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Thread: Self Defense

  1. #1
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Self Defense

    Last night was terrible. I was standing helplessly at the gas station putting gas in my parents car,when 3 KK's and a gallon of milk strolled up. They started walking around me in circles and tantalizing me with insults, bad ones too. I just laughed it off,but then they stole my wallet,and when I took it back my money was gone!!!!I said,"gimme back my money" and they siad"heck no boy!!" and started beating me up, so with no other way to defend myself, I ate the KK's and drank the milk. Agh, tragedy,tragedy!!!
    Booyah!!

  2. #2
    NOT a weight weenie Hunter's Avatar
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    Man, I am sorry to hear that. There are, short of New York, Mass., and Ca.. hand held close quarter weapons you can legaly carry. I would suggest you start thinking of these things. Short of that SWING YOUR BIKE AT THEM! Nothing would hurt worse short of a gun shot, then to be hit up side the head with a bike! You can also request that you train under the resident self defense instructor on base. You should be able to since your father is an officer. Another thing you can do is yell as loud as you can, and act as crazy as possible. Something like holding the gas pump and reaching for a lighter might have worked. Think about it.

  3. #3
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    Fubar, I think you may have infringed their constitutional rights. Eating your assailants is simply un-american.

  4. #4
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Originally posted by MichaelW
    Fubar, I think you may have infringed their constitutional rights. Eating your assailants is simply un-american.
    oops,
    Booyah!!

  5. #5
    BikeForums Founder Joe Gardner's Avatar
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    Dang thoes KK's!!

  6. #6
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Joe Gardner
    Dang thoes KK's!!
    Dern little pests. They attacked me again this morning.
    My mom went grocery shopping this morning, and some twinkies hid in the basket and came home with her, now they are hopping around at my feet while I type this very message!!!!
    Booyah!!

  7. #7
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    Vicious little beasts! And people think they're sweet....
    On leave of absence as of March 13, 2002. Contact by email.

  8. #8
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    "AAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

    the revenge of the eaten...

    Last edited by LittleBigMan; 06-27-01 at 04:53 PM.

  9. #9
    Life is good RonH's Avatar
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    At least it was only 3!!! The last time my wife and I drove by the place, they had the FRESH AND HOT sign on and my wife suggested we get a dozen.
    I was riding for two days straight to work that off.

    Next time they approach you ride away as fast as you can.
    My bikes --> 2001 Litespeed Tuscany---2011 Felt Z4

    Life is like a 10-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use. ~ Charles Schultz

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    Love Me....Love My Bike! aerobat's Avatar
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    And rumour has it that Canada will be invaded soon by those pesky devils, as if we didn't have enough of our own already!
    "...perhaps the world needs a little more Canada" - Jean Chretian, 2003.

  11. #11
    0^0 fubar5's Avatar
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    aah, ooh, get away!!! go!!! shoo you stinkers....aaaarhphhh,munch munch..."burp".
    Booyah!!

  12. #12
    Dances with Rocks Dirtgrinder's Avatar
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    It's a sad state of affairs when a man can't go into a gas station without worrying about being attacked by a bunch of rogue pastry.
    If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough...

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  13. #13
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    I've had Little Debbie chocolate-peanut bars jump into my grocery cart and lie concealed underneath the broccoli and brown rice and good stuff. At the checkout it would be too embarrassing to say "Put these back!" so I resign myself to paying for them, and to the torture that I know lies ahead...
    On leave of absence as of March 13, 2002. Contact by email.

  14. #14
    It's the fight in the man Rich's Avatar
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    So how comes you guys have all the fun...?

    I haven't been attacked by a pastry for...ohh, let me think...24 hours...

    It hurts man...it hurts...

    Rich :thumbup:
    Making New Zealand a safer place :)

  15. #15
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Rich
    So how comes you guys have all the fun...?

    I haven't been attacked by a pastry for...ohh, let me think...24 hours...

    It hurts man...it hurts...

    Rich :thumbup:
    It's a fact that English pastries are less aggressive than their American counterparts.
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  16. #16
    It's the fight in the man Rich's Avatar
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    I don't know Jon,

    There's been a sighting of a group of Cornish Pasties hanging out on the street corner wearing leathers and carrying flick knives...

    I certainly wouldn't mess...

    Rich
    Making New Zealand a safer place :)

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    My dear old Norwegian grandmother used to regale us with tales of those nasty Scandinavian breakfast pastries. Especially cunning were the evil skavals which slipped in from Denmark!
    Grump, aka Terry.

  18. #18
    Carfree since '82. Grrr! JonR's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Grump
    My dear old Norwegian grandmother used to regale us with tales of those nasty Scandinavian breakfast pastries. Especially cunning were the evil skavals which slipped in from Denmark!
    Those of us raised on Hans Christian Andersen never heard about that darker side of Nordic life....
    On leave of absence as of March 13, 2002. Contact by email.

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