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  1. #1
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    messenger related rant

    tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Rancid's Avatar
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    You should have.....
    a. challenged him to a ride off (like in quicksilver with that little montage of all the guys busting tricks
    b. given him the official messenger handshake
    c. ask to see his messenger decoder ring



    actually option C would be the jam. I want one, I'll make one for you out of foil too if you want
    I've been here since 2004? I've never felt this old before.

  3. #3
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    dang, my first instinct was to challenge him to a ride off, but there were no other bikes locked up outside before i got there, and his pants were not rolled up. aka he probably didnt ride there

  4. #4
    live free or die trying humancongereel's Avatar
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    ha ha ha...the ring thing is great.

    seriously, though...if people like that don't follow me around being jerks, i find i have a much more pleasant evening if i just pretend i told them to bugger off and then stay away from the rest of the night. keep away from the negative vibes or aura or...hell, you know what i mean. stay away from people that'll piss me off and ruin the night.
    have:ea50 flats, black, light, stiff.
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    144 bcd 46t or 47t chainring any kind or width

  5. #5
    not the jam
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    Quote Originally Posted by melikebike
    tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.
    Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.

  6. #6
    Barbieri Telefonico huhenio's Avatar
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    /\/\/\/\

    you made my morning
    Giving Haircuts Over The Phone

  7. #7
    redonkulous Rikardi151's Avatar
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    chortle

  8. #8
    Senior Member mattface's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shankton
    Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.
    You plumbers think you are SOOOOOO cool... flashing your crack to the world.

  9. #9
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    I made the mistake one night of bragging to a girl about how nice my ass is. She then decided she wanted a nice look n' grab. I was embarassed because I realized my pants and underwear were already hanging halfway off. The good news: She concurred, I have a nice ass. The bad news: I still went home alone.
    I'm not even a plumber! I just make bad decisions when I drink.

  10. #10
    loves living in the city. Ira in Chi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shankton
    Damn, the same thing happens to me when I stroll into a party with my plumber's tool bag in tow and what not, because the plumber image is mega-cool. When some AH talks sh*t to me, I just cave his skull in with a 24 inch pipe wrench.
    This is why I don't invite plumbers to my parties. They show up with thier macho plumber bs, drink all of my beer, agressively hit on any female guests, leave their tools laying all over the dancefloor, and by the end of the night one of 'em will be wasted and trying to dissasemble the trap on my bathroom sink. Plumbers may come off as cool, but they are really a bunch of lowlife scum!

  11. #11
    loves living in the city. Ira in Chi's Avatar
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    The glamorization of plumbers is PLAYED OUT!


  12. #12
    not the jam
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ira in Chi
    This is why I don't invite plumbers to my parties. They show up with thier macho plumber bs, drink all of my beer, agressively hit on any female guests, leave their tools laying all over the dancefloor, and by the end of the night one of 'em will be wasted and trying to dissasemble the trap on my bathroom sink. Plumbers may come off as cool, but they are really a bunch of lowlife scum!
    Next time your toilet is clogged up, good luck getting one of us to help. Call a bike messenger.

  13. #13
    Good Afternoon! SamHouston's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MKRG
    I made the mistake one night of bragging to a girl about how nice my ass is. She then decided she wanted a nice look n' grab. I was embarassed because I realized my pants and underwear were already hanging halfway off. The good news: She concurred, I have a nice ass. The bad news: I still went home alone.
    I'm not even a plumber! I just make bad decisions when I drink.
    Can't be giving it away like that, once she knows then the mystery is gone, gotta keep her guessing til she REALLY wants to know. Doesn't hurt to keep a plug wrench or a tube bender just visible in your messenger bag, you don't say you're a plumber, but with tools and crack showing...maybe she's getting lucky

  14. #14
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    Prime example of the good natured, stupid humor that this forum needs to get back to. No need to be knocking people to have a good time! Unless you're a plumber.
    Thanks Sam, that's good advice. I'll try to keep it in mind next time I'm in that situation. A crack without any mystery, is just a crack. Need to maintain that air of mystery, it's what it's all about.

  15. #15
    loves living in the city. Ira in Chi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shankton
    Next time your toilet is clogged up, good luck getting one of us to help. Call a bike messenger.
    You sound like a pose-lumber to me!

  16. #16
    not the jam
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    There have been a number of unkind references to plumbers crack in this thread. It is discouraging that a$$crack is what plumbers are primarily known for.
    Remember that plumbers have an emormous responsibility to face every day. Not only do we safeguard the health of the nation by ensuring that clean water comes up and dirty water goes down, we also have to share the burden of ultracool hipness with bike messengers.

  17. #17
    Senior Member the pope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ira in Chi
    You sound like a pose-lumber to me!
    bwaaaaaaaaa! good zinger.

  18. #18
    not the jam
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    I am as DONE as Don Walker.
    You should all go and clean the hair out of your p-traps.

  19. #19
    Senior Member mattface's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shankton
    There have been a number of unkind references to plumbers crack in this thread. It is discouraging that a$$crack is what plumbers are primarily known for.
    Plumbers are known for ass cracks like messengers are known for messenger bags. It's a sort of a trademark of the profession, but ANYONE can sport one.

  20. #20
    garbage picker the homealien's Avatar
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    The last time I went to a plumber party I got some 'tude cause I ran a front and back belt on my multi-pocket pants.

  21. #21
    loves living in the city. Ira in Chi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shankton
    Remember that plumbers have an emormous responsibility to face every day. Not only do we safeguard the health of the nation by ensuring that clean water comes up and dirty water goes down, we also have to share the burden of ultracool hipness with bike messengers.
    Sure, that's why you became a plumber- it didn't have anything to do with the recent popularity of plumbers in urban youth culture? I remember a time when you didn't see teenagers walking around Wicker Park with a Roto-rooter over their shoulder!

  22. #22
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    man a plumb-off, er a race-off would have shown him.

  23. #23
    GG + Wendy O. 4EVA raygunner's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by melikebike
    tonight, me and two of my other mess. friends strolled into a party, mess. bags in tow and what not. well apparently a former messenger there(2yrsvelocity) thought that we walked in the place like we owned it and procedeed to talking sh#t for the rest of the night. after a "man to man" talk with him, he only continued to believe that we were trying to be cool cuz the messenger image is cool, and was a total buzz kill. man i didnt think that these kind of people actually existed, but they do.
    What kinda of bike did he ride?

    Did you have a better bike than him? That's the only issue here!

  24. #24
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    good question, i think the mere presence of my bike totally crushed his non existent(or not present) bike, btw i was riding my surly pacer(backup rain bike) cuz my sweet schwinn conversion was put out of commision earlier that night at critical mass

  25. #25
    GG + Wendy O. 4EVA raygunner's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by melikebike
    good question, i think the mere presence of my bike totally crushed his non existent(or not present) bike, btw i was riding my surly pacer(backup rain bike) cuz my sweet schwinn conversion was put out of commision earlier that night at critical mass
    Surly es muy bueno!

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