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  1. #1
    huffy and magna 4 life
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    damn.. broke my new bike

    So i was riding my sweet magna full suspension that i picked up from wal-mart on these local trails. I was tearing those trails up all over the place, gettin sideways in the twisties, you know that kind of stuff. I came upon a few of these girls that were hiking that I recognized from the trailer park. I really think they're both pretty hot and i wanted to impress them so i decided to launch off this 10' foot drop right in front of them. I tried pulling a sick tail whip just like i see those cool guys riding those santa cruz and jamis bikes. But the backend came around and I was gettin sideways like a flat tracker. So there I am floating through the air, hot chicks watching the whole thing, and bang. Impact! Good thing I was wearing my new cycling gloves I just got cause my hands took most of the impact and I rolled over on my back and slid into the brush. The girls came out to see if I was ok so I had to play it cool and try not to cry. I got a hole in my new jean shorts and scraped up my raiders jacket, but other than that and a bruised knee I'm ok. Just be careful out there guys, I could have gotten really hurt. As for the magna, well...it crushed that rear spring like a soda can, totally ripped my rear derailer right off the bike and i bent my front rim. I don't think i'll be able to ride her for awhile, or atleast until i get those parts fixed. But i think i might be able to rig something up. My mom has an old mattress in the shed behind the trailer, and i might be able to take one of those springs and use a screen door damper to build a new one. I'll keep you guys informed. Keep er' up right.
    the goat

  2. #2
    I drink your MILKSHAKE Raiyn's Avatar
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    Holy troll bait Batman

  3. #3
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear about the jeanshorts.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  4. #4
    Aut Vincere Aut Mori Snuffleupagus's Avatar
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    My first bike when I was a kid was a Magna!

    Magna for life

  5. #5
    Senior Member
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    What a tool

  6. #6
    Banned.
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    Quote Originally Posted by the goat
    So i was riding my sweet magna full suspension that i picked up from wal-mart on these local trails. I was tearing those trails up all over the place, gettin sideways in the twisties, you know that kind of stuff. I came upon a few of these girls that were hiking that I recognized from the trailer park. I really think they're both pretty hot and i wanted to impress them so i decided to launch off this 10' foot drop right in front of them. I tried pulling a sick tail whip just like i see those cool guys riding those santa cruz and jamis bikes. But the backend came around and I was gettin sideways like a flat tracker. So there I am floating through the air, hot chicks watching the whole thing, and bang. Impact! Good thing I was wearing my new cycling gloves I just got cause my hands took most of the impact and I rolled over on my back and slid into the brush. The girls came out to see if I was ok so I had to play it cool and try not to cry. I got a hole in my new jean shorts and scraped up my raiders jacket, but other than that and a bruised knee I'm ok. Just be careful out there guys, I could have gotten really hurt. As for the magna, well...it crushed that rear spring like a soda can, totally ripped my rear derailer right off the bike and i bent my front rim. I don't think i'll be able to ride her for awhile, or atleast until i get those parts fixed. But i think i might be able to rig something up. My mom has an old mattress in the shed behind the trailer, and i might be able to take one of those springs and use a screen door damper to build a new one. I'll keep you guys informed. Keep er' up right.
    the goat

    What a coincidence. Had the same thing happen last week. Fortunately, i haulded her back into Walmart and the Greeter at the front door whipped out a Park Tool Kit from under his Blue Smock and fixed me right up.

    So it's me and my Magna heading back for the trail. Hang in there new forum member. It is a pleasure to have you aboard. It is always exciting to make your first post on BF. Can you remember back far enough to remember when that was???

  7. #7
    Immoderator KrisPistofferson's Avatar
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    It's satire. This guy's spelling and grammar are WAY too good. He's one of us using an alias to have a bit of fun. But this'll still turn into a Wally World bike thread...
    Quote Originally Posted by Bikeforums
    Your rights end where another poster's feelings begin.

  8. #8
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    Yeah but finding a really good pair of replacemnt jean shorts is really tough.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  9. #9
    Hucker Extraordinare BigHit-Maniac's Avatar
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    You do realize.... you need a mullet, crooked teeth, and a wife-beater to impress those ladies right?


