Cycling and bicycle discussion forums. 
   Click here to join our community Log in to access your Control Panel  


Go Back   > >

Living Car Free Do you live car free or car light? Do you prefer to use alternative transportation (bicycles, walking, other human-powered or public transportation) for everyday activities whenever possible? Discuss your lifestyle here.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 02-23-08, 01:21 AM   #1
bragi
bragi
Thread Starter
 
bragi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: seattle, WA
Bikes: LHT
Posts: 2,911
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
,,

Last edited by bragi; 02-23-08 at 01:36 AM.
bragi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 01:43 AM   #2
Six jours
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Bikes:
Posts: 6,401
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yes. It's hard to find a woman that stupid.

Thanks for asking!
Six jours is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 09:28 AM   #3
cerewa
put our Heads Together
 
cerewa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: southeast pennsylvania
Bikes: a mountain bike with a cargo box on the back and aero bars on the front. an old well-worn dahon folding bike
Posts: 3,155
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
I assure you, marriage and being car-free were never thought to be in conflict with each other before 100 years ago.
cerewa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 10:18 AM   #4
Artkansas 
Pedaled too far.
 
Artkansas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: La Petite Roche
Bikes:
Posts: 12,858
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Well, it depends on whether she wants to be car free. Otherwise the best you can do is car lite as a couple. But that's not bad either.

When I was married she got a nicer car because we didn't have to support two cars, and I got to use it when necessary.

And at one point she was pressuring me to get a car as well because she was concerned about various imagined dangers that I faced. I had her do the math and she discovered that if I bought a car our budget would go from in the black to in the red.
__________________
"He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
Artkansas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 12:18 PM   #5
dwainedibbly
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: northern Florida, USA
Bikes:
Posts: 778
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Marriage can be at odds with a lot of things. It just depends on the marriage.
dwainedibbly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 01:56 PM   #6
bragi
bragi
Thread Starter
 
bragi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: seattle, WA
Bikes: LHT
Posts: 2,911
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I brought up the subject of going totally car-free a couple of times, and every time, the debates were brief and to the point ("I said no and quit bugging me about it, ecofreak.") She's totally fine with me being car-free, the only problem is, with her tendency to prefer having the car, I'm not really car-free any more, either. When we go places together, which, being a couple, is fairly frequently, we almost always go by car. In principle, she agrees that we should use bikes for shorter trips (she has two bikes of her own), but in practice, it's too late, too cold, too rainy, too far, we're wearing nicer clothes (or rather, she's wearing nicer clothes), etc. I don't want to be a dogmatic jerk about it, so I tend to give in on this issue, but it does sort of irritate me; I'm not fond of cars or their effects on our quality of life, think they're mostly unnecessary in an urban area, and would like to have the gas money for other things. I'm just wondering how other people manage this issue.
bragi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 02:07 PM   #7
fordfasterr
One speed: FAST !
 
fordfasterr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Ft. Lauderdale FL
Bikes: Ebay Bikes... =)
Posts: 3,375
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bragi View Post
I brought up the subject of going totally car-free a couple of times, and every time, the debates were brief and to the point ("I said no and quit bugging me about it, ecofreak.") She's totally fine with me being car-free, the only problem is, with her tendency to prefer having the car, I'm not really car-free any more, either. When we go places together, which, being a couple, is fairly frequently, we almost always go by car. In principle, she agrees that we should use bikes for shorter trips (she has two bikes of her own), but in practice, it's too late, too cold, too rainy, too far, we're wearing nicer clothes (or rather, she's wearing nicer clothes), etc. I don't want to be a dogmatic jerk about it, so I tend to give in on this issue, but it does sort of irritate me; I'm not fond of cars or their effects on our quality of life, think they're mostly unnecessary in an urban area, and would like to have the gas money for other things. I'm just wondering how other people manage this issue.

Thats basically exactly the same issue with my wife and I.

Carry on.
fordfasterr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 02:13 PM   #8
Platy
Dare to be weird!
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Austin TX
Bikes: Hybridized 1970s Coppi road bike; Townie city cruiser
Posts: 1,991
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bragi View Post
...I'm just wondering how other people manage this issue.
I'm in a similar situation. Compromise and a practical attitude about the whole carfree thing works for me and my partner.
Platy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 03:46 PM   #9
Artkansas 
Pedaled too far.
 
Artkansas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: La Petite Roche
Bikes:
Posts: 12,858
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Marriage is a compromise of course. She's stated her position and knows yours. And it sounds like you have achieved the median value there. So relax. Take a bike ride and faggedaboutit. Even as it is, you use cars less and burn less gas and money on cars than the average. You're at the optimum even if you don't know it.
__________________
"He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.

