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Thread: any advice...

  1. #1
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    any advice...

    so in my better paid job, i'm a messenger agony aunt.

    buyt this ones got me stumped... not really, but i wanna plagarise something offa you guys.

    Dear Aunty Nasty
    I have a problem, my EX is a vegan. Every time i tuck into a tasty
    bacon sandwich, or Pigs heart salad, all i can think of is her eyes
    staring at me as if i were satan. what shall i do? am i destined to
    become a vegan too? i dont think i'd have enough energy to ride my
    bike if i was. help me please!

    so i know this guy. he rocks. his ex on the other hand doesnt. now i've got nuthing agianst vegans - my ex fiance was one before she started sleeping around on me, but whatever...

    help my boy out here people!

    y'all get a headsup on www.movingtargetzine.com

    take care, ride safe, etc
    c nasty
    messenger. mcr
    the unofficial district of columbia east coast north american world fixed gear courier competition winner 2004

  2. #2
    roll'em high shants's Avatar
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    the fact that he's still living with his ex (or spending a lot of time around her) is probably the first thing that he needs to remedy.

  3. #3
    I am an incurable. delay's Avatar
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    I don't get it.

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    Iguana Subsystem dolface's Avatar
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    what shants said, and also, as soon as he starts sleeping with someone else he'll get over it.

    in the meantime, start small, sausage or pepperoni on his pizza, some bacon crumbled into the scrambled eggs, just like training for a race.

    (and i'm vegan if it makes aany difference).

  5. #5
    Senior Member eddiebrannan's Avatar
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    who gives a **** what she thinks. ex means ex

    get over it

  6. #6
    !Newbie, !Senior Member SyntaxPC's Avatar
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    It took me so many re-reads to figure out what the **** you are trying to ask that I don't think I have enough energy to ride my bike now.

    If this is really a problem for him, which could be serious, perhaps he should entrust it to a more creditable body than an online fixed gear forum.

  7. #7
    Senior Member eddiebrannan's Avatar
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    and if he's eating pig's heart salads he needs to get over that gross disgusting **** too

  8. #8
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    hey, hearts are good. very strong muscle = good meaty meat.

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    Iguana Subsystem dolface's Avatar
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    eating organs is gross

  10. #10
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    meh, to each his own. my dad raised me with a fairly adventurous palate.

  11. #11
    Iguana Subsystem dolface's Avatar
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    my parents did too, but organs never worked for me.
    my brother on the other hand...

  12. #12
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    heh. this is one thing my dad created (he's always experimenting in the kitchen. it rubbed off on me, totally): red cabbage, red onions, cinnamon, apples, and raisins, all stewed together. most disgusting slop i've ever tasted. now THAT'S nasty.

    to me, organs are just a dead animal i'm eating, the same as a thigh or wing or steak.

    anyway, this dude in the letter should eat what he wants and stop worrying about his ex. obviously he still gives a **** about her for whatever reason, so that needs to be remedied before he can stop worrying. so i second dolface, he should sleep with someone else, or at least start talking to other girls and getting numbers and ****. find a new pretty, fixie riding gal to fall head over heels for, you know?

  13. #13
    roll'em high shants's Avatar
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    slay 'tang.

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    Iguana Subsystem dolface's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SirrusPackage

    your tags are reversed

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    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    ha ha ha....reminds me...i have some breakfast sausage in the fridge. mmmm....

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    Dirty White Boy SirrusPackage's Avatar
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    Dirty White Boy SirrusPackage's Avatar
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    And organ meat is delicious. Chicken liver omelettes are just one prime example.

  18. #18
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    ok people, for those of you that dont get this post... ma boys ex just KEEPS on bugging him... she rung him up mebbe 30 tmes the other day, loads of emails etc... he wants no part of it... he's a dedicated carnivore that had to go to the dark side of veganism whilst he was dating her... he wants some advice as to how to put her off i guess. thanks so much for all your commetns so far, but i need more - ya aunty nasty needs more... and i'm not talking about stapling strips of bacon to ya pumas... (that is a bristish thing - our rashers of bacon look more like the puma thing than your very odd us rashers, HOWEVER uastraqlian bacon sucks. tastes waaay too piggy) if you aint getting it, then check out www.movingtargetzine.com. i do the agony aunt column. it aint rocket science
    c nasty
    messenger. mcr
    the unofficial district of columbia east coast north american world fixed gear courier competition winner 2004

  19. #19
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    i'm partial to hearts. liver's not bad either, and i have some chicken gizzards in the freezer i need to cook up sometime.

    EDIT: i also am looking for haggis in the portland area.

  20. #20
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    hmmm, so he just wants her to shut up and quit bugging him? has he said so yet? to her, i mean.

  21. #21
    Iguana Subsystem dolface's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nasty
    ok people, for those of you that dont get this post... ma boys ex just KEEPS on bugging him... she rung him up mebbe 30 tmes the other day, loads of emails etc... he wants no part of it... he's a dedicated carnivore that had to go to the dark side of veganism whilst he was dating her... he wants some advice as to how to put her off i guess. thanks so much for all your commetns so far, but i need more - ya aunty nasty needs more... and i'm not talking about stapling strips of bacon to ya pumas... (that is a bristish thing - our rashers of bacon look more like the puma thing than your very odd us rashers, HOWEVER uastraqlian bacon sucks. tastes waaay too piggy) if you aint getting it, then check out www.movingtargetzine.com. i do the agony aunt column. it aint rocket science
    don't answer calls from her, create a filter that sends her email to the trash, and tell her he's gonna get a restraining order if she doesn't stop stalking her.

    and then send her a pound of raw bacon in the mail.

  22. #22
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    ok, hows this?

    get an asbo on her

    turn up at her house at 3am next tuesday morning, high on rock, naked and smothered in beef dripping, with back bacon rashers stapled to his feet (pumas) and an aviator helmet made out of steak. and then ask to get reaquainted with her. in the biblical sense.

    tell her that she never really had a trust fund (she gotta pay everything back) and that 8her 0's chromed carlton track bike is really a pista with the decals ripped off...

    you people think that might just put her off?
    c nasty
    messenger. mcr
    the unofficial district of columbia east coast north american world fixed gear courier competition winner 2004

  23. #23
    Senior Member eddiebrannan's Avatar
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    he needs to be eating some fresh organs, namean?

  24. #24
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    sorry, for you north americans...

    asbo - anti social behaviour order

    i have two at the moment. i cant go within 1/2 mile of my next door neighbour because he threatened my housemate, the other i cant divulge on this forum
    c nasty
    messenger. mcr
    the unofficial district of columbia east coast north american world fixed gear courier competition winner 2004

  25. #25
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    well, that's the idea, isn't it?

    edit: in regard to putting her off.

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