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  1. #1
    Senior Member mike's Avatar
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    I have had several concerned Forum regulars contact me to see if I can confirm a startling rumor which, if true, could change the very fabric of the cycling community.

    The rumor is that Pete is, in fact, not a bicyclist at all. Word has it that he was searching the web for "Bi kefor uhmnus" which is some strange Norwegian dance society involving drinking fermented seal blubber oil and dancing in the moonlight with carved melon masks.

    As fate would have it, he stumbled on "BikeForums" by accident. The rest is history.

    It according to my sources, Pete is actually a professional wrestler who goes by some intimidating stage name yet unrevealed to me.

    To say the least, Pete is an unusual character. I am trying to piece together whatever information is available about him.

    If you have something to contribute that would provide some background on this fascinating character we know as Pete Clark, please do share it with us.
    Mike

  2. #2
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    We are going to have to get an attorney to look into this. Any good one you know of Oscar? Oh no wait, you're messed up, how about you Buddy?

  3. #3
    riding a Pinarello Prince orguasch's Avatar
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    yrtnuoc dlo eht ni kacb wal deiduts I em redisnoc nac uoy ,


    (it's hard being influence by Mike)
    "Racso", the well oiled machine;)

  4. #4
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Yeah Oscar, I'm sure we'll reach a settlement with only the people that care about you being able to understand your and Mikes incoherance...

  5. #5
    riding a Pinarello Prince orguasch's Avatar
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    okay, I am back, not quite!!!!
    "Racso", the well oiled machine;)

  6. #6
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Oh isn't this great Pete!!! Oscar is almost back!! Ya!!!!

  7. #7
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by mike
    I have had several concerned Forum regulars contact me to see if I can confirm a startling rumor which, if true, could change the very fabric of the cycling community.
    The rumor is that Pete is, in fact, not a bicyclist at all.
    I am afraid the rumor is true...I am actually only an admirer of cyclists.
    Word has it that he was searching the web for "Bi kefor uhmnus" which is some strange Norwegian dance society involving drinking fermented seal blubber oil and dancing in the moonlight with carved melon masks.
    This part is heresay. Actually, I was in the public library, surfing the net. It wasn't "Bi kefor uhmnus" I was searching for. It was, "Bike for Fun." Somehow I tangled my fingers while typing.
    As fate would have it, he stumbled on "BikeForums" by accident. The rest is history.
    I just hope history is kind to me!
    According to my sources, Pete is actually a professional wrestler who goes by some intimidating stage name yet unrevealed to me.
    This is true. I am a retired lightweight Southeastern American Sumo champion who goes by the singular name of, "Blue Christmas." You can check me out on reruns from Ted Turner's "Sumo South Network."
    To say the least, Pete is an unusual character. I am trying to piece together whatever information is available about him.
    I am ready to "bear all!"
    If you have something to contribute that would provide some background on this fascinating character we know as Pete Clark, please do share it with us.
    I guess that would be me to come forth with that info, Mike, since I am coming clean. I just want to say, that, while I am only an admirer of cyclists, I was inspired to get a bike only yesterday. Now, I am a "True Cyclist(R)!"

    Now that I am part of the family, can I expect forgiveness? Is there some punishment for pretending to be a cyclist?
    :confused:

  8. #8
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Pete Clark
    I just want to say, that, while I am only an admirer of cyclists, I was inspired to get a bike only yesterday. Now, I am a "True Cyclist(R)!"
    No so fast, Pete--I've just learned that a video clip on http://www.southerndepartmentstorevi...lancetapes.com shows you purchasing your so-called "bike" at a department store! What do you say to that?

  9. #9
    Little Debbie Fiend Club KevinG's Avatar
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    Who is Pete Clark?
    NADS #138
    Braaaaaaaaap!
    Go Medium Or Go HOME!!!!!
    Bob Roll:
    "Toour DAAAY Frantz!"

  10. #10
    Dances with Rocks Dirtgrinder's Avatar
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    It's funny you should bring this up now. I was wondering the same thing when I started the post "How often do you ride". How could a posting machine like Pete possibly have time to ride? I think perhaps he is just living vicariously through this forum.
    If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough...

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  11. #11
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Dirtgrinder
    I think perhaps he is just living vicariously through this forum.
    Thanks, Homer, uh, I mean, Dirtgrinder! You just gave me a GREAT idea: "Virtual Cycling."

