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Old 04-27-01, 09:20 PM   #1
fubar5
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Today Lance Armstrong went in for a catscan for some unknown reason. What the Doctors found was terrible. Here's the story
Repoter] So what is wrong Doc?
Doc] Well, Lance's brain seems to be missing
Repoter] So what is in his head?
Doc] Well, it looks kinda like a bagel
Reporter] Bagel?
Doc] Yeah, my words exactly
Reporter#2] Chris, have you noticed anything strange about Lance?
Chris] Well, besides riding the Tour backwards, Lance just hasn't been like himself. All he can say is,"cream cheese" or "blueberry bagel". And this wierd toasted butter smell seems to come from him all the time
Reporter] How has it effected his riding?
Chris] Well, he doesn't seem focused. He goes into coffee shops all the time and gets bagels and Mocha
Reporter#2]Hmmm,What do you think about that story at the Tour broadcasted by Fritz Freeling and Mel Blanc?
Doc] Which one?
Reporter2] The one about some guys from...What was it Chris
Chris] I think BikeForums.com
Reporter2] Yeah!! that was it!! They transplanted his brain or something, in the snowy midwest...
Doc] Yeah I remember..
Chris] Why don't we get someone to go checkout that site and see if we can get any leadings...
Newscaster] We'll be right back after these messages..
TOMORROW, Don't miss the continued story of Lance Armstrong's wierd twist of fate...
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Old 04-28-01, 09:16 AM   #2
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Originally posted by fubar5
Today Lance Armstrong went in for a catscan for some unknown reason. What the Doctors found was terrible. Here's the story
Repoter] So what is wrong Doc?
Doc] Well, Lance's brain seems to be missing
Repoter] So what is in his head?
Doc] Well, it looks kinda like a bagel
Reporter] Bagel?
UPDATE: As you remember, Lance's brain is in safekeeping...in a Sumo wrestler's body.
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Old 04-28-01, 07:06 PM   #3
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Here we are with Quick News 47
Yesterday left off with someone going to investigate BF.com, here's the results
Reporter] So, what did you find out
Investigator] What I found was stunning
Chris] And what is that?
Investigator] Well,members at BF.com transplanted one of the user's brain into Lance's body, they thought they would set a Tour record
Reporter] They did didn't they
Reporter2] If you want to call riding the Tour backwards a record
Chris] Tell us more
Investigator] the user's name was Mike. So it seems that mike's body has Lance's brain, and Lance has Mike's brain.BUT, as noted yesterday Lance has a bagel not a brain.
Reporter2]So?
Investigator] Upon further investigation I found that a user Pete Clark accidentaly ate Lance's, no wait Mike's brain. And so instead of transplanting Mike's brain into Lance they transplanted Pete's bagel
Reporter] Hmmm, maybe that would explain Lance's obsession with bagels, what do you think Chris?
Chris]Probably so, who was the surgeon?
Investigator] It seems Mike peformed the operation himself, with the help of Racso.
Reporter2] So where does Pete come in?
Investigator] I guess he was watching
Reporter]Very strange. So Chris, what are you going to do?
Chris] I say we find this Mike guy and get Lance's brain back!!
Reporter] But what about Mike?
Chris]We'll give him Pete's brain
Reporter2]What about Pete?
Chris]Give'm a BAGEL!!! Har har hardy har har!!

Messages

Be sure to check in tomorrow for the latest on this intriguing story
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Old 04-28-01, 07:14 PM   #4
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Reporter] But what about Mike?
Chris]We'll give him Pete's brain
Fubar, I wonder if you might agree, Mike's been through enough already without getting MY brain...
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Old 04-28-01, 07:40 PM   #5
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Oh geez, we better get ahold of Chris..
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