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  1. #1
    the greatest swindle srsly's Avatar
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    i honked at a car today

    on my way home from work today some jerk honked at me for no apparent reason. i was to the far right of the right lane, but far enough to be outside of door prize range and the bastard honked at me as he went by. there's no bike lane on this road for a little ways but it's a known cycling commuter road, so people aren't shocked to see me here; there also wasn't enough traffic to occupy both lanes either. so i flipped him off (probably not the best thing to have done) and went on my merry way not really thinking any more about it. about a half mile or so down the road i come up on a line of cars at a red and i happen to see the guy. he had his passenger window open so i leaned over as i passed and went "HONK!" was this the proper thing to have done? probably not. was it extremely childish? yep. did it feel good? you betcha.
    when it burns you know it's working
    srsly

  2. #2
    如果你能讀了這個你講中文 genericbikedude's Avatar
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  3. #3
    Senior Member srcurran's Avatar
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    other fun noises to make on a bike:
    vroom
    ring ring
    beep beep
    weeee
    flickr I hardly know'r

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    i've done the same thing, only i was riding on a fairly empty and wide road one night, a car drove past, and the passenger leaned out and yelled at me.
    i wasn't planning on catching them or anything, but saw that they were stopped at a red, passed them on the right, and yelled back at the passenger as i passed.
    when i was riding away i heard, "you better ride as fast as you can, i'm going to get you, blah blah blah," so i made a quick right on red, and hauled ass out of there.
    might not have been the smartest thing to do, especially being alone at night, but it was pretty satisfying at the time.

  5. #5
    Biggity-bam
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    It's so wrong, but I really want to carry around one of those boating air horns when I ride.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
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    My favorite story is still the one where the biker kicked off the guy side mirror while riding by.

  7. #7
    Good for Business koyman's Avatar
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    I think this thread was aiming towards the more clever, less violent reactions towards motorists' bull****.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
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    My old roommate used to take off so many sideview
    mirrors with his mini u-lock, in fact he still does. It's
    funny that cars don't think that you can catch up to
    them when they drive by you and yell something.
    Those mirrors do come off quite easily though. This
    is by no means encouraging people to do so, but just
    saying.

  9. #9
    anarchy burger skelly's Avatar
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    as for non-destructive things to do to *******s (drivers or anyone), i still really like that "You are a ******." card.

  10. #10
    Good for Business koyman's Avatar
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    thumbs up and/or "do you feel better now?"

  11. #11
    J E R S E Y S B E S T Jerseysbest's Avatar
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    I usually just smash the guy's rear window, but thats just me
    Quote Originally Posted by SingingSabre View Post
    Cheating: a symptom of the problem.

  12. #12
    Senior Member morbot's Avatar
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    teh greatest is to carry a fake grenade and ride up and pull the pin and throw it in their window

  13. #13
    Senior Member
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    I rode up next to a VW the other day that said a bunch of stuff about biodiesel on the back. The window was rolled down, so I asked the driver where he fueled the thing. Hew said he was from out of town and didn't know where to get gas for it locally. He was friendly. We chatted for a minute until the light turned green.

    That was my last significant interaction with a driver while riding. I haven't been honked at recently.

  14. #14
    the greatest swindle srsly's Avatar
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    i'm not really into property damage but whatever floats your boat. this kinda crap doesn't happen often in seattle, but today i wasn't ready to take any crap from some ******bag in a Kia, the Playskool of the automotive world.
    when it burns you know it's working
    srsly

  15. #15
    Dismount Run Remount etc. 12XU's Avatar
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    Smashing a dude's mirror off with a U-lock is just going to push him/her to be aggressive to all of the cyclists s/he passes in the future...

  16. #16
    Senior Member Nachoman's Avatar
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    Just pull up to the vehicle, tell him that you didn't appreciate the honk, give him a big hug and sing Kumbaya.
    .
    .

    Two wheels good. Four wheels bad.

  17. #17
    Vanned. worker4youth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by morbot
    teh greatest is to carry a fake grenade and ride up and pull the pin and throw it in their window
    Where do you get these fake grenades?

  18. #18
    anarchy burger skelly's Avatar
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    you can get training grenades at army surplus stores.

  19. #19
    Senior Member mrkott3r's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skelly
    you can get training grenades at army surplus stores.
    you wanna be careful with these. In Australian law if you use one like its the real thing and bystanders cant tell if its fake, you can get done as if the grenade was real.

    this was important for a few cases where some people held up some stores with a fake ******. They tried to use the defence that it was fake but it was ruled that if it looks like the real thing and you are acting like it is the real thing, basically it is the real thing.

    I would check your state legal code or crimes act before doing this

  20. #20
    anarchy burger skelly's Avatar
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    yeah, i'm definitely not endorsing the idea...

  21. #21
    Wake Up America! helvetica's Avatar
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    I just throw naked pictures of whoopie goldberg in their car.
    ibsomeonesayssomethingabootbillhicks

  22. #22
    Senior Member mattface's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by helvetica
    I just throw naked pictures of whoopie goldberg in their car.
    where did you get naked pictures of whoopie?

  23. #23
    jack of one or two trades Aeroplane's Avatar
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    Yesterday, a car that was rolling through a stop sign on a right turn almost hit me. I glared back at them with hatred as I passed by. As he came from behind, he gave me a little honk, and waved apologetically. I waved back, accepting his apology.

    Not all honks are bad.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dr Irwin Goldstein
    Men should never ride bicycles. Riding should be banned and outlawed. It is
    the most irrational form of exercise I could ever bring to discussion.

  24. #24
    the greatest swindle srsly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aeroplane
    Yesterday, a car that was rolling through a stop sign on a right turn almost hit me. I glared back at them with hatred as I passed by. As he came from behind, he gave me a little honk, and waved apologetically. I waved back, accepting his apology.

    Not all honks are bad.
    this is very true, not all people are jerks. i just assumed that my guy was being a jerk since his honk was more than an attention getting little beep as he zoomed around me :shrug:
    when it burns you know it's working
    srsly

  25. #25
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrkott3r
    you wanna be careful with these. In Australian law if you use one like its the real thing and bystanders cant tell if its fake, you can get done as if the grenade was real.

    this was important for a few cases where some people held up some stores with a fake ******. They tried to use the defence that it was fake but it was ruled that if it looks like the real thing and you are acting like it is the real thing, basically it is the real thing.

    I would check your state legal code or crimes act before doing this
    Yeah I know someone who went to jail for holding up a gas station with a water ******.
    Also, a couple years ago a man, in NYC, was shot nine times (before hitting the ground) because cops thought he had a grenade. turns out he was eating an apple. Moral of the story: Fake grenades is NOT a good idea.

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