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  1. #1
    www.messnyc.net bldzr's Avatar
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    Portland: Brakeless victory/ Fakenger ****** ruins it for everyone

    as presented by BikePortland:

    40 year track bike rider John Boyd won his case defending his right to ride a "brakeless" bike, by repeating over and over the definition of "brake" as appears in Merriam Webster, and pointing out to the judge that there was no statutory definition. Therefore, the Webster's definition must be considered. The police officer was Barnum, the same dipsh*t from the Ayla Holland case, but the Judge was different. The judge announced that this was not a precendent, and the future cases would be decided on a case-by-case basis. Now was that so ******** hard?

    However, so that there wouldn't be too much positive excitement in the rose city, some suburban fakenger ****** took the opportunity to ram himself into a old lady's car in front of a "share the road" demonstration, and then blamed it on her. He got arrested for "disorderly conduct" and flagged as "the guy that ruins it for everybody."

    F'in new jacks. More enthusiasm than brain cells.

  2. #2
    ambassador of good will *new*guy's Avatar
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    the bastard love child of shawn white and carrot top

  3. #3
    in grind we crust
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    i love the police officer on the right in that first photo.

    c'mon guys, give the kid a brake..

    yuk yuk.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by *new*guy
    the bastard love child of shawn white and carrot top
    Hey dont even compare this guy to Shaun White. He is God, its that simple.

  5. #5
    YOU ARE NOW TUNED IN No_Minkah's Avatar
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    Look at this ****ing ******


  6. #6
    YOU ARE NOW TUNED IN No_Minkah's Avatar
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    I love these pictures


  7. #7
    YOU ARE NOW TUNED IN No_Minkah's Avatar
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  8. #8
    Good Afternoon! SamHouston's Avatar
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    That's the funniest blog story I've read in a while gawdamighty, I hope he does keep it updated with info about flopsy-mopsy there. I totally belive the old lady/cops side of it, plus the dude didn't seem to be hurt at all, nor his ride neither though you can't see much. Maybe he was going to do the popular "soft-tissue damage" thing, "oh oh I'm hurt but you'll just have to trust me, I'm really hurt! honest! ow!"

    That cop does look keen on being in the picture! That's okay, at least he didn't take the camera and step on it! Portland cops ain't so bad!

    Why is the wack-job looking at the camera while cuffed, and posing for it b4 the cops arrived? Maybe it's just cause I'm ugly but a strangers camera is something I have no interest in being in front of, if I were both ugly AND being arrested for ignorance I know I'd at least hide my face!

  9. #9
    Good Afternoon! SamHouston's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by No_Minkah
    OMG that's ****ing hilarious

  10. #10
    Throbbing Member
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    Wait a minute, where's Humancongoreel...?
    I didn't come here, and I ain't leaving.

  11. #11
    Senior Member shishi's Avatar
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    I run into cars all the time, it is the newest trick

  12. #12
    Senior Member juvi-kyle's Avatar
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    hey...thats me!
    Quote Originally Posted by dutret
    trackosaurusrex.com is just about the best thing ever!

  13. #13
    Senior Member kathrot's Avatar
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    the sharpie knuckle tattoos are killing me!!!

  14. #14
    Senior Member the pope's Avatar
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    Is the biker's middle name ... ... ... DANGER?

    Dump Dump Daaaahhhhh!

  15. #15
    cxmagazine dot com pitboss's Avatar
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    deserving of a little police brutality?
    Deathlap - cyclocross, training, beer,...escape hatch

  16. #16
    Senior Member the pope's Avatar
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    aw, he doesn't look too roughed up

  17. #17
    shoot up or shut up. isotopesope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by [165]
    deserving of a little police brutality?
    he at least deserves some old lady's purse brutality. that's probably about all it would take to subdue that toilet.

  18. #18
    cxmagazine dot com pitboss's Avatar
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    like I said...deserving.

    to be honest, people like this "rider" truly irritate and sicken me. i feel no shame in saying I hope he is fully prosecuted and the cycling community shows up to applaud his sentencing. there is a distance that needs to exist.
    Deathlap - cyclocross, training, beer,...escape hatch

  19. #19
    cxmagazine dot com pitboss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by isotopesope
    he at least deserves some old lady's purse brutality. that's probably about all it would take to subdue that toilet.
    HAHA!
    we miss you, man.
    Deathlap - cyclocross, training, beer,...escape hatch

  20. #20
    Senior Member
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    Does anyone actually think that beer headbages are cool?

  21. #21
    succumbs to errata jaypee's Avatar
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    Wait wait wait, people like that actually exist? Anyway, yes, throw the book at him and disavow his arse. Like in Mission Impossible, but without computers and helicopters and guns and spies and stuff.

  22. #22
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    "His legs, his scrawny scrawny legs with 0 definition, (you can be scrawny, but no tone??) and pasty pasty whiteness at THE END of summer?"

    That comment from the blog made me laugh. It is true that you can usually tell whether someone is a cyclist or not from their legs. It still makes you wonder why someone would try so hard to pose as a messenger when they aren't. Especially in a smaller city like Portland where it most likely could be easily verified. I think we need to start revoking bike privileges for some people.

  23. #23
    Banned zelah's Avatar
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    lol this dude's belt

  24. #24
    Senior Member
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    he may look funny, but ramming cars is pretty sweet and in my opinion perfectly reasonable. as long as you don't ram them head on.

  25. #25
    like, really sloppy sloppy robot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by freebird
    Wait a minute, where's Humancongoreel...?
    seriously... upside down risers? just got a job as a messenger?

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