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  1. #1
    i chew straws stinkyonions's Avatar
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    With the success of our last our last STREET NINJA TRIX, I have descended from the shadows to present #2. HOWTO Make Bike Porn.

    1. Clean your bike.
    2. Spray some cologne on it. (Preferably something made by a washed up celebrity. see: J.Low, Britney Spears)
    3. Ride to a city center. Be sure to keep your headgear and katana nearby. This helps other bikers identify you.
    4. Get ready for the photo spread!

    As you can see below, these four steps will help you take on the likes of Mr. Jeremy.


    Nice lighting. Notice the BLING EFFECT from the rims. The "rear mount."


    HARDCORE! This isn't your HBO Red Shoe Diaries crud. Triple header.

  2. #2
    Aluminum. justin79's Avatar
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    Hot!

  3. #3
    polishing my grill hella's Avatar
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    That's some incestuous yellow on yellow action.
    Author of wind and change / phantom of the opera / tenor of the octave range / spews volcanic lava

  4. #4
    F*** Corporate Beer daveIT's Avatar
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    Great, now I need to explain the birds & the bees to my cat who witnessed that vile act. What has the internet come to?!?!?!

    *deletes cookies*
    Last edited by daveIT; 05-09-05 at 01:05 PM. Reason: .
    shutup&ride

  5. #5
    Mo' Senior SSSasky's Avatar
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    I like the hot BSDM outfit on the yellow bike in the second photo ...

    Mmm ... tight rubber ...





    I feel dirty now.

  6. #6
    switching to guns ch0mb0's Avatar
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    can't do none of that without

    Fate is the Hunter
    http://ch0mb0.net/images/Ploesti2.jpg
    http://img187.imageshack.us/img187/8...turesiggp8.jpg
    What are they doing? Why do they come here? Some kind of instinct. Memory, of what they used to do. This was an important place in their lives.
    http://img63.imageshack.us/img63/8074/dodcm.jpg

  7. #7
    Survival of the Fitest TheDL's Avatar
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    Now I'm all hot and bothered *blush*
    ...take your protein pills and put your helmet on...
    2009 Motobecane Fantom Cross Uno, 1983 Univega Nuovo Sport, GT Team LOTTO
    Looking for GT Course ~ 58cm PM Me!

  8. #8
    hang up your boots ostro's Avatar
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    There is another bike in the background sticking its a$$ out at the the group.

  9. #9
    i chew straws stinkyonions's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ch0mb0
    can't do none of that without

    hahahah.....I forgot to take prep shots! You know, the money shots.

  10. #10
    ...leaving skid marks turd's Avatar
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    i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.
    *turd
    can our bikes be friends: fuji track (#3062) & iffy road

  11. #11
    ogre
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    Quote Originally Posted by daveIT
    *deletes cookies*
    man. i was gonna eat those.

  12. #12
    F*** Corporate Beer daveIT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by turd
    i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.
    hmm...don't know...enlighten us
    shutup&ride

  13. #13
    i chew straws stinkyonions's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by turd
    i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.
    You speak like a man of, ahem, experience. My bike fetish is only to fend of ninjas and pirates.

  14. #14
    Banned zelah's Avatar
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    this thread is hot

  15. #15
    more ape than man timmhaan's Avatar
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    you should leave the backpack out of the shot next time. makes it seem like low budget bike porn.

  16. #16
    Sheldon Certified Jaminsky's Avatar
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    No protection...Do I hear the pitter-patter of mini-fixies in the near future? I think so.

  17. #17
    more ape than man timmhaan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by turd
    i'm really glad that the diameter of most bike tubing is smaller than the diameter of.. well.. you know.
    some less fortunate guys do not have the problem of which you speak...

  18. #18
    Senior Member sethw's Avatar
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    WHats up with that bike in the background in that first picture? A little vouyer action going on, too, huh? hehe

  19. #19
    Traffic shark
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    Wierd drop outs on the yellow bike.
    Regards,
    William
    For the SD Crowd

    sdbikecommuter.com

    View from the handle bars:
    sdcyclist.blogspot.com

  20. #20
    Sheldon Certified Jaminsky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by William Karsten
    Wierd drop outs on the yellow bike.
    Nah nah, you're just looking at them the wrong way.

  21. #21
    Traffic shark
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaminsky
    Nah nah, you're just looking at them the wrong way.

    I was. I'm a fool.
    Regards,
    William
    For the SD Crowd

    sdbikecommuter.com

    View from the handle bars:
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  22. #22
    .
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    OK you people.

    When I was a kid, we used to take our bikes and make "the milk machine". Let me see, we used to take one bike, take the chain, and hook it up to another bike, then put the rear wheel of another one next to that rear wheel, and you turn the pedals on one, they all turn. All bikes inverted, standing on their seats/handlebars. I wish I had a picture, that would have been the one justification worth getting my "Checkers and Pogo" camera. We were crazy kids, I never knew we were pervs.

  23. #23
    i chew straws stinkyonions's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by timmhaan
    you should leave the backpack out of the shot next time. makes it seem like low budget bike porn.
    we didn't want to get pegged as posengeur porn makers. you know, a messenger bag adds +10 scene points. an extra 5 if it's custom!

  24. #24
    current member
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    some- variety is good..
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    Quote Originally Posted by stinkyonions
    You speak like a man of, ahem, experience. My bike fetish is only to fend of ninjas and pirates.
    ahem back.. i think turd is female.. but wtf she might have experience.. true?

    and btw do you have to do it in front of my cityhall.. i mean i know peeps that got married in there.

  25. #25
    cxmagazine dot com pitboss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaminsky
    No protection...Do I hear the pitter-patter of mini-fixies in the near future? I think so.
    The Viner has protection...look at the front wheel, in front of the fork. It knows when to stop.

    StinkyO's - who owns the Viner? Nice looking ride.
    Deathlap - cyclocross, training, beer,...escape hatch

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