Bike Forums - C&V bulwer-lytton thread

OK splitting this off from another thread.....air quality is too bad to ride (northern california fires) and waiting for caulk to cure so

Let see the literary creativity of C&V with bulwer-lytton thread (he is the author famous for "it was a dark and stormy night" which has inspired this https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/

I will start with this...feel free to add, delete, create your own and otherwise torture the English Language

It was a dark and stormy ride, through the desolation of suburbia, on his trusty, but not rusty, classic velocipede, showing it's vintage ethos, as he pedaled to the hiss of chain and chirping of crickets, he was content writing his story via his quill stem and the path of the tires, floating like a wraith on the smoothness of tubular tires.