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Old 04-15-19, 06:35 AM
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Originally Posted by burnthesheep View Post
I’d rather lose badly trying than not trying? I’m hard on myself?

I dunno. I think the real answer is that maybe I’m not having fun and the rest is just stuff I overthink to rationalize trying again.

Given the time input I have for this, I do more than fine. Realistically. It just doesn’t feel that way.

I also don’t have a great chance to contribute towards a sense of “belonging” to racing. My fault only.

Although, everyone today was super nice. Nicer than a lot of hammer rides I do even. Made me wonder about what I’m missing.

Maybe until I have more time someday to contribute to it, I need to be content. And maybe focus on a few more reasonable goals, like maybe TT PR’s.

Again, all on me. The thinking is about analyzing if the time I have for this is worth what I get out of it.

To me, it sounds like you need to join a good club -- one that has many active racers -- as you seem to be looking for camaraderie and a social outlet in addition to athletic performance. Being able to talk and interact with experienced racers will also help you grow as a rider.

In racing, it helps to have a strong team -- I could always count on my team mate to nail back a break or increase pace and get me clear of the scrum for the finish, and I could also be content knowing that his chances in a break were really good. However, because we were a dominant "team" of 2, we were always heavily marked and expected to make the race. So being an anonymous individual rider can also be a good thing -- you just have to learn to read the course, the race patterns, and the players. Then your efforts won't be wasted. Remember, in racing there's just one winner and the rest have to be satisfied with getting something -- whether it's just riding hard or a minor result -- so it's good to think about what you're getting out of this sport if you want to last long in this game.
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