I have had diff experiences as well, have asked people if they minded if I camped on their property with no problems (a Basque farmer in Spain, using my not so great Spanish), have had people invite me to sleep in their camptrailer instead of putting up my tent (Bretagne, France) and a few times just set up tent where I had to (but once didnt like it, as cars came by in the night, and you worry about drunk young guys being jerks...not the case, but didnt sleep well nonetheless)
best one, was in the Pyrenees, on a hillside by an old abandoned church, edge of a small very quiet village/ski resort, in the morning got woken up by the tent moving, stuck my head out to see some grazing cows and some horses had just wandered down from up on the mountainside and were nibbling our tents. Was rather funny, and they hung around the whole time we were packing up, trying to taste the saddle bags etc. I really loved biking the Pyrenees, very pretty landscapes, very cool passes and views, and the horses/cows memory is one that sticks out.
in the end, I always preferred a campground, for the shower the most, even if pretty basic, but once in a while your planned day goes differently, or a given campground is no longer there or whatever so you improvise. Being a guy definately is less of a worry for this sort of thing I realize.