it definitely helps to develop the power to stay on with the group. i remember my first club ride back in the day when i found out just how fast a race pace was. even though i had worked really hard to get into the shape i was in at the time, i just wasn't as fast as i thought.
it was a great wake-up all for sure, and because of that i wasn't caught by surprise in my first race.
it even happened this year when i decided to take racing more seriously. i figured i'd go on that same group ride just to see what it was like again, and of course i got dropped. but it was a reminder of how much hard work you have to put in just to get up to speed. and then, once you're able to roll with the pack, it's even more hard work to get to the point where you can run up front.
just keep working at it. if you think you're working hard now and you aren't able to hang with those guys, then you're either doing something wrong training-wise or you aren't working hard enough when you do train.
this is just one of those processes you go through that makes you realize you can push yourself alot harder and farther than you thought. once you figure it out, you'll do nothing but improve.
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"When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return." - Leonardo daVinci