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What to tell Mom

Old 10-19-09, 12:22 PM
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echotraveler
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What to tell Mom

Hello guys,

My name is Arturo and i live in San Juan Puerto Rico.

ive been commuting for a month now! and im super super happy!
I ride a Moulton from 1965 6 miles each way, and have a great route that incorporates 50% parks 50% traffic infested st.'s.

I moved out of my parents house like 4 years ago, and my 1st priority to rate a place is "how many places can i walk to from home"... Puerto Rico was well planned on the 50's but then a construction boom simply destoyed any urban sense.

@some point in time the island had a well developed rail system and trolly carts on all municipality's...then the car boom came and ALL TROLLY AND TRAIN were sold because they were considered "TRAFFIC JAmmers"!! stupidity and corrupt influence at their best!

Now i commute in a car obsesed society were 4 million people, in a 100 mile x 35 mile island, own 2.5 million cars

My mom went nuts when i told her that i commuted to work. Shes super worried, and i simply give her the silent treatment... i dont know how to react to her, so far ive told her "i ride safe, with lights and helmete, alway being carefull, using the bus lane and parks when i can" but is simply such a shock for her car dependent mind!...i bet shes asking herself what can make me want to workout if i have a car! lol

anyone had to deal with this? i understand workplace people find us weird, but moms are a different story.

I dont see anyone commute, around me, and its sad, but im giving the example!
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Old 10-19-09, 12:27 PM
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Arturo, mucho gusto!!

Personally, if I were you I would explain to her your own rationale for deciding to commute. I mean I am sure you realized the risk of commuting and weighed out its pros and cons before you settled on doing it. Tell her how you realized commuting was the way to go and I am sure she will back you up.

Suerte!
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Old 10-19-09, 12:45 PM
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Your mom is just being a mom...

Do your best to reassure her, but realize that she is acting out of emotion - and not necessarily reason. Don't give her the silent treatment; continue to tell her what you're doing to be safe. Still, don't expect her to suddenly be comfortable with your cycling lifestyle.

This is new to her. Eventually she will come to terms with your choice. She'll also never quit worrying...
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Old 10-19-09, 12:54 PM
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Show your mom that you take safety seriously, show her your helmet (I am sure she'll like that), tell her that you go through a lot of parks where it's safe. etc. If she has the feeling that you take safety seriously, she will feel comfortable with your choice, I am sure.

Good luck.
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Old 10-19-09, 12:55 PM
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What part of PR are you in?
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Old 10-19-09, 12:58 PM
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I sounds like you gave her the best reasonable explanation that you can. As long as you go for awhile without getting hurt, she should calm down.

I rode for years out in the suburbs without hurting myself, so by the time I started commuting in the city my mom wasn't worried, but that's sort of an isolated situation.

That island sounds like the perfect candidate for a great mass transportation system I'm surprised that the island government let the old system fall apart. They'll realize soon enough that its much more efficient when gas isn't super cheap anymore.
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Old 10-19-09, 01:19 PM
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Isn't it ironic that people drive cars, and think bicycling is dangerous because of all the cars?

I moved out of my parents house like 25 years ago, and my mom still worries about all my bicycling. Meanwhile, I worry about her driving.
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Old 10-19-09, 01:21 PM
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Thanx guys, my mom is a really good mom i cant be angry at her, even if i do feel a bit angry when she questions my commuting lifestyle (thats why a stay silent). ill repeat and repeat how safe i ride..and i will practice safety seriously.

Originally Posted by ModoVincere View Post
What part of PR are you in?
Old San Juan and Metro Area...do you live here?

Originally Posted by JakcBeNimble View Post
That island sounds like the perfect candidate for a great mass transportation system I'm surprised that the island government let the old system fall apart. They'll realize soon enough that its much more efficient when gas isn't super cheap anymore.
thats what im telling everybody, lets wait till GAS gos really really wild! 3x the crisis from last year. then ill see many ditch the car and buy a bike! my route is very safe, at least you have MANY choices to move around by bus train boat car bike walk....it all depends were you want to go....but most places outside of san juan demand a CAR ONLY lifestyle, not because places are far away, simply because its COMPLETLY planned for cars...


bicycling is pretty popular nowadays...but only as a sport or recreational...thats a good thing, some bike paths have been made for leasure purposes, and are quite delightfull.
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Old 10-19-09, 01:49 PM
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Treat her well. That she says it means she loves you. You may never convince her that cycling is safe. But the good part is that she will still love you and that you are old enough to make your own decisions.

