zjrog

Long time, no update. Overall, I'm doing well. I have nerve pain across my right shoulder, use Lyrica to minimize it. Even so, medicated, its like when your foot goes to sleep? And you stomp it to wake it up? That's medicated. I have developed fears. One kept me from picking up both feet on a bike. Until yesterday. I rode a bike around the store at the Salt Lake City performance Bike shop. Its such a little thing, but to me, its huge.

i gave up on building a tandem for a number of reasons. So the bigger of the two Trek 950s will be my recovery bike, until my Fisher doesn't feel so intimidating (taller). My Cannondale I wrecked on still needs a new front wheel, and some new bar tape, but certainly survived the wreck better than I did.

I still have big memory gaps. I have "lost" stuff I know. I was millimeters away from life in a wheelchair and not a day goes by that I don't appreciate that fact. My neck injury could have killed me as well. And the helmet I still say, saved my life. Like my knee recovery, recovering from the whole of my injuries has been really good. Patience learned during my knee recovery paid off in spades. I still have limitations, but mostly what I place on myself due to fears I never had before.

And you know what? I rode a bicycle again yesterday!

XR2

Cool. Baby steps sometimes are the biggest and hardest.

zjrog

I have other fears where I had none before breaking my back and neck. The thought of riding on a hill right now gets my palms sweating. But yes, baby steps.

zjrog

Fear. Is a terrible thing. And it is high time I rip its throat out...

My 1989 Trek 950 MTB sits ready, ready for me to shake off my fear and just go.

Only thing really significant has been dropping the Lyrica. I gained 60 pounds on it. Neurotin/Gabapentin has been working. And I have lost 20 pounds. Its stubborn... And my doc ubderstands my stress levels but my blood pressure is just too high to leave alone. Low dose of Lisinopril has done trick. Proving that if I could lose the weight, or reduce my stressors, I wouldn't need the meds.

What seems a lifetime ago, but just twenty years... I used to build up bikes from trash to give to kids. We were part of a foster parenting program. One of the kids that lived with us, almost adopted, I got him involved in cycling. And then we moved away, without him. Fast forward, a few years ago, he found me on Facebook. And we've been in touch since. He has a family of his own and a career, and remembered all we did to try and help him. He still rides, so do his kids. He recently got a new Surly 29er, and is sending me his not very old Access XCL 29er. Hoping that helps get me rolling again. I'm touched deeply. Kind of returning a favor. Needless to say, this is one emotional old Clyde...

My three year anniversary is just 2 weeks away. I'm scared. But as I said, its time.

Oh yeah. My knee is still doing just fine.