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Non-"swear" word swear words...

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Non-"swear" word swear words...

Old 01-05-15, 01:32 PM
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mechanicmatt
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Non-"swear" word swear words...

Being that it is cold as "Heck" outside and a goal of mine for the new year is to cuss less due to the kids now being at the word understanding level, I am in desperate need of some good swear word replacements to increase my vocabulary with. Phrases too would be appreciated. I have to have some way to say it is so "Gosh Darn" cold out there. I spent too many years in factories, machine shops, and bike stores to not have something to say as a go-to for those times I stub my toe and what not.

Examples I know:
  • Gosh Darn
  • Heck
  • Cheese and Rice
  • Goooooood Night

Feel free to use them in appropriate sentences or whatever too. And happy new year to all too!
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Old 01-05-15, 01:37 PM
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Dag nabbit
Con sarnit
Fffffffudge
Shut the fffffront door
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Old 01-05-15, 01:41 PM
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No, I'm not teaching you any the excellent Dutch vocabulary on this, developed during many centuries on a miserable, rainy, cold piece of the earth
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Old 01-05-15, 01:42 PM
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Son of a biscuit eater!


You could always start a "**** it Bucket" and every time you slip up, put in a dollar. At least finance your next bit of bike bling that way.

Last edited by Mark Stone; 01-07-15 at 06:59 AM. Reason: Please do not bypass the forum censors :-)
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Old 01-05-15, 02:02 PM
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I use- mother of pearl ! And the spouse says- god bless america!

But my absolute fave? Phil Dunphy "Son of Jor El !"
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Old 01-05-15, 02:11 PM
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My wife and I use the expression;

"That ain't workin'" which is a brief portion of the lyric in a Dire Straint's song, Money for Nothing, released in 1985.

The full lyric for that section is:
Originally Posted by MetroLyrics
I want my
I want my MTV

Now look at them yo-yo's that's the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Money for nothin' and your chicks for free
Now that ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Let me tell ya them guys ain't dumb
Maybe get a blister on your little finger
Maybe get a blister on your thumb
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Old 01-05-15, 02:21 PM
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"There's your problem"
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Old 01-05-15, 02:21 PM
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As a kid, I remember learning pretty quickly what adults meant to say when they'd use cutesy substitutes.
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Old 01-05-15, 02:29 PM
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Originally Posted by pastorbobnlnh View Post
My wife and I use the expression;

"That ain't workin'" which is a brief portion of the lyric in a Dire Straint's song, Money for Nothing, released in 1985.

The full lyric for that section is:
Awesome...I will definitely start using this.
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Old 01-05-15, 02:29 PM
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For a while I was using "bugger". Figured it wasn't cursing if it wasn't 'merican cursing. Then, one of my students heard me say it when I dropped something in class and thought I'd said "aw, butters" and that became a big joke to the point where I had to find something new.
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Old 01-05-15, 02:45 PM
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Old 01-05-15, 02:52 PM
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Sorry, not being around children I don't have to watch my language, so I don't. No advice here.
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Old 01-05-15, 03:30 PM
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Originally Posted by Dan Burkhart View Post
Dan: my favourite of all time.....
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Old 01-05-15, 03:31 PM
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what the mess!
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Old 01-05-15, 03:38 PM
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Originally Posted by Italuminium View Post
No, I'm not teaching you any the excellent Dutch vocabulary on this, developed during many centuries on a miserable, rainy, cold piece of the earth
I'm not sure anyone swears better than the Dutch. I used to work in a factory in Putten where we made pipe hangers for the north sea oil industry. A few of the guys in the shop spoke English and they taught me the ropes on the job. I learned all the technical words I needed for the job pretty fast which included an extensive vocabulary of curse words. They still come in handy from time to time!
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Old 01-05-15, 03:43 PM
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Go forth and multiply.
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Old 01-05-15, 03:51 PM
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My favorite: There is a copmmunity in my county called Blooming. 2 miles west is a north-south road called Fern Hill Rd. You can ride around the end of the Chehalem hills completely on flat ground; about 4 miles. Or you can take the shortcut. Blooming Fern Hill Rd, 2 miles. The English "correct" expletive of "Bloomin'" describes that hill perfectly!

Ben
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Old 01-05-15, 03:55 PM
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Originally Posted by bikemig View Post
I'm not sure anyone swears better than the Dutch. I used to work in a factory in Putten where we made pipe hangers for the north sea oil industry. A few of the guys in the shop spoke English and they taught me the ropes on the job. I learned all the technical words I needed for the job pretty fast which included an extensive vocabulary of curse words. They still come in handy from time to time!
Oh, yes, we're quite florid. I've never been anywhere in the world so foul mouthed.

Funny enough, most countries swear in certain categories: genitals, excrements, etc.

The dutch do all of them. Plus diseases. No other country does diseases. No. 42: Swearing with diseases
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Old 01-05-15, 03:58 PM
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I can tell that no sailors have yet replied.
And the Brits should be able to give us some of that slang.

'you sun on a beach?!' - with emphasis onna da 'beach', used quite regularly when in Italy, tho it's been a while.

Last edited by Wildwood; 01-05-15 at 04:01 PM.
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Old 01-05-15, 03:58 PM
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Bloody fregin' snail

SMUCKERS! - this is a family joke. When my oldest was a toddler she had trouble with certain pronunciations. Smart became Fart. For some reason SM always came out as F. We had a lot of fun with that.
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Old 01-05-15, 04:02 PM
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Fish and shrimp! It provides the same syllaballic relief....
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Old 01-05-15, 04:12 PM
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My favorite is; Aw Shucks.
And nobody can say it better than Jimi does than at the 2:41 mark.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FPjmHtE7jdA

Love Dire Straights. But I listened to your YouTube of it and it's not the original song.
This is the original song and I never knew it has been edited.
Please don't listen is easily offended.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tTmpzfyChw




Originally Posted by pastorbobnlnh View Post
My wife and I use the expression;

"That ain't workin'" which is a brief portion of the lyric in a Dire Straint's song, Money for Nothing, released in 1985.

The full lyric for that section is:

Last edited by Midtown; 01-05-15 at 08:15 PM.
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Old 01-05-15, 04:25 PM
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Originally Posted by markk900 View Post
Dan: my favourite of all time.....
The porky pig swears video was so unexpected it almost had me in tears.
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Old 01-05-15, 04:26 PM
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Somewhere along the line I picked up "Oh dear." Oh, how my wife hates to hear that.
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Old 01-05-15, 04:33 PM
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Like "Gee You En" (which isn't actually a swear word but you can't type out the word on this forum)?

Chances are your child has been at the word recognition stage longer than you realize. I remember being startled when my then 2-year old daughter said "doosh-bag" (sic) in proper context. I knew instantly she'd picked up that gem from her mother, most likely overhead in the car.

Keeping with the C&V theme, "flipper" may be a good substitute.

I've got a few that I'd rather not repeat on a public forum.

****
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