Guaranteed, not all your decisions will please your parents. But for me, following the bicycle has been one of the wisest decisions I ever made in my life.
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Originally Posted by Bjforrestal View Post
I don't care if you are on a unicycle, as long as you're not using a motor to get places you get props from me. We're here to support each other. Share ideas, and motivate one another to actually keep doing it.
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Old 10-19-09, 01:50 PM
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In the US, riding a bicycle is less likely to get you killed than driving a car, and that's BEFORE you factor in that it will also make you healthier and less likely to get diabetes, heart disease and cancer. However, though all those latter things are true anywhere, I'm not sure whether or not the safety statistics are valid for PR.
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Old 10-19-09, 04:35 PM
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Since you've been living independently for four years, it's none of your mother's business. Period. You are (assumably) an adult. Your life is your own to lead as you wish.*

tl;dr: don't be a momma's boy.
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Old 10-19-09, 05:32 PM
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my parents are motorcyclists, and feel that "if it doesn't have a motor, it doesn't go on the roads." on this, and other issues, we agree to disagree.
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Old 10-19-09, 05:42 PM
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Well, I don't know what to tell you to tell your mom (as others have said, mothers worry... It's what they do), but I do know that I'd love to see a picture of your bike. I have a soft spot for bikes that are older than I am.
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Old 10-19-09, 08:54 PM
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Originally Posted by wneumann View Post
Well, I don't know what to tell you to tell your mom (as others have said, mothers worry... It's what they do), but I do know that I'd love to see a picture of your bike. I have a soft spot for bikes that are older than I am.


yesterday i put some marathon plus tires, bought and old english ring ring bell (was all rusty but oxalic acid is my friend!)...and am waiting for new rims spokes bynohub lights..
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Old 10-19-09, 09:09 PM
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Dont talk about safety. Tell her you do it that way because you enjoy it. Do the out of town roads have paved shoulders?
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Old 10-19-09, 10:15 PM
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What to tell mom?

Tell her you love her and give her a kiss everytime you see her of course. Moms have been known to still love their bicycle riding kids even if they do worry about them.
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Old 10-19-09, 10:18 PM
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Tell your mom that more people die of heart disease than cycling.
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Old 10-19-09, 11:11 PM
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There are many true facts and statistics you can tell your mom, but the real truth you should tell her is this:
That you are now a man and you now make your own decisions. Period.
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Old 10-20-09, 01:47 AM
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Supercool bike - I love the integrated racks.
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Old 10-20-09, 05:03 AM
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Just let her ride your Moulton- if they ride as well as I`ve been led to believe she`ll be so happy she won`t ever bother you again.
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Old 10-20-09, 06:49 AM
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A month before my mom died, she said to me, "I'm the mommy, I'm supposed to worry!"

Be glad that you still have her love and concern in your life, and let love guide you in your response.
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Old 10-20-09, 08:03 AM
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You look early twenties? This is not the issue to "make a stand" be stubborn and declare your emancipation. That's rather childish and should be saved for ultimatums should they ever occur.
Be kind but firm and don't argue. Perhaps ask her if it would help to give a quick call upon reaching destination. She'll eventually get used to it.
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Old 10-20-09, 11:45 AM
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Statistics won't help.
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Old 10-20-09, 12:04 PM
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ive decided to call her everyday from work just to ask how shes doing, not telling her i biked for now...she knows i biked, cause when i don't bike to work all i talk about is how i wanted to ride
im glad shes there to nag...it would be boring to do all i want without someone cautioning me about concecuenses.

im not sure she would want to even try my bike, ive never seen her on a bicycle, ever! i always tell her its never too late. im not sure using death statistics would do much good

i love low center gravity bikes! the racks make this bike a super handy commuter...they add a lot of weight = 'ing more training when i commute... in 2 days ill ride with a roady crowd and well i will take them off and see how much this sudden weight loss helps! i wanna loook my best against their carbon machines
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Old 10-20-09, 01:55 PM
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Oh, man -- that is one cool bike!

By the way, your brief history of urban development on the island applies to every city in America. Suburban boom = nonsense planning.
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