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  1. #1
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    Killing small animals

    A couple of weeks ago a squirrel ran under my front tire (well, both tires actually). I was going straight and not too fast so I was fine but the squirrel was not. Today I was hauling pretty fast and a freaking groundhog (woodchuck?) ran under my back tire. Not full grown but big enough. Neat trick to avoid the front and get crunched by the back. Again, fortunately I was going straight or it could've been ugly (it was ugly enough for the critter anyway). What's up with these suicidal animals? Do I start hanging their tails from my handlebars?

  2. #2
    SuperGimp TrojanHorse's Avatar
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    Definitely make a hat out of the woodchuck and maybe bleach the skull of the squirrel and hang it under your saddle.

    I used to think you could avoid deer (in a car) or squirrels (on a bike) but I've learned that when they want to get under your wheel, there's nothing you can do to stop it.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Jakedatc's Avatar
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    Haven't hit anything myself yet but some close calls. a few weeks ago i missed a chipmunk by a close margin but the guy behind me didn't.. little guy's luck ran out
    2007 CSK
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  4. #4
    Sqrl
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    I know of a track that has a big problem with squirrels, and every time you hit one they put a squirrel head sticker on your TT, like they did with fighter pilots in WWI
    Quote Originally Posted by carleton View Post
    Doing one-legged squats while holding chickens in each hand will make someone strong...that doesn't mean it's the best way to train for track racing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nagrom_ View Post
    That would be spectacular. A trail of blood and sealant.

  5. #5
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    On my first ride with my current bike, my first bike, I dodged a squirrel and broke a lever...the very fist damn ride.

  6. #6
    Free Velo Vol! Velo Vol's Avatar
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    I avoid killing small animals.

  7. #7
    Mostly Harmless rjones28's Avatar
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    Woodchucks are surprisingly quick. I've had a couple run across my path lately.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Velo Vol View Post
    I avoid killing small animals.
    Believe me, I'd like to avoid it also. Hitting a groundhog at about 23mph is not my idea of fun. On the other hand, the zertz inserts on my new specialized did a fine job of smoothing out the bump...

  9. #9
    Tour De French Fries Elduderino2412's Avatar
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    every time i kill a small critter i get another tear drop tattoo on my face

  10. #10
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Are you wearing "Rodent in Heat" aftershave on your rides? If so, stop.
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Jed19's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mworden View Post
    What's up with these suicidal animals?
    Funny you said that. I once almost ran down a suicidal squirrel, but I dropped him a card with a suicide prevention hotline phone number, when I looked back, he was squirreling the card away
    Regards,

    Jed

  12. #12
    Descends like a rock pallen's Avatar
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    I used to cut through a cemetery on my way to work. It was full of oak and pecan trees. Apparently, the squirrels there were obsessed with death. I never killed one, but dodged numerous suicide attempts.

  13. #13
    Senior Member David Bierbaum's Avatar
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    The only small life I've killed is with the push lawnmower. For the life of me, I will NEVER know how:
    A.) A dove can hide in not-that-tall grass, and
    B.) WHY, oh WHYYYYY it wouldn't fly away at the sound of an approaching push lawnmower.

    The sound. The cloud of downy gray feathers belching out from under the mower. The... mess...

  14. #14
    Senior Member Nachoman's Avatar
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    I'm partial to rodents. This is my daughter's guinea pig.
    .
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    Two wheels good. Four wheels bad.

  15. #15
    South Carolina Ed
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    Mothballs will keep them away.

  16. #16
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by David Bierbaum View Post
    The only small life I've killed is with the push lawnmower. For the life of me, I will NEVER know how:
    A.) A dove can hide in not-that-tall grass, and
    B.) WHY, oh WHYYYYY it wouldn't fly away at the sound of an approaching push lawnmower.

    The sound. The cloud of downy gray feathers belching out from under the mower. The... mess...
    Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  17. #17
    Tour De French Fries Elduderino2412's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sced View Post
    Mothballs will keep them away.
    Nothing i enjoy more than smelling like my great grandmothers closet coming down the road.

    BTW how slow would i have to go for mothballs to work?

  18. #18
    You Know!? For Kids! jsharr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elduderino2412 View Post
    Nothing i enjoy more than smelling like my great grandmothers closet coming down the road.

    BTW how slow would i have to go for mothballs to work?
    Could you just carry the whole male moth instead?
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    Quote Originally Posted by colorider View Post
    Phobias are for irrational fears. Fear of junk ripping badgers is perfectly rational. Those things are nasty.

  19. #19
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    (Could you just carry the whole male moth instead?)

    that made me laugh so hard I spit on my computer!!
    Poker and riding two divergent past times that both make my day

  20. #20
    RT
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    The Weird Beard RT's Avatar
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    Frankenstein never scared me. Marsupials, they scare me. They're fast!

  21. #21
    Tour De French Fries Elduderino2412's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    Could you just carry the whole male moth instead?

  22. #22
    Super Moderator BillyD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by David Bierbaum View Post
    For the life of me, I will NEVER know how:

    B.) WHY, oh WHYYYYY it wouldn't fly away at the sound of an approaching push lawnmower.
    He was weak or stupid. You did his species a service - natural selection.
    Where else but the internet can a bunch of cyclists go and be the tough guy? - - jdon
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  23. #23
    Rubber side down Clipped_in's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jsharr View Post
    Could you just carry the whole male moth instead?
    Cleanup on aisle 7
    ...Just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road. ~ Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

  24. #24
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by TrojanHorse View Post
    Definitely make a hat out of the woodchuck and maybe bleach the skull of the squirrel and hang it under your saddle.

    I used to think you could avoid deer (in a car) or squirrels (on a bike) but I've learned that when they want to get under your wheel, there's nothing you can do to stop it.
    Once my friend was driving his VW Passat ~50mph through Grand Teton National Park and a baby deer jumped out of the woods right in front of the car, it's feet never even touched the road.
    It destroyed the radiator and took it's last dump on the windshield before flying off the car so far we couldn't find it.
    Since it was a Friday, we were stranded in Whitefish, Montana for 4 days waiting for a new radiator to show up and get installed.
    I got to enjoy the exciting lifestyle of Whitefish; the highlights were killing time at the Pizza Hut buffet and the bowl-a-rama.

    Some animals just can't handle the stresses of life.

  25. #25
    SuperGimp TrojanHorse's Avatar
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    I hit a deer once on I-80 in western Utah... I crested a hill going somewhere about 80 mph and saw a mamma dear and some deerlings in the right breakdown lane, so I change lanes to the far left and STAND on my brakes.

    She somehow managed to bounce from the breakdown lane to clear in front of my car *WHAM*

    I pulled over to pick deer fur out of my head lights (it was broad daylight at the time) and that damn deer hopped up and ran away. Probably died later. Nothing terribly broken on my car but it did cost a couple grand to repair.

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