Corollary to Rule #5:
This rule does not apply to those in a position to do oneself grievous physical harm, including martial arts masters, student system administrators, and the first-born children of senior Mafia members.
And a few to add:
When calling a guy/girl to ask them out:
If they do not respond within five seconds of, "So, do you want to go to see the Puking Electric Voltaires on Saturday?" you are S.O.L. Accept defeat, and move on. It is the way of the Tao that the person on the other end of the line is more interested in playing with their twenty-year old Gumby than going out on a date with you.
When working on a bicycle:
Contemplate the bike for five seconds before taking off on a "test ride" up the Himalayas to viset Tibet. This way, you will gain valuable insight into the nature of the universe, you will restore the energy of body and mind, and you will notice the set of brake cables which you forgot to reconnect.
If you drop the filet mignon, er, Swanson's Salsbury Steak dinner on the floor, it is acceptable to eat providing two of the three conditions are met:
1. It has been on the ground less than five seconds.
2. It is not being consumed by you.
3. It is not being consumed by someone who provides you with, or from whom you would wish to obtain, free sex.