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  1. #26
    opinionated SOB cycletourist's Avatar
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    UncaStuart,

    Your tinfoil skullcap should be paired with an "acceleration limitation device" (a string tied to the driver's big toe and right testicle). Use of this device should be required by all drivers under the age of 25.

  2. #27
    Every lane is a bike lane Chris L's Avatar
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    Originally posted by cycletourist
    UncaStuart,

    Your tinfoil skullcap should be paired with an "acceleration limitation device" (a string tied to the driver's big toe and right testicle). Use of this device should be required by all drivers under the age of 25.
    :thumbup: Good one Bob!
    "I am never going to flirt with idleness again" - Roy Keane
    "We invite everyone to question the entire culture we take for granted." - Manic Street Preachers.
    My blog.
    My bike tours. Japan tour page under construction.

  3. #28
    Sumanitu taka owaci LittleBigMan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by cycletourist
    UncaStuart,

    Your tinfoil skullcap should be paired with an "acceleration limitation device" (a string tied to the driver's big toe and right testicle). Use of this device should be required by all drivers under the age of 25.
    Dang!

    (I hope they never invent this for a bicycle!)
    No worries

  4. #29
    Sophomoric Member UncaStuart's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Pete Clark
    Dang!

    (I hope they never invent this for a bicycle!)
    Yes, in that case I would imagine that we'd see fewer articles on the benefits of spinning.

  5. #30
    Chicago Cyclist ViciousCycle's Avatar
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    My frame is covered in reflective tape. After adding ridiculously large handlebars, a comfy seat, and enough carrying capacity to haul a Thanksgiving grocery run home, the manufacturer wouldn't recognize it.
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    "Cyclists fight an ongoing war with
    guys in big trucks, and so many
    vehicles have hit me, so many times,
    in so many countries, I've lost count."
    --Lance Armstrong

    Perhaps this should be modified to:
    "Cyclists fight an ongoing war with
    guys with small penises, and so many
    vehicles have hit me, so many times,
    in so many countries, I've lost count."
    The Easter Island people were clever, but their civilization collapsed after they chopped down the last tree on their island. You can't be 'resourceful' if you've used up all of your resources.

  6. #31
    The Flying Scot chewa's Avatar
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    Custom 531c fast tourer/audax, 1964 Flying Scot Continental, 1995 Cinelli Supercorsa, Holdsworth Mistral single speed, Dahon Speed 6 (folder), Micmo Sirocco
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    "Sorry, my mistake. Thought this was a self help group"

    Chewa backs out of the room looking sheepish
    plus je vois les hommes, plus j'admire les chiens

    1985 Custom built 531c Audax/fast tourer.
    1964 Flying Scot Continental
    1995 Cinelli Supercorsa
    1980s Holdsworth Mistral fixed
    2005 Dahon Speed 6 (folder)
    (YES I LIKE STEEL)
    2008 Viking Saratoga tandem
    2008 Micmo Sirocco Hybrid (aluminium!)
    2012 BTwin Rockrider 8.1

  7. #32
    It's the fight in the man Rich's Avatar
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    What makes me worry even more is that my Mum says I have nothing to worry about!!!!!



    Rich
    Making New Zealand a safer place :)

  8. #33
    Senior Member MeHT's Avatar
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    Code:
    double v = this.vehicle.size();
    double p = this.penis.size();
    int iq = this.iq();
    int m = 0;
    int i;
    if (this.age()<25){
      while ((this.proximity(person(male, this.age+5, 10))!=null)||(this.proximity(person(male, this.age-5, 10))!=null)) {
        m++;
      **
      iq = (iq/m - v/p)*K; 
      /*K is found experimentally for each individual.*/
      **
    this.iq(iq);
    P.S.
    For every rule there is an exception.
    Prepare for the worst - that way any surprise will be a pleasant one.

  9. #34
    Member
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    dang! i thought i could get some advice about enlargening in here!

  10. #35
    Sprockette wabbit's Avatar
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    Actually, I've found that men are usually the honkers and yellers. They are usually:

    middle aged, pudgy men, often in large or luxury cars, who look as though they havent' walked more than a block in 25 years.

    -macho gumbas with their bimbo girlfriends or macho gumba buddies

    - greasy rednecks in beatup jalopies who yell stuff like "Get off the road with your toys!" while their rear bumper, held on with baling wire, dangles precariously off the back.

    However, elderly ladies honk, usually to warn you, which is fine since most of them can't drive or see very well. BUt recently, a middle aged woman honked and gave us the finger! This was on a 'shared road' so I gave her a huge bronx cheer and yelled at her to suck my crank.
    You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. That's great...if you want to attract vermin.

  11. #36
    Ride Nekkid! A.troll's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Campag Fetish Boy
    I thought this was a thread by someone who'd seen me out cycling naked again

    Oh! Someone else who rides nekkid! You are my kinda man! Wanna be my boyfriend, Campag Fetish Boy?

    So many men....so little time!

  12. #37
    Junior Member
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    Making a right turn into me and cutting me off..........$100

    Letting your dog run loose and knocking me off my bike.......$2800

    Cheering while we were watching a drunken woman getting handcuffed and arrested for wreckless driving after she deliberately tried to run your whole cycling club off the road.........priceless

    All true stories

    Cyclists can fight back!

  13. #38
    Junior Member
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    Hi Campag boyo
    Sure you weren't chasing sheep when you were riding in the buff?
    The older I get the more I realise that this is not a rehearsal!

  14. #39
    Not so Senior Member Eureka's Avatar
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    One boy, one brain.
    Two boys, half a brain
    Three or more boys, no brain at all.

  15. #40
    Senior Member
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    Yer the man Chris!

    Your thread title and the subsequent replys have cheered me up know-end

    A brilliant antidote to the depression i have slumped into over the last few days, what with lousy weather stopping me riding ,job problems. Looking at this thread has made me laugh again in the first time for days.

  16. #41
    Senior Member
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    Other than the driver of the green chrysler mini van who very nearly ran me into a parked car and then layed on the horn for me to get out of the road, I don't experience much harrassment. I guess being 6'2" and 220 pounds helps with this . I don't let them get me down and for the most part, the drivers seem to be pretty friendly.
    A man's actions influence his attitude as much as his attitude influences his actions.

  17. #42
    It tastes like burning! deliriou5's Avatar
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    LOL.... before it put up this post, the heading read:

    Thread: Small penis syndrome Last Post: Big Johnson

    The only true knowledge is knowing that you know nothing - Socrates

    Back on the bike!!

  18. #43
    Ride Nekkid! A.troll's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Omalley21145
    dang! i thought i could get some advice about enlargening in here!
    Don't worry, Omalley. Size really doesn't matter. At least not to me.


    Of course, I am only five inches tall.
    So many men....so little time!

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