any of you had any good stories/advice on how you got your girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband into biking.

I am not a crazy biker but do enjoy both mountain and road biking and would love for her to get into the sport as well.

Thanks.
So let me get this straight...you actually want to bring your wife with you on your ride? I thought the point of riding was to get away from them.

Seriously, I would like to be able to ride with my wife more often. My wife is very physically active and works out every morning at 4:30 AM at the local gym, just so i have time to ride before work. The fact that we have little ones at home makes it even more difficult for us to ride together.

We do the whole family deal, where we pull my youngest in the trailer and my 6 yr old rides his bike. He usually crashes at least once, then they usually get irritable and want to go home. So 5 miles is about the max for this type of outing.

I have only gotten to ride with my wife one time alone, ever! We rode about 12 miles and it was fun riding with her. Actually out of the thousands of miles i have ridden these were probably 12 of the best. It was fun sharing cycling with her. I hope to be able to do more of this when the kids get older.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:55 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Totoro
If you have kids, start taking them out for long rides. She'll get tired of being alone in the house after awhile. Next thing you know, SHE'LL be taking the kids out for rides without you.
BWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

sorry, just couldn't help it

My wife would like nothing better than for me to take the kids out of the house for looooong bike rides. She wouldn't mind being alone one bit.
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Old 06-21-05, 09:59 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DenverCruiser
I was wondering if any of you had any good stories/advice on how you got your girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband into biking.

I am not a crazy biker but do enjoy both mountain and road biking and would love for her to get into the sport as well.

Thanks.
One thing I've always done with activities I share with my wife is make sure she has better equipment than I do. Never had a problem with her motivation but she is exceptional.
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Old 06-21-05, 10:03 AM   #18
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If she wants to ride but is not comfortable steering, shifting, braking, you can always go the tandem route. Many couples find this works, especially if one of the pair (usually the man) is a much faster rider. Plus it's fun.
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Old 06-21-05, 12:18 PM   #19
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If you are having problems getting the wife to leave the house or spend more time on the bike, talk to her. Find out what makes her uncomfortable or concerns her about the ride you are proposing. Women don't always like to voice their fears (just like men) and will hope that their husband/significant other is tuned in enough to ask questions.

I love to go fast regardless of how (walking, riding, driving...) I love to feel the wind on my face, spending time on the road, checking out the scenary. My initial hold backs were my lack of understanding how to shift gears to my advantage and when to shift the gears. Next was my comfort - seat, wrists and shoulders.

My husband understands me enough to ask the questions and to work with me without making me feel stupid or small. He is supportive and also finds time to ride at his speeds or his challenge levels.

We go with destinations in mind sometimes. Treats show up as rewards (a quick stop at DQ for something cool or a banana at 7-11). Sometimes, I am tired and want to just chill. The hubby doesn't let me get away with that too often so he will motivate me to get out there and ride.

I guess what I am trying to say is you need to communicate and beaware of the other person's limitations. Keep these things in mind and she might get out there with you. If she doesn't love it as much as you do, don't sweat it. She probably has an activity that she wishes you would share with her but accepts that it won't ever happen.

Enjoy!
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Old 06-21-05, 05:31 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mominboots
If you are having problems getting the wife to leave the house or spend more time on the bike, talk to her. Find out what makes her uncomfortable or concerns her about the ride you are proposing. Women don't always like to voice their fears (just like men) and will hope that their husband/significant other is tuned in enough to ask questions.

I love to go fast regardless of how (walking, riding, driving...) I love to feel the wind on my face, spending time on the road, checking out the scenary. My initial hold backs were my lack of understanding how to shift gears to my advantage and when to shift the gears. Next was my comfort - seat, wrists and shoulders.

My husband understands me enough to ask the questions and to work with me without making me feel stupid or small. He is supportive and also finds time to ride at his speeds or his challenge levels.

We go with destinations in mind sometimes. Treats show up as rewards (a quick stop at DQ for something cool or a banana at 7-11). Sometimes, I am tired and want to just chill. The hubby doesn't let me get away with that too often so he will motivate me to get out there and ride.

I guess what I am trying to say is you need to communicate and beaware of the other person's limitations. Keep these things in mind and she might get out there with you. If she doesn't love it as much as you do, don't sweat it. She probably has an activity that she wishes you would share with her but accepts that it won't ever happen.

Enjoy!
If this don't work then tell her that you're taken' the blond down the street
for a ride since she hasn't got the time or interest.

If you live through that then the jelousy ought to do it.........
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Old 06-21-05, 06:15 PM   #21
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Just sell the car, buy her a bike and say "ride... or walk"
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Old 06-21-05, 06:49 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DenverCruiser
I was wondering if any of you had any good stories/advice on how you got your girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband into biking.
Duct tape.
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Old 06-21-05, 06:52 PM   #23
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I have been trying for almost a year...
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Old 06-21-05, 07:42 PM   #24
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I have been trying for almost a year...

three years for me. I got her to go on a 10 mile ride with me last year and she wants nothing to do with it. I offered to buy her a new bike (she said hers was uncomfortable) and she just said she wasn't into it.

That really sux cuz I want to do the TransAmerica trail in 08, and was hoping she would join me.
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Old 06-21-05, 08:04 PM   #25
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I was wondering how to get the guys I once dated to ride their bikes. One gave up his at the purchase of his first car and the other one prefered riding his motorcycles. After a while, I just concentrated on my own bikes and made sure that they each maintained a truck or a van to transport my bikes! You can't change someone unless he/she wants to.
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