Roflmao!!!!
04-30-04, 06:09 PM
#1
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Roflmao!!!!
This is one that caused me to spit my drink up. It is true and the rider it happend to is one of our local riders. No names though to protect the girly-man.
"OK, before there are any misconceptions or hurt feelings, let me tell the quick story:
I go for a ride in Whiting yesterday, starting at 6:35pm. Beautiful weather, sun is shining, cool breeze, I'm feeling my lack of conditioning, but my newly broken finger isn't bothering me too badly. Just riding along, I thought about the fact that I never ride XC and that I need to do more rides that don't involve me impaling myself into the ground. Then I laughed and realized I say this every single week and that I will likely never change.
Anyway, on I go, thinking a bit about Mark and how this is the first time I've ridden Whiting since the lion attacks. I was riding probably within 20-30yards of where Mark's attack took place when I went to shift my front chainring and ended up dropping a chain. I tried to upshift to the big ring and pedal out of it, but the chain had caught on my lower pivot.
I dismounted.
I walked my bike as close to a tree as I could get, put my back to the tree, and held my bike up in the air with one hand while re-seating the chain with the other. I whistled a bit, talked aloud, said "hey lions, don"t eat me, I taste bad!" OK, no problem, I got the chain back on with one hand after a few attempts, and I was about ready to resume my ride. I set the bike down, reach down to spin the crank once with my hand before mounting the bike, when I hear a sudden noise.
It was the noise of a charging beast, of a killer predator hungry for a meal. The sound of a... of a... another rider. He stopped and asked, while laughing hysterically, "did you think I was a cougar or something?" I said, uh, umm, yeah goddamnit! Then I paused...why is he laughing so hard? I figured it out quickly. I had yelled, no I had ROARED a tremedously deep and powerful roar that scared away the lion just before the rider appeared...yeah, that's it... umm, no.
I actually had let out quite a yell, but I fear the yell was more of a yelp, and the noise was a couple octaves higher than my normal voice. Oh good god, I screamed like a girl.
Well, we had a good laugh about it and rode the rest of the way together. I did take some satisfaction when he wiped out on the fireroad in a patch of deep sand he'd hit at about 25mph...serves him right for scaring me *****less."
"OK, before there are any misconceptions or hurt feelings, let me tell the quick story:
I go for a ride in Whiting yesterday, starting at 6:35pm. Beautiful weather, sun is shining, cool breeze, I'm feeling my lack of conditioning, but my newly broken finger isn't bothering me too badly. Just riding along, I thought about the fact that I never ride XC and that I need to do more rides that don't involve me impaling myself into the ground. Then I laughed and realized I say this every single week and that I will likely never change.
Anyway, on I go, thinking a bit about Mark and how this is the first time I've ridden Whiting since the lion attacks. I was riding probably within 20-30yards of where Mark's attack took place when I went to shift my front chainring and ended up dropping a chain. I tried to upshift to the big ring and pedal out of it, but the chain had caught on my lower pivot.
I dismounted.
I walked my bike as close to a tree as I could get, put my back to the tree, and held my bike up in the air with one hand while re-seating the chain with the other. I whistled a bit, talked aloud, said "hey lions, don"t eat me, I taste bad!" OK, no problem, I got the chain back on with one hand after a few attempts, and I was about ready to resume my ride. I set the bike down, reach down to spin the crank once with my hand before mounting the bike, when I hear a sudden noise.
It was the noise of a charging beast, of a killer predator hungry for a meal. The sound of a... of a... another rider. He stopped and asked, while laughing hysterically, "did you think I was a cougar or something?" I said, uh, umm, yeah goddamnit! Then I paused...why is he laughing so hard? I figured it out quickly. I had yelled, no I had ROARED a tremedously deep and powerful roar that scared away the lion just before the rider appeared...yeah, that's it... umm, no.
I actually had let out quite a yell, but I fear the yell was more of a yelp, and the noise was a couple octaves higher than my normal voice. Oh good god, I screamed like a girl.
Well, we had a good laugh about it and rode the rest of the way together. I did take some satisfaction when he wiped out on the fireroad in a patch of deep sand he'd hit at about 25mph...serves him right for scaring me *****less."
04-30-04, 06:28 PM
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O.k, I'm nominating this story as the funniest of 2004!
That's frikin hilarious! I could imagine myself roaring and realizing I was screaming like a girly girl!
Thanks DBD, I needed a good laugh!
L8R
That's frikin hilarious! I could imagine myself roaring and realizing I was screaming like a girly girl!
Thanks DBD, I needed a good laugh!
L8R
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"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, "WOW, What a Ride!" - unknown
"Your Bike Sucks" - Sky Yaeger
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, "WOW, What a Ride!" - unknown
"Your Bike Sucks" - Sky Yaeger
