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Patentcad's 10 Rules of Road Bike Riding/Racing

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Patentcad's 10 Rules of Road Bike Riding/Racing

Old 09-02-06, 09:48 AM
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Patentcad's 10 Rules of Road Bike Riding/Racing

#1- It is more important to look like a pro than to ride like a pro.

#2 - It is never too late to get dropped on a fast ride or race.

#3 - There is always somebody faster than you.

#4 - We're all peloton dogs - and every dog has his day - just keep showing up.

#5 - You will crash sooner or later, but it happens so fast you won't get scared.

#6 - Better to hit a pothole on the right side of the white line than get clipped by a pickup truck on the left side of it.

#7 - The fastest way to get dropped is to be on the wrong wheel.

#8 - Lance is right - it's NOT about the bike - but some haven't ridden enough miles to realize that yet.

#9 - Bicycling magazine is right - the Soul of Cycling is not in the pro peloton - it's in the 8 million riders who ride at least twice a week in the US (and their counterparts worldwide).

#10 - Any ride you can walk away from is a good one.

Last edited by patentcad; 09-02-06 at 08:27 PM.
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Old 09-02-06, 10:36 AM
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#1 WRONG WRONG WRONG you freakin amateur wannabe pro weenie POS
#5 Yup, sometimes you dont even get a chance to get an expletive out, its the slow motion you see coming and know will hurt bad crashes that really suck
#10 Its inherently better to ride for a living
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Old 09-02-06, 01:13 PM
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Originally Posted by pedex
#1 WRONG WRONG WRONG you freakin amateur wannabe pro weenie POS
#5 Yup, sometimes you dont even get a chance to get an expletive out, its the slow motion you see coming and know will hurt bad crashes that really suck
#10 Its inherently better to ride for a living
But we're ALL friggin (that is the correct spelling by the way) amateurs. 'Wannabe pros?' I don't want to be a pro. I personally know ONE domestic pro. And he lives with his PARENTS. Which beats living in your car. Such is the life of many domestic pros. So I'd agree it might be good to ride for a living. IF you can afford do it. Unfortunately being a 'professional' cyclist in US often means accepting renumeration that most of us would never work for. They do it because they love to ride. And why not? We all ride for nothing and buy all our gear. The one guy I know is thrilled to be riding pro. But he does seem to understand it's not going to be his road to professional success in life. Good thinking. I told him not to worry: he's 25, and he'll have the rest of his life to be cooped up in some office or in front of a computer. He agreed.

I GREATLY prefer it this way. I make more money than 90% of pro cyclists (and this would include the UCI dudes) and I also get to ride my bike all the time. And see my family every day. And sleep in my own bed at night. And walk my dog Sam. And rarely deal with travel/airports.
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Old 09-02-06, 01:21 PM
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man you really love to see yourself post dontcha?
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Old 09-02-06, 01:25 PM
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Originally Posted by riskus
man you really love to see yourself post dontcha?
I actually do it for the intellectual interludes that seem to inevitably follow from other members.
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Old 09-02-06, 01:57 PM
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Originally Posted by riskus
man you really love to see yourself post dontcha?
Haaaaaa Haaaaaaaa!!!
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Old 09-02-06, 03:12 PM
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Originally Posted by patentcad
But we're ALL friggin (that is the correct spelling by the way) amateurs. 'Wannabe pros?' I don't want to be a pro. I personally know ONE domestic pro. And he lives with his PARENTS. Which beats living in your car. Such is the life of many domestic pros. So I'd agree it might be good to ride for a living. IF you can afford do it. Unfortunately being a 'professional' cyclist in US often means accepting renumeration that most of us would never work for. They do it because they love to ride. And why not? We all ride for nothing and buy all our gear. The one guy I know is thrilled to be riding pro. But he does seem to understand it's not going to be his road to professional success in life. Good thinking. I told him not to worry: he's 25, and he'll have the rest of his life to be cooped up in some office or in front of a computer. He agreed.

