Revenge of the SUV
 

Being careful not to make any stereotypical assumptions, I have a sports-ute story.

I got buzzed by an extra-long Ram SUV this morning. There was a car double-parked ahead of us, and I guess the driver didn't want to get stuck behind me at the bottleneck -- I don't know. Anyway, he guns it and pulls in front of me within 20 feet. And he ends up stuck at the bottleneck, 30 feet ahead. And halfway in the bike lane. Now, after last week's illuminating discussion of SUV's and their drivers, I had to consider: Is this guy a contractor late for a job? I'm sure he didn't mean to nearly clip me just to stall in my lane. Naturally, as I passed by, I tried to peer into tinted driver's window. I couldn't see a thing. Not really rubbing it in, just a glance in passing. I'm not ten feet away before I hear the unmistakable local dialect*: FOCK YOOOO! HEY! A••hole! FOCK YOOOO!
He's stuck in traffic, and apart from him, the rest of the bike lane is empty. What would you do?
I gave a friendly wave and shouted, "Catch me!" Knowing he couldn't. Of course, I did get a decent workout making absolutely sure he couldn't.





*New Yorkers, a dialect question: Is this Bensonhurst, do you think? Or Mill Basin pretending to be Bensonhurst?

Depends on how he said "***hole". ;)

Sounds more like "Revenge of the Cyclist." Like you, I'd be tempted to yell back, "Enjoy the traffic, dips***!" but I'd probably just look him in the eye, shake my head and ride away.

Anyway, isn't what he said just the NYC way of saying hello?

wait... what upset him?

I always waggle my little finger in a small willy gesture. Drives people wild!

Nothing. Confrontation is not worth the risk. I'm convinced a sizeable portion of the population (~10%) suffer from anger control issues that are often expressed in traffic situations. You don't want to fan that flame.

You sure it's your little finger?

Of the five motorists I can remember confronting, two apoligized (the only women), one ignored me, and two went into rage mode. One tried to run me off the road, then pulled ahead and jumped out of his SUV to "teach me a lesson". I got the whole thing on vidcam (including tag #) and turned it over to the cops. They had a nice long talk with the azzhole.

I think your ~10% guestimate is on the shy side - at least when it comes to Y chromosomes.

That guy was angry at the world and yelled at the only person who could hear him. Drivers yell at everyone else on the road, not just cyclists. It's just that we hear them.

He was prolly so upset about having to pass you, then getting stuck, then you passing him, that he just wigged when you glanced at him.

On the other hand, are you sure he was yelling at you?

OT- BillH, did you have to use one of those pics as your avatar??? Man, I've been having nightmares about them since I saw them the other day.

Thank God you didn't use the pic of the little girl. It's just....freaky.

Did he say "Asssss hole" or "Azzzz hole"? If he said the former it's Bensonhurst.

Wow, you nailed it so concisely! That's it. Exactly.


EDIT: And Neezy, no, I didn't say anything.

I've seen drivers (and usually SUVs) flip when they go through a lot of effort to pass me, and then get stuck in traffic, allowing you to pass them to never be seen again.

The worst one for me was when an SUV had expended all that effort and gas one day, only to get stuck, so when he saw me trucking up the shoulder in his passenger side mirror he pulled his vehicle sideways on the road to block the shoulder too. I didn't understand the mentality that would drive someone to do that. Does it matter so much? Does it impact his day so much that my bike is about to pass his "big bad testosterone mobile"? I just don't understand the "I own the road" mentality, and at the risk of inviting flames from certain parties, it does seem to come mostly from SUV and giant pickup truck drivers. Since many of the owners of these vehicles tell me they own them to "feel safe", i.e. in a horrible accident the other guy will die when confronted by their tank, but not them, it says to me that they already have a view of driving as a kind of urban combat, in which their SUV or truck is simply a "logical" extenstion of the ever escalating traffic arms race.

Referencing your previous thread, Bklyn, didn't ILTB ream you enough about vilifying the SUV? :D Prepare yourself for another broadside against your "effette liberal notions".

Pulled his vehicle sideways to block the shoulder? I hope you picked up your bike cyclocross style, ran around in front, gave him a wave, then got back on.

There... I fixed it for ya.

I've had this a few times. I had passed and been passed by a beat up Chevy (car) at least a half dozen times, mainly because traffic lights every few blocks kept the average speed at about 25 mph, as I went to past them the last time the passenger opened the door to block the shoulder. I was coasting as the light was red anyway so I just came to a stop hoped up on the curb and went around and was back on the shoulder, total delay was <5 s. I was still six or seven cars ahead of them at the traffic light when it turned green. Never saw them again.

If this had happened at speed I bet it could have hurt, but my overweight self probably would have taken off the door as well.

There are certain personalities that seem to get really bent out of shape about right filtering. Seems to be the same type that will go to any length to get around me as quickly as possible. This is one of the reasons I won't right filter if I know I can get through the light on the first round.

An intentional dooring could qualify as an assault...depending on speed and conditions, it could be charged as a felony. A swift kick to their door would be an appropriate response, IMO.

:p :eek: :p I have been chuckling about that thread since yesterday! Probley cause I grew up in that era. I never was forced to wear one of those masks but wore equally cute/ freaky gear like Daniel Boone coonskin caps and Lone Ranger boots. :D

On one of my routes I had gotten tired of people passing on the right or worse, driving for a half mile in the bike lane. I'm guessing on the pretense of making a right turn at the light. Anyway, one day it happened where someone got tired of sitting in traffic and pulled out into the bike lane right behind me. So I stopped pedalling and just coasted slower and slower until I was trackstanding. I made her wait for a good 30 seconds just stopped there. And then I gave her The Look and took off.

Trying to save a little time? Too bad.

Here in San Diego I had nearly the same thing happen... at this intersection where I actually go on the interstate shoulder for a brief time to the next exit. So there are 2 lanes and an on ramp lane... and the bike lane. Well traffic was well backed up due to a pro golf tournament (Torrey Pines... for you golfers) and the motorists were getting desperate and started turning 2 lanes into 3, well before the on ramp. SDPD put a motorcycle cop there and he directed those in the BL to get back into their own lane.

If they could smoothly get on to the on ramp and not block the BL, I would not have cared, but they were backed up on the BL and just stopped all the traffic... So SDPD decided bikes should not be blocked... I loved it.

Picture this: Traffic is backed up on the little 2 lane main drag through town, and at a traffic light some guy in a truck has pulled into the intersection just far enough through his right turn off a side street to be blocking the bike lane (before he got jammed up on the rear of the traffic line on the main drag.) My light is green (coming through the main drag) so I cut behind him through the intersection. As I'm doing this the car behind him (on my right) jumps forward, (trying to sandwich me? foot slipped off the brake? I don't know.) They missed me as I zipped through, but just as I passed I heard the crunch as the car hit the truck's rear bumper.

In my younger days I probably would have feigned stumbling, hopped off the bike, and "accidentally" driven my shoulder hard into the door bending it completely around to face forward. Then I'd hop back up and demand to know why they would do such a thing. Or maybe also appologize in a very exagerated manner. And ride off.

or use it as an opportunity to jump in and grab the keys.

Fixed it for ya. :)

I haven't had any issues right filtering. I do pick and choose where and how far I filter, though. If a drivers seems impatient or agressive, I often just leave them be.