How many Zen Buddhists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four: One to screw in the bulb, one to not screw in the bulb, and one to do neither.
Since we've covered Mac users and Windows users....
Q: How many Linux users does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One to recompile the kernel and rpm the bulb, 10,000 to whine about how windows light bulb wizards are ruining computing for everyone, 1,000 to suggest that the new government light bulbs won't run on linux, and 5 MPAA attorneys to sue the guy who figured out how light bulb threads work.
"Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again." .. Robert A. Heinlein
2000 Gunnar Street Dog. Reynolds 853 Steel. Fixed Gear. Fenders, brakes, water bottles.
Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Who cares? How did the flies get in there in the first place?
"I heard the music and I wrote to it. Some people beat drums, some people strum guitars. It's all in the music you hear" ~ Hunter S. Thompson
how many deadheads does it take to change a light bulb?
10,000. 1 to change the lightbulb and 9,999 to follow it around til it burns out.
"more clowns on more bikes, more of the time"
"there's no such thing as strong coffee, only weak people"
this one is an inside joke in my religion. i'm a latter day saint (mormon) and whenever lds folk get together they serve refreshments.
so, here we go:
how many mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
5. one to screw it in and four to serve refreshments.
kaOuse, does that include funeral potatoes and green jello?
How many real men does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Real men can live in the dark.
And of course, concatenating Chuck Norris with Light Bulb jokes...
How does Chuck Norris change a light bulb...
He doesn't, he simply threatens to round house kick the bulb out of existence, and it fixes itself.
How many BikeForums members does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to start a thread about it
1 to take the photos
1 to admonish for not calling a local electrician
1 to submit photos of his last lightbulb change
1 to post multiple links as to where to buy lightbulbs
1 to post photos of rare lightbulbs in his collection that he might be interested in trading for something
1 to argue that you should convert to fluorescent
1 to argue that incandescent is better
1 to submit that he finds great lightbulbs in the local dump
1 to provide opinons of which manufacturers make better lightbulbs
1 to admonish you for not wearing proper protection while changing the lightbulb
1 to suggest you replace it with the exact bulb you burned out to keep it original
1 to suggest that there is nothing wrong with it in the first place
1 to suggest something that makes no sense other than to increase his post count so he can send PM's
1 to offer a home for the bad bulb because he repairs them in his free time
1 to post a link to his dedicated website about a specific brand of lightbulbs
1 to post a link to a previous thread about changing lightbulbs
Last edited by Snydermann; 12-05-11 at 02:54 PM.
1 to post an expired link to a craigslist or ebay deal on lighbulbs
1 to post a photo of his lightbulb changing tool
1 to post how life was better with oil lamps
1 to post how bulbs are old school and you should upgrade to LEDs and a more modern fixture
1 to comment on how your ceiling needs to be painted
1 to tell you your fixture is bent
1 to tell you you didn't photograph it from the correct side and make a snarky comment about your furniture.
1 to tell you to 'flip it'.
How many student radicals does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But you need 5 others to help make the empowering documentary video about it.
How many guitar players does it take?
None, they just steel everyone else's light.
“Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing.”
― Muhammad Ali