Bikes: Cannondale T1000, Inbred SS 29er, Supercaliber 29er, Crescent Mark XX, Burley Rumba Tandem
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Update: He saw a kid cruising the neighborhood on it and called 5-0. The cops came and hauled the kid out of his high school weight room in front of his coaches and the whole football team. The bike has been returned to the rightful owner.