OP - take everything here with a grain of salt....
Let me share my take - a bit of background first: I am a professional career cat 4 Racer. I frequently go off the back of most heavy crits just so I can indulge in my favorite pastime - yelling at other slow guys.
In reality - I have spent my fair share of time in the pack lapping riders as well as being lapped. If you were riding with me I would have yelled at you that we were getting lapped as well - this is why:
1. When off the back - be AWARE of where the field is. This isn't a tiathlon and you're not going to set a "
PR" or fight so that you are 51st instead of 52nd in the results. You are off the back. Your race is over. Race heads up and you might be allowed to actually ride on the course for the rest of the race and not cause any problems.
2. When you come off the back the amount of time it takes the field to come up on you decreases as the race continues. You tire even more and their speed increases. So while it may have taken them 10 laps to lap you the first time they might be back around in 5 this next time.
3. When it's been a while start taking a quick look over your shoulder at the end of a long straight before you corner. If you don't see the leaders or a pace car then race the next section like you normally would. If you see the leaders or the pace car then start thinking right then where you need to make sure you are when they pass. The idea is to GTFO of the way. You have no business being anywhere near where the race is occurring at this point. This can even mean you STOP in a spot that is completely out of the way if you realize that failing to do so will result in you being passed in a tight section.
4. Understand that even if you're out of the way many riders still int he pack WILL yell at you. Why? because they feel that they need to, because they think they are showing the rest of the pack that they know what they are doing by yelling at that lapped guy, and because there have been a butt-ton of wrecks cased by riders doing what you described in the OP. You may know exactly what you're doing and may think that everything is fine, but all it takes is one dumbass to think you're doing something else to cause a wreck.
5. When I am in a race with a pace car they will usually honk. I usually acknowledge the honk and I have even gone so far as to give the car a "hold the f back" hand signal if I know I can make it through a tight section before it becomes an issue, etc. I usually give the car a thumbs up or a finger pointed to what side i am "clearing" for the field. Works well and I have been thanked by many.
6. If it's coming down to the last few laps - err on the side of caution. GTFO of the way. I try to make sure the pack laps me BEFORE they get 2 to go. That way I am right off the back of them with 2 to go. This pretty much assures that you won't be in the mix when all hell breaks loose. If you don't do this - at least around here - you're getting pulled. Not the end of the world, but there ARE ways to stay out there and stay safe but it requires that you think!
Again...when in doubt - just GTFO of the way. If you are on a long wide straight then just hold up and let them by. Point to the direction and they will usually know you know that they are coming. I have seen other riders riding with a hand up as though they are going back through the pack because of a mechanical. Just make sure you aren't on the racing line.
I write all of this because I sat out there and raced for 45 minute at one of the best crit courses in the country yesterday (it was an NRC race this year until Superweek claimed it back) and I got lapped....something like 5 times. The last 2 I made happen in the last couple of laps just for safety. It's a well known dangerous course in hte last few laps and I made sure I was out of the fray.
aham23 was near the front and was taken out with 2 to go