Originally Posted by jankon73

I await the amusing FARK headline describing your imminent failure.

Seriously, take a step back and look at this nonsense:

-No previous biking experience,
-No bike or bike repair knowledge,
-A plan that could not be more vague,
-"Start in Egypt and head south",
-"I am hella brave and lucky".

Lucky?! Oh dear....

As much as I appreciate your aspirations and motivation, you would be a fool to seriously consider such a trip right now. You need to do some serious research and training before you jump into this nonsense, otherwise, you are inevitably destined for a long, sobering walk back. That is, if injury or death doesn't get you first.
Because you work in an 'outdoors store' does not mean you have the knowledge or experience necessary for such an expedition. Your nievete astounds me.

Get the facts, get the experience, get the knowledge, get a PLAN.
Save the people the time, effort, and expense of conducting the search and rescue mission.

...and if this is a joke, well played! You duped me!