    What with all that great Japanese technology available in the electronic game industry, not to mention the close second, American defense technology, we could make a jillion dollars on this idea. The user plugs into a virtual world via his game set and t.v., and he/she is in the Tour de France, or any cycling scenario desired. And get this:
    no bonking!

    Do you think cyclists might go for it? :confused:

  12. #12
    RAGBRAI. Need I say more? Steele-Bike's Avatar
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    Maybe all of us should hook our computers up to cyclo-generators. That way we would have to pedal if we wanted to surf the web. You would get the best of both worlds...computers and bikes.

  13. #13
    Dances with Rocks Dirtgrinder's Avatar
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    OK, I've finally figured it out. I've dug through the anal's of the internet and found this picture of Pete's bike. Now we know how he does it.
    If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough...

    To become a registered member of BikeForums Click Here

  14. #14
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Very smooth Pete. Maybe you could spare the change and buy all of US a wireless palm pilot, and then we would all have 500 whatever posts..

  15. #15
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    I know y'all are just stabbing in the dark! But since you must know, I have a basket on the front of my bike. In the basket I keep an ExtraTerrestrial with a laptop as we bike across the moon...

    Bike accidents are child's play now. I fall...10 maybe 15 hundred feet, and "Ouch!" Good thing Mr. E.T. has that light on the end of his finger.

    He drinks "Duff," but I don't really like him to. He sometimes forgets how to keep the bike in the air, and we end up in the top of some tree, spending the night.

    But now I'm rambling!

  16. #16
    riding a Pinarello Prince orguasch's Avatar
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    Pete,
    Please stop this nonsense, I know and you know that you are a true blooded cyclist,so why masquarade, that your not when you are a true cyclist in and all the way to you bones, Correct me if I am wrong, Pete!!!!!!!!!!!!
    "Racso", the well oiled machine;)

  17. #17
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Pete Clark
    But now I'm rambling!
    Hey, Pete, your number 600 post is coming up--probably will be long past by the time I get this posted...

  18. #18
    riding a Pinarello Prince orguasch's Avatar
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    JonR,
    leave the poor guy alone, and let him do all the posting he wants, thanx, buddy
    "Racso", the well oiled machine;)

  19. #19
    horizontally adapted bentrox!'s Avatar
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    Perhaps Pete Clark is not just a cyclist but rather multiple cyclists? Maybe some Atlanta area bicycling club shares a single "nom-de-plume" and password. Would that make it easier to believe 600+ postings in such a short time on virtually every subject in these Forums??? Just another rambling theory.
    Last edited by bentrox!; 05-19-01 at 02:37 PM.
    I'll gently rise and I'll softly call
    Good night and joy be with you all.

  20. #20
    Senior Member mike's Avatar
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    Pete Clark is more than just a bicyclist. He is a well rounded sportsman of many talents.

    Check out this pic of our "sumo champ" at his favorite winter sport:
    Mike

  21. #21
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    Of course, now that you've seen the "before" pictures, before I became a cyclist, check out me, "after," getting ready in the morning just after a hot shower:

    http://animation.acmecity.com/stopmo...mmercial02.jpg

  22. #22
    Dances with Rocks Dirtgrinder's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Pete Clark
    Of course, now that you've seen the "before" pictures, before I became a cyclist, check out me, "after," getting ready in the morning just after a hot shower:

    http://animation.acmecity.com/stopmo...mmercial02.jpg
    Oooohhhhhh Mama! Your almost as good lookin' as me, Johnny B!
    By the way Pete, Thanks for smackin' me around earlier; I feel much better now. :cool:
    If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough...

    To become a registered member of BikeForums Click Here

  23. #23
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Dirtgrinder
    Your almost as good lookin' as me, Johnny B!
    Now cut that out! No one, I mean, NO ONE is as pretty as me!

  24. #24
    Member Green Hornet's Avatar
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    How did a sumo wrestler get to be a cyclist?

    Looks like "Pete Clark" is out for a little "extra attention."

    Are there any REAL cyclists here? Geezy-peezy.

  25. #25
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Does anybody else notice that this thread questioning Pete's status as a cyclist keeps popping up?
    Pete, I'm afriad you'll have to provide hard evidense to clear this up dude.
    Booyah!!

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