Just so you know it doesn't make me fell better to believe anything, like I said before, this is your mess, you got yourself into it, you made bad decisions, and now want/need to ***** and whine about the bad decisions you made! and please don't give me that "there was no other option" bull****! Theres ALWAYS another option. My mother had an accident and became a paraplegic, we rebuilt her home so that it had everthing she needed including lowered everything and extra wide doorway, the whole house was made to fit her chair and put everything within reach, and we had a custom van built for her too, we went on many vacas with her and delt with many of the problems your dealing with, we just went about them the easiest and least expensive ways we could, if it meant moving to keep ourselves sane well then thats what we would have done, not built up debt trying to make people do what we wanted/needed! We could use the money for better things, like keeping her and ourselves comfortable, and if that meant moving so be it, and when she died we switched everything back and sold the house and the custom van we had made for her. Again, theres ALWAYS another option. BTW, you say "judging somebody in my position ... without ever having walked a mile in my shoes ... is rather silly." I say your assuming that no one has ever been in your postion is damned silly! Good luck with your problems dude, I really hope you end up with a longer ladder.