You know your a clyde when....
 

...people call you a ford(fast only rolling downhill).

There are plenty of clydes who are fast on the flat. Maybe not so many fast uphill.

You know you're a Clyde when that skinny weight weenie who blew past you up the last hill, immediately tucks in behind you when you encounter high headwinds :)

lol lets keep me coming!

When riding in a headwind you have the aerodymanic properties of a 4x8 sheet of plywood.

Yeah, but dang we make good wind breaks and run like diesels.

LOL

When riding with my wife, I actually like headwinds. When I'm leading (always), it's about the only time she speaks fondly of me...

When you make balloon tires look like road racing tires.

A guy passing you up a steep hill calls out kudos to you, and he's jogging.

(Happened to me last Saturday, it was about 12%)

... Grandma drops you. On her Hoveround.
... The last bike you passed was a sculpture.
... You don't need brakes on a windy day. Just sit upright and come to a stop in short order.

and best of all

... You don't take yourself so seriously that you forget to have FUN on the bike.

I'm 506th of 510 on a Strava segment. All the rest used their bikes and I am on foot :)

.2 mile with 56'gain (4.6%). I'm only 1:34 behind the leader

When you use every last cog on your cassette, and the road isn't even that hilly.

When your average speed is 16, but you spent most of your ride going 5 or 30.

When you try on a XXL jersey, thinking it will be really loose, and it fits. Snugly.

You know your a clyde when....
 

...your saddle is feeling down after a ride. :)

...that tattoo of a snake you got on your calf before you were a clyde now looks like a tattoo of Bibendum. (If you don't know who that is, look "him" up.

:lol:

Hey, that's me, only my average is only 6 and 50% of the ride I am doing 25 and 50% of the ride I'm doing 3. It took me 20 minutes to ride the last half mile back up to my house. Yes, it is that hilly. Non-stop up and down hills.

lol it sounds like I'm riding in the best place possible for an uber clyde... my 30 mile ride yesterday had 71ft of elevation gain... if I want to get climbing into a ride I have to ride over bridges

When low spoke count wheels quiver at the sight of you...

When you can make steel frames creak...

...the LBS guys automatically point you to the Surly section..

When you believe the "FFF" on Surly frames applies to you and not the tires...

I never even realised this until lately, when a friend of mine refers to rides around my town as "spin class", because "they're so flat I stay in the same gear the whole time, like I'm taking a spin class".

... I use 2 chainrings and 10 cogs for the same terrain :(

I use all my gears when riding....no shame. Makes me feel like a fighter jet pilot!




You know you're a clyde when...

...Smart cars draft you.
...during a sprint or climb your full carbon frame flexes like a lug steel frame.
...you laugh at skinny riders talking about the grams they saved by swapping out pedals.
...after losing some weight your clothes are as ill fitting as they were BEFORE the weight loss.
...after losing weight someone asked you where you were able to buy parachute pants, you nonchalantly respond they aren't parachute pants but "fat pants".

When you've been riding pretty seriously for 10 years and you're still looking forward to passing another bike rider for the first time. Is it like passing a walker??

When the 12'yearold on his walmart bike flys past you on the hill(that your running out of gears for).

- your 23mm tires leave grooves in the pavement
- Team Krispy Kreme offers you a free jersey
- children ride in your shade on hot days
- you reach your target heart rate putting on your spandex
- you ride over a manhole cover and it tacos

LOL - Now that is funny

That guy must have been ahead of me a couple of days ago. Saw the track for at least ten miles.