I GREATLY prefer it this way. I make more money than 90% of pro cyclists (and this would include the UCI dudes) and I also get to ride my bike all the time. And see my family every day. And sleep in my own bed at night. And walk my dog Sam. And rarely deal with travel/airports.
No, YOUR an amateur, im a pro, I ride for a living, and I too make more than most pro racers, big friggin deal. But please, dont dress like a posenger. You aint pro, dont even try to dress like one.
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Old 09-02-06, 03:26 PM
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Originally Posted by pedex
No, YOUR an amateur, im a pro, I ride for a living, and I too make more than most pro racers, big friggin deal. But please, dont dress like a posenger. You aint pro, dont even try to dress like one.
You're (the correct spelling in this context by the way) a bike messenger. Please don't confuse this with 'pro'. Because 99.99% of anyone reading that claim will think you're a pro RACER. And again, it's far more crucial to LOOK like a pro than to ride like a pro. A pro racer, not a pro bike messenger. Anyone here trying to emulate bike messengers? In the NY City food chain they're one notch below road kill, with a similar survival rate.

What could possibly be more incessantly poseur than somebody who keeps posting here that he's a 'pro cyclist' - and he's a BIKE MESSENGER. That's like Bin Laden claiming he's a 'freedom fighter'. Besides, what gives you the notion that emulating pros makes anyone a pro wannabe? That's your idea. By that standard any amateur who takes his sport seriously enough to do it right (cyclists,golfers, runners, bowlers, softball players, etc.) is a 'wannabe'. I know plenty of amateur cyclists (and some VERY good ones) who take their riding cues from the pros. Whatever.

Last edited by patentcad; 09-02-06 at 03:35 PM.
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Old 09-02-06, 03:47 PM
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So every Oriental that drives those tri wheeled "rickshaws" in Asian cities is a pro pedaling cyclist?? lol
As Ron White would say "I don't think so SCOOTER"
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Old 09-02-06, 04:20 PM
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Also, Dude, Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature
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Old 09-02-06, 05:11 PM
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Originally Posted by patentcad
You're (the correct spelling in this context by the way) a bike messenger. Please don't confuse this with 'pro'. Because 99.99% of anyone reading that claim will think you're a pro RACER. And again, it's far more crucial to LOOK like a pro than to ride like a pro. A pro racer, not a pro bike messenger. Anyone here trying to emulate bike messengers? In the NY City food chain they're one notch below road kill, with a similar survival rate.

What could possibly be more incessantly poseur than somebody who keeps posting here that he's a 'pro cyclist' - and he's a BIKE MESSENGER. That's like Bin Laden claiming he's a 'freedom fighter'. Besides, what gives you the notion that emulating pros makes anyone a pro wannabe? That's your idea. By that standard any amateur who takes his sport seriously enough to do it right (cyclists,golfers, runners, bowlers, softball players, etc.) is a 'wannabe'. I know plenty of amateur cyclists (and some VERY good ones) who take their riding cues from the pros. Whatever.
riding for money is riding for money, defintion of pro, and you'd be suprised how many posengers and messenger groupies there are out there---it still shocks me sometimes
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Old 09-02-06, 05:19 PM
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I thought it was a toung and cheek thread. Some people are waay too serious.
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Old 09-02-06, 05:34 PM
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No, the definition of a Pro is someone who holds a USCF or UCI professional license.

I got paid a couple of times in high school after placing well up in some local 5k races. Does that make me a pro? Hell no.
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Old 09-02-06, 06:14 PM
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Originally Posted by pedex
riding for money is riding for money, defintion of pro, and you'd be suprised how many posengers and messenger groupies there are out there---it still shocks me sometimes
Pedex, if you're happy, I'm happy. Wait, I'm happy even if you're not happy. But you sound pretty happy.

Which is all that counts.

Besides, Patentcad's 10 Rules of Cycling are by definition oriented towards amateur riders/racers. Which naturallly includes all manner of posers, OCP's, weenies, etc, yours truly included.