    Got Nine Inches ? Cuz I do. http://67.19.50.55/forums/images/smilies/eviltongue.gif

    AIM: MtnBikeHucker

  10. #10
    Senior Member
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    Don't forget the 6 pack of Miller High Life cans...

  11. #11
    I drink your MILKSHAKE Raiyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by trekkie820
    Don't forget the 6 pack of Miller High Life cans...
    Not High Life! Trailer trash drinks the BEAST Milwaukee's Best.

  12. #12
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    This thread has been



    Derailed.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  13. #13
    I drink your MILKSHAKE Raiyn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KonaRider24
    This thread has been



    Derailed.
    Amtrak stirkes again.

  14. #14
    Senior Member swifferman's Avatar
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    Amtrak rules...

  15. #15
    Old School Rad mtnbiker66's Avatar
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    The conductor had a sixpack of Miller low life.
    Like a circus monkey on a stolen Harley......

  16. #16
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by swifferman
    Amtrak rules...
    amtrak sucks so bad. when your 5:30am train (that you woke up at 3:45 for) is 6 HOURS LATE TO THE STATION you kinda get turned off of a company.

  17. #17
    Senior Member incipit's Avatar
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    Wouldn't the Mod just be able to look at his IP address...should come up with a match if that's the case...

    The whole time I was reading that post I was thinking the exact same thing... the direct references to Walmart and such, adding the girls for drama... It could be a sincere post but I highly doubt it.
    '03 Trek 4500, Marzocchi MX Comp ETA, Avid mechs w/flak Jackets, Shimano XT Deraillers, XT Hubs w/Rhynolites

  18. #18
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    I did do the tracing, I just can't post them here.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  19. #19
    Aut Vincere Aut Mori Snuffleupagus's Avatar
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    Pure satire

    I'd eat my shoe, as well as all of yours if this post was serious.

  20. #20
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Snuffleupagus
    Pure satire

    I'd eat my shoe, as well as all of yours if this post was serious.
    You sure; my shoes stink.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  21. #21
    Aut Vincere Aut Mori Snuffleupagus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KonaRider24
    You sure; my shoes stink.

    Pretty sure. As long as I've got some barbecue sauce it's ok

  22. #22
    huffy and magna 4 life
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    if you guys think this is a joke i dare you to come out to my parts and see for yourself. just cause i don't have one of them fancy bikes like ya'll don't mean i can't ride. I bet i'd leave all you guys in my dust. and as for snuffleupagus, i got some old british knight shoes that i got duct tapped to my pedals that smell pretty bad that you can eat. I can't afford clipless so i had to rig something up...just like the goat likes to do. any ways i better be off, i got to go work on the old magna. i've got an idea to rig my grandpa's shoe horn up with some bailing wire and a coat hanger to make me a new derailer. the shoe horn will sit underneath the chain and when i pull up on the wire which is welded to it, it'll lift the chain up and i can set it on what sprocket i want. i'll let you guys know if it works. i gotta go, my mom is coming home from the factory and she's gonna take me to the night shift at the grocery store. See ya'll later.
    The goat

  23. #23
    ÖöÖöÖöÖöÖö Dannihilator's Avatar
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    Actually, alot of us you would get dropped quickly.
    Strike like an eagle and sacrifice the dove.
    Words and Stuff.

  24. #24
    Old School Rad mtnbiker66's Avatar
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    Someone set this up "24 hours of the trailer park". The winner would get a gold shoehorn and a one way amtrak ticket.Where would we run it?
    Like a circus monkey on a stolen Harley......

  25. #25
    Humaniod Typhoon -Stretch-'s Avatar
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    buttf*ck idaho....thats where the "24 hours or trailer park" can be held....
    04 specialized hardrock xc with eggbeater sl pedals
    ________________________

    "Blast oxygen mask smoke filled cockpit, depressurize, dont be afraid hold onto me, were going down but not our love. Death dont seem so bad when im with you, my only love, so close your eyes, kiss me one last time, were gonna die, but not our lovee"- NOFX, Falling in love.

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