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  1. #1
    Senior Member CranxOC's Avatar
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    OK, so "they" (I have to admit, I don't know who "they" are but "they" seem to be the source of a lot of information...even if a lot of it's wrong ) say that you're supposed to look for the "silver lining in every dark cloud;" well, I found the silver lining in the dark clouds (or should I say swarms) that are the gnats that hover around my friggin face every time I get onto a long climb and that dark cloud is anger.

    Today I was so peeved by the fact that I had a swarm of gnats hovering around my face (which means that I literally inhaled close to 20 of those friggin things - I believe they're growing inside my chest, waiting to pop out like the creatures in the movie "Aliens") and buzzing in my flippin' ears that I wound up climbing one of my semi-regular climbs faster than I ever believe I've climbed it before.

    I was trying to get the heck away from the stupid bugs by pedalling faster than they could fly and, in doing so, I wound up blazing the hill.

    So, even though gnats are still the second most annoying (the first would be the 10 billion ants that live somewhere under my house who come out to ruin my food every time I think I'm safe ) creatures on the face of the Earth, at least they served some sort of useful purpose on my ride tonight.

    BTW, bug spray just seems to attract those little suckers more!
    Last edited by CranxOC; 07-25-05 at 11:15 AM.
    "If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts." - Albert Einstein

  2. #2
    Canon fiend MadMan2k's Avatar
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    Maybe you can ride when it's too hot out for them... Flying bugs are annoying, but luckily we haven't had many around here this year. I know what you mean about the ants though.

  3. #3
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    I live in S.C. so I feel your pain when it comes to annoying flying insects. I call them "Teeth With Wings".
    However...if they motivated you to climb like never before, maybe you should trap some in a plastic bag and tie that over your head before your next climb....but then you'll have the whole "restricted breathing" delimma. Decisons, decisions.

  4. #4
    Senior Member CranxOC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BErad
    I live in S.C. so I feel your pain when it comes to annoying flying insects. I call them "Teeth With Wings".
    However...if they motivated you to climb like never before, maybe you should trap some in a plastic bag and tie that over your head before your next climb....but then you'll have the whole "restricted breathing" delimma. Decisons, decisions.
    Nice! I'm not sure about the whole "plastic bag" thing but, as far as the gnats go, maybe I'll adopt some as pets!
    "If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts." - Albert Einstein

  5. #5
    Just give'er. hooligan's Avatar
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    Hold your breath when you see their swarms. Many bugs detect by carbon dioxide traces. Try to blast into them as opposed to slowing down or anything.

  6. #6
    Senior Member CranxOC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hooligan
    Hold your breath when you see their swarms. Many bugs detect by carbon dioxide traces. Try to blast into them as opposed to slowing down or anything.
    Holding your breath and "blasting" through them can be a somewhat difficult proposition on a hill that averages a greater than 10% gradient. I'm pretty sure that if I took your advice I'd pass out and be eaten alive by the little bastards.
    "If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts." - Albert Einstein

  7. #7
    Senior Member Dinstee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CranxOC
    Holding your breath and "blasting" through them can be a somewhat difficult proposition on a hill that averages a greater than 10% gradient. I'm pretty sure that if I took your advice I'd pass out and be eaten alive by the little bastards.

    And don't forget the ants that would come along for the feast!
    Yeah, I've been on your wheel for a good long time. I'll be more than happy to pull us all if you'd just slow down a bit. ;)

  8. #8
    Senior Member CranxOC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dinstee
    And don't forget the ants that would come along for the feast!
    Oh man! If someone ever asks "what's the worst death that you can imagine..." I now have a new one!
    "If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts." - Albert Einstein

  9. #9
    Just give'er. hooligan's Avatar
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    Here's another, used during old times in China. Being thrown into a giant kettle of burning oil, or getting cut in half.

    Anywho, I didn't know you were talking about that on the hill. Sorry. Heh.

  10. #10
    Digs technical steeps
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    Perhaps spread peanut butter on your face before you ride. The gnats would stick to the peanut butter instead of going up your nose or down your throat and you could scrape the whole works off with a piece of bread at the end of the run for a nice sandwich.

    I thought gnats were bad until I almost ran over a snake on the trail last week. I'm not afraid of snakes but it startled me so much when it slithered off the trail right in front of me I almost crashed!
    'My other bike is a bike.'

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