Bike messengers have GROUPIES?? Does anyone else find that....disturbing? Gay or straight ones? Hey, a groupie is a groupie.
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Old 09-02-06, 07:34 PM
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9 out of 10 ain't bad ( to paraphrase meatloaf). drop the 1st one and I think I pretty much agree.
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Old 09-02-06, 08:26 PM
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Oh well. Cycling fashion is in the eyes of the beholder anyway. And everybody has their own ideas about stuff like this.
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Old 09-02-06, 11:53 PM
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I think it's 'better' to ride like a pro than to live like a pro.
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Old 09-03-06, 04:57 AM
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Originally Posted by riskus
man you really love to see yourself post dontcha?
talks about himself in the third person...

"Patentcad's going for a ride..."

"Patentcad really likes his Six/13..."

"Patentcad needs to post on Bikeforums today..."

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Old 09-03-06, 07:10 AM
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Originally Posted by pedex
riding for money is riding for money, defintion of pro.
i never realized that there SO MANY "pros" out there






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Old 09-03-06, 07:36 AM
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+37. Riding a bicycle in the course of doing one's job does not make one a "professional cyclist."
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Old 09-03-06, 08:08 AM
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Iím a former pro cyclist... I had a paper route when I was 10.
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Old 09-03-06, 08:16 AM
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Originally Posted by LA_Rider
I’m a former pro cyclist... I had a paper route when I was 10.
Me too. I had to pick up supplies at Home Depot for work.
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Old 09-03-06, 08:36 AM
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Messenger Groupies? Bwaha ha ha! Your killing me Pedex. The guys and girls you drink with at the bar on Friday night are not groupies. The folks you see riding a fixie and carrying a beat up messenger bag are not posers they are commuters, or students, or they put in their ten years of messengering, got their degrees and now have families to support. Unless you see someone delivering imaginary packages there is no such thing as a posenger. You have no monopoly on messenger utilitarian fashion. It existed before you were born and will carry on long after you are gone because dressing comfortably on a bike for a combo of riding, walking, running, and casual social situations works for students, commuters, and messengers. You should be happy everytime you see someone on a bike, no matter how they are dressed.
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Old 09-03-06, 08:37 AM
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Originally Posted by daytonian
So every Oriental that drives those tri wheeled "rickshaws" in Asian cities is a pro pedaling cyclist?? lol
As Ron White would say "I don't think so SCOOTER"
if you consider a rickshaw pedaler a "cyclist" then yes absolutely, its what they do for a living, and many people who ride for a living do so more often and more of it than lots of "pro racers"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Professional


Another guy above says the dilineating factor is a uscf or uci license and race in the pro category, you can do one race all stinking year and lose miserably and thats a "pro"????????? As far as the licensing issue goes, that does happen in some cities for messengers and the bike or biker gets tagged same with alot of the other forms of commercial riding. Heck we've got a guy here that races in the pro category all the time, but he makes 99.999% of his cash as a messenger, he's been doing it full time for at least 6 years that I know of, which is he?Pro racer or pro biker period. We can toss around defintions and you guys can get your lycra all in a bunch over it and it doesnt bother me a bit, its a cycling forum, people are going to be snobbish and uptight, it goes with the territory Doesnt change anything, doesnt taint the "sport" in any way, it is what it is.

*************
@Patentcad, yes there are friggin groupies, they show up at alot of the alleycats, follow and hang out with messengers at bars and concerts, it happens. Here locally its mostly the urban starving artist types, its part of the messenger subculture. You see lots of people riding bikes setup like many of us messengers ride wearing messenger bags those are the posengers, and like rec riders they think its cool to look like a certain group of riders which ride for a living.Get your head out of your butt and get out in the world and you might learn these things. You hear about some of this stuff on the SS/fixed gear forum occasionally.

******************************
One thing I do know, those that have raced and those that have done messenger work have a bit more respect for what it means to ride for a living, maybe some of you should try it for a minute before you start dissing it, many of you wouldnt last a week.
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Old 09-03-06, 08:45 AM
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Originally Posted by pedex
One thing I do know, those that have raced and those that have done messenger work have a bit more respect for what it means to ride for a living, maybe some of you should try it for a minute before you start dissing it, many of you wouldnt last a week.
you're a very well balanced guy.

you've got a chip on each shoulder
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