pseudobrit

Racing.

The heart of the Fred problem lies in Fred's ignorance of how much he sucks and the resultant self-loathing that follows the realisation of that ineptitude.

The average American wouldn't bother getting their heart rate above 170 even if there was an orgasm involved, so the nascent roadie is superior indeed in the context of the general public. And this is where it gets dangerous. Because it's one thing to know you're better than most of the average ******bags out there and another entirely to think for a split second that you might actually be any good at this sport.

I've been there myself, perhaps, on the brink. I'd just done the Death Ride the month before and had plenty of long-mileage riding under my belt that season. People thought I was nuts for how much I rode, and I took it to heart. I started to think I might be pretty good at it, because how many people can finish the Death Ride? Then I jumped into a local race. Showed up, got my one day license and lined up.

I went OTB on the second climb. Shattered the illusions. Damn, I'm awful. And fat.

You'll learn to love to hate yourself, acquire a borderline eating disorder and obsess over expensive and fashionable gear because you know it's the only thing you can put on your bike that won't be an embarrassment.

Freds and Fred apologists fail to accept and embrace their inadequacy, and this is their fatal flaw. They start to think that either they're good enough at this or that it doesn't matter if they're not good. And from there, it's only a short jump to justifying that helmet mirror and getting excited when Nashbar has club-cut sleeveless jerseys on sale.

Get to it, Freds. https://www.usacycling.org/events/index.php?race=Road

drainyoo

oh boy.

blonduathlongrl

wanders

Me. OTB on the first climb. No illusions to be shattered. Awfuller and fatter than you.

pseudobrit

We haven't had enough Fredanalysis this week.

pseudobrit

Yes. Say it loud and proud. Your hate will set you free.

explody pup

So, to put it simply, your cycling is fueled by insecurity and the need to prove your value relative to others.

I appreciate the sentiment and the tongue-in-cheek humor (even as tired as it already is, this forum seems to love repeating the same jokes), but I get on a bike to get away from other people. I haven't yet found a good enough reason to betray that motive.

wanders

3.0lb/in - eat up, tiny.

lachlanbike

I agree. I have just registered to compete in my first race and I am only just beginning to comprehend the depth of my recent fredness.

pseudobrit

No. You've got it completely backwards.

My cycling is fueled by my giant ego and the need to prove my worthlessness to myself.

substructure

No more. Please let the pain end.

Lazyrider

This post just proves my point about the Aholes that partake in this sport. Not all roadies, but you are the stereotype of what I speak of.
I can tell you this, if you ever had the balls to call me a Fred on the road, I'd catch up to you at the next light (cuz I'm a lowly Fred and would need the light to do so) and I would punch you in the throat.

the beef

not this shyte again.

pseudobrit

Since I'm just another "Ahole" Road Nazi, you'd get to the light to find I'd run it. Being a Fred, you'd stop, feel superior about following the letter of the law, and take a sip from your Camelbak.

mtnwalker

So thats why the guy with the panniers disappeared when I looked back behind me after blowing the red light. He actually stopped. What a maroon.

Lazyrider

O.K. Fonzie!!!

I forgot what a rebel and how cool you are.

akatsuki

Woah, entering a race instead of just posing with carbon fiber bling bikes at the coffee shop in team spandex? Let's not get crazy here. Next thing, you will actually expect me to risk my carbon fiber cleats clipping in.

mattm

i just built up a wheel around a dynohub, is that fredly enough for ya?

Lithuania

hmm i think i became more of a fred after i started racing

RichinPeoria

Well written !

pseudobrit

Fred is a state of mind, not of gear. Your Dynohub is perfectly acceptable as long as you hate yourself for it.

JeffS

Neither enlightening nor entertaining.

The forum was just crying out for another ego-rant.

Lithuania

after racing for over a year i stopped caring about fashionable gear and instead of wanting $2000 dollars wheels I thought about buying multiple sets of $500 - $700 wheels instead.

I also stopped caring about things like matching wheels, etc

Pinyon

I sense that someone got picked on too much by the bigger jocks and really rough kids in the latter grades of high school...

pseudobrit

I've been ready for you, Fred apologists. Fire away.
You cannot possibly hate me more than I hate myself.