Last edited by Artkansas; 02-23-08 at 07:50 PM.
Artkansas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 06:43 PM   #10
rockmom
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Bikes:
Posts: 270
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My husband and I are on the same page as far as car free goes. But like any relationship, there is compromise. Sometimes we just have to go with the solution that is 'good enough' for both of us rather one person's ideal.
rockmom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 09:51 PM   #11
gerv 
In the right lane
 
gerv's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Des Moines
Bikes: 1974 Huffy 3 speed
Posts: 9,531
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Marriage does really mirror your situation in a society. For example, I would probably become both car-free and vegetarian if left to my own devices. However, my wife (like a lot of other individuals in my society...) eats meat and I would like to share meals with her. Therefore, my decision is to prepare as many vegetarians meals as I can without getting dogmatic about it. Likewise, I don't insist on living in a carfree household. What I do instead is use my bicycle for the transportation that makes sense and try to avoid labels like "carfree" and "vegetarian" when discussing either meals or transportation options with my wife. I think that we both will eventually move in the direction of "carfree" and "vegetarian" as our society evolves. I believe my grandchildren will adopt both exclusively. I am merely setting the stage for them.
gerv is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-08, 10:36 PM   #12
thelung
...
 
thelung's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: hell
Bikes: some piece of s h i t
Posts: 750
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Depends who you marry. And if you want a different lifestyle than your partner maybe you shouldnt marry them.
thelung is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 03:13 AM   #13
Cyclaholic
CRIKEY!!!!!!!
 
Cyclaholic's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Sydney, Australia
Bikes: several
Posts: 4,270
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 68 Post(s)
Ah, now I get it. You left out "My" from the beginning of the thread title.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bragi View Post
I brought up the subject of going totally car-free a couple of times, and every time, the debates were brief and to the point ("I said no and quit bugging me about it, ecofreak.") She's totally fine with me being car-free, the only problem is, with her tendency to prefer having the car, I'm not really car-free any more, either. When we go places together, which, being a couple, is fairly frequently, we almost always go by car. In principle, she agrees that we should use bikes for shorter trips (she has two bikes of her own), but in practice, it's too late, too cold, too rainy, too far, we're wearing nicer clothes (or rather, she's wearing nicer clothes), etc. I don't want to be a dogmatic jerk about it, so I tend to give in on this issue, but it does sort of irritate me; I'm not fond of cars or their effects on our quality of life, think they're mostly unnecessary in an urban area, and would like to have the gas money for other things. I'm just wondering how other people manage this issue.

Would she just give in and ride if you said to her "I said we're riding and quit bugging me about it, you enviro-nazi"?
Cyclaholic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 09:19 AM   #14
bike2math
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Texas
Bikes:
Posts: 959
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bragi View Post
I brought up the subject of going totally car-free a couple of times, and every time, the debates were brief and to the point ("I said no and quit bugging me about it, ecofreak.") She's totally fine with me being car-free, the only problem is, with her tendency to prefer having the car, I'm not really car-free any more, either. When we go places together, which, being a couple, is fairly frequently, we almost always go by car. In principle, she agrees that we should use bikes for shorter trips (she has two bikes of her own), but in practice, it's too late, too cold, too rainy, too far, we're wearing nicer clothes (or rather, she's wearing nicer clothes), etc. I don't want to be a dogmatic jerk about it, so I tend to give in on this issue, but it does sort of irritate me; I'm not fond of cars or their effects on our quality of life, think they're mostly unnecessary in an urban area, and would like to have the gas money for other things. I'm just wondering how other people manage this issue.
Basically my experience also. Except my wife always points out my beer drinking when I mention saving money on gas and insurance. The hard part is keeping myself from forming the habit of using the car for my solo trips, particularly errands I don't really want to do. On the plus side she takes the bus to work and I bike, so the car does only get driven for errands and doctors appointments.

I've pointed out to her that in our lifetimes gasoline will probably become prohibitvely expensive (I think it already is, but..); she says, "I don't want to worry about it". Absolutely frightening.
bike2math is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 09:48 AM   #15
Artkansas 
Pedaled too far.
 
Artkansas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: La Petite Roche
Bikes:
Posts: 12,858
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by thelung View Post
if you want a different lifestyle than your partner maybe you shouldnt marry them.
Easier said than done.
__________________
"He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
Artkansas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 10:46 AM   #16
bragi
bragi
Thread Starter
 
bragi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: seattle, WA
Bikes: LHT
Posts: 2,911
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyclaholic View Post
Ah, now I get it. You left out "My" from the beginning of the thread title.




