Personally I like a women's bike so I don't always have to kick my leg over the back. I'm shorter in the torso and so reaching to the bars meant getting an even shorter stem on an women's bike. (My stem is a 40mm and my bars are Ritchy shorter reach drops. the stem is canted upwards as well). Proper fit is the most important issue, then weight. Getting a bike that can handle your weight is great, but if its uncomfortable to ride you won't use it.
I'm 220 lbs and carry 40 lbs of groceries/camping gear etc on my bikes often..
I find the frames are fine.. it's rims and tires that are more important than frames.