Would she just give in and ride if you said to her "I said we're riding and quit bugging me about it, you enviro-nazi"?
No, I don't think she would. Nor will she iron my shirt and bring me beers while I lounge on the couch, watching football games in my boxers.
bragi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 07:53 PM   #17
Dahon.Steve
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: New Jersey
Bikes:
Posts: 6,826
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 23 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bragi View Post
,,
Marriage is not at odds with being car free if your living in China or Africa. I find the more educated and higher earning the female, the less likely she is willing to be car free or even marry someone who is.
Dahon.Steve is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 08:19 PM   #18
rockmom
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Bikes:
Posts: 270
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dahon.Steve View Post
Marriage is not at odds with being car free if your living in China or Africa. I find the more educated and higher earning the female, the less likely she is willing to be car free or even marry someone who is.
Really? I live in a city that has an unusually high number of people with college and higher degrees. Car free and car-lite are both more popular than when I lived in places with a more typical spectrum of educational backgrounds.

Car free women are most definitely out there.

http://americancity.org/article.php?id_article=217
rockmom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 08:35 PM   #19
Trucker_JDub
Senior Member
 
Trucker_JDub's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Bikes:
Posts: 300
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Artkansas View Post
Easier said than done.
Actually its very easy. If you think to your self 'this person doesn't hold the same level of importance to the things that are important in my life and they may never understand why I am the way I am' then you move on and find someone else. Never settle for anything less then what you want. There is nothing wrong with being single if you can't find the right person for you. If you settle you will never be truly happy.
Trucker_JDub is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 10:28 PM   #20
Artkansas 
Pedaled too far.
 
Artkansas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: La Petite Roche
Bikes:
Posts: 12,858
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trucker_JDub View Post
Actually its very easy. If you think to your self 'this person doesn't hold the same level of importance to the things that are important in my life and they may never understand why I am the way I am' then you move on and find someone else. Never settle for anything less then what you want. There is nothing wrong with being single if you can't find the right person for you. If you settle you will never be truly happy.

But what if you meet that wonderful person who pushes all your buttons right, but they just don't happen to be car free. You may be giving up an awful lot for that one point. No matter how you choose, in some ways you will settle.

It's the old story about looking for the perfect woman and you find her, but she rejects you because she is looking for the perfect man. No one is perfect, or perfect for you. Coupling at its very essence is about compromise. Compromise is settling.
__________________
"He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
Artkansas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 10:55 PM   #21
Newspaperguy
Senior Member
 
Newspaperguy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Bikes:
Posts: 2,206
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Artkansas View Post
But what if you meet that wonderful person who pushes all your buttons right, but they just don't happen to be car free. You may be giving up an awful lot for that one point. No matter how you choose, in some ways you will settle.
Brilliant.

As I continue to search for a partner, there are only a few things that are deal-breakers for me. These have to do with core values and character. They also would quickly get in the way of a happy relationship for both of us.
Newspaperguy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-24-08, 11:01 PM   #22
Roody
Sophomoric Member
 
Roody's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Dancing in Lansing
Bikes:
Posts: 23,389
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 36 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Artkansas View Post
But what if you meet that wonderful person who pushes all your buttons right, but they just don't happen to be car free. You may be giving up an awful lot for that one point. No matter how you choose, in some ways you will settle.

It's the old story about looking for the perfect woman and you find her, but she rejects you because she is looking for the perfect man. No one is perfect, or perfect for you. Coupling at its very essence is about compromise. Compromise is settling
.
Yeah... I'm pretty hardcore but I wouldn't let a car stand between me and somebody I love.
__________________

"Think Outside the Cage"
Roody is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-08, 09:35 AM   #23
acroy
Senior Member
 
acroy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Dallas Suburbpopolis
Bikes:
Posts: 1,480
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roody View Post
Yeah... I'm pretty hardcore but I wouldn't let a car stand between me and somebody I love.
Yep - we all have our price
acroy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-08, 03:47 PM   #24
gwd
Biker
 
gwd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: DC
Bikes: one Recumbent and one Utility Bike
Posts: 1,917
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm hoping to marry a currently car dependent suburbanite. We haven't talked about the car free thing as an issue. My plan is to just do together what I did with my own life, make decisions in the car free and simple life direction and see where we end up. Since she grew up car free, it isn't so weird to her as it might be to someone who grew up car dependent.
gwd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-08, 10:43 PM   #25
Artkansas 
Pedaled too far.
 
Artkansas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: La Petite Roche
Bikes:
Posts: 12,858
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by gwd View Post
I'm hoping to marry a currently car dependent suburbanite. We haven't talked about the car free thing as an issue. My plan is to just do together what I did with my own life, make decisions in the car free and simple life direction and see where we end up. Since she grew up car free, it isn't so weird to her as it might be to someone who grew up car dependent.
Congratulations and all the best.
__________________
"He who serves all, best serves himself" Jack London

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
Artkansas is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:33 PM.