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-   -   A Confession I Must Make to Fellow Avid Commuters and Other Cyclists (https://www.bikeforums.net/commuting/994795-confession-i-must-make-fellow-avid-commuters-other-cyclists.html)

Aznman 02-19-15 11:15 PM

A Confession I Must Make to Fellow Avid Commuters and Other Cyclists
 
Some of you have already known about my use of a secondhand "Ladies" step-through bicycle.
Now that cycling has become my most favorite way of commuting, I want to make another confession just so that I can clear my conscience. I used to have several severe mental disorders, especially Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder and PTSD. A lot of problems my mental disorders have created were solved after I was - thankfully -properly diagnosed by a great psychiatrist and given the right medications. Almost every aspect of my life was improved upon after this long overdue help. Unfortunately, I still have some residual anxiety - causing me to still be bad with conversations and "natural coolness". I do not know how to make the best conversations. I tend to stutter, rudely cut off after my short reply or awkwardly laugh in an attempt to save the conversation. Most often, I know what people expect out of me, and this makes it even worse given that I fail to deliver. It is bad enough that I am an Asian "dudelett" who rides a "step-through" frame. It may be worse given that I may have acted noticeably awkward in public.

Cyclists in Los Angeles are already stereotypically thought of as crazies with no home, fat people looking to lose weight or illegal immigrants with minimum wage jobs. Though I think of myself as being far more lucky than these people (I am not homeless; I do have a car; I lift weights and have muscles; I am a US Citizen; and I am currently going to school), I fear that my social awkwardness, weird bike frame, and some ugly DIY accessories will only add to the bad rap of cycling.

Cycling has done so much for me. So if I have inadvertently ruined the image of cycling for the rest of you, I must sincerely apologize.

kickstart 02-19-15 11:49 PM

In a community where some intentionally create disharmony because of their alleged moral and/or intellectual superiority, those with genuine challenges shouldn't feel the need to apologize for any unintentional misunderstandings.

Hub Spanner 02-20-15 12:27 AM

From my perspective, we got a really big tent. Plenty of room for you. Stay a while.

Saving Hawaii 02-20-15 12:38 AM

You're caring far too much what other people think man. Just ride your bike. It's fun.

mcours2006 02-20-15 05:41 AM

Thanks for your candor. People will have opinions about you regardless of what you do. You can't worry about how others feel about you; how you feel about yourself is the only thing that matters. Know this.

wphamilton 02-20-15 08:14 AM

@Aznman though I know I shouldn't since it sounded heart-felt I had to laugh at this. Most of us share one or all of these features so to me that IS the image of cycling.

" I fear that my social awkwardness, weird bike frame, and some ugly DIY accessories will only add to the bad rap of cycling.

Cycling has done so much for me. So if I have inadvertently ruined the image of cycling for the rest of you, I must sincerely apologize."

alan s 02-20-15 08:20 AM

Yeah, I think you are giving yourself more credit than due. Not sure when cycling ever had that great an image. Pretty much every bike rider contributes to its image, for better or worse. Was there a Golden Age of Cycling? If so, I missed it.

scroca 02-20-15 09:02 AM

Don't apologize. Ride your bike as if you deserved to. You do.

modernjess 02-20-15 09:37 AM

That was fearless dude. Keep pedaling man. You are on the right path.

bigbenaugust 02-20-15 09:45 AM

You're riding, right? On a bicycle? To some form of gainful employment? The rest is details.

Excellent, have a drink and a seat. :)

Now tell us about your DIY accessories... (says the man with the kitty litter bucket pannier)

I-Like-To-Bike 02-20-15 10:08 AM


Originally Posted by alan s (Post 17569910)
Yeah, I think you are giving yourself more credit than due. Not sure when cycling ever had that great an image. Pretty much every bike rider contributes to its image, for better or worse. Was there a Golden Age of Cycling? If so, I missed it.


Originally Posted by bigbenaugust (Post 17570174)
You're riding, right? On a bicycle? To some form of gainful employment? The rest is details.

Excellent, have a drink and a seat.

Now tell us about your DIY accessories... (says the man with the kitty litter bucket pannier)

Exactly, the OP has nothing to apologize about in regards to proper image of cycling.

Dannihilator 02-20-15 11:08 AM

Keep the insulting out of this please.

Siu Blue Wind 02-20-15 11:14 AM

As well as the ganging up and bullying.

wphamilton 02-20-15 11:24 AM

If mods say it comes off as ganging up, then they're probably right, but we're trying to say OP @Aznman sounds like "one of us" and shouldn't need to apologize for it.

TransitBiker 02-20-15 11:34 AM


Originally Posted by Aznman (Post 17569394)
Some of you have already known about my use of a secondhand "Ladies" step-through bicycle.
Now that cycling has become my most favorite way of commuting, I want to make another confession just so that I can clear my conscience. I used to have several severe mental disorders, especially Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder and PTSD. A lot of problems my mental disorders have created were solved after I was - thankfully -properly diagnosed by a great psychiatrist and given the right medications. Almost every aspect of my life was improved upon after this long overdue help. Unfortunately, I still have some residual anxiety - causing me to still be bad with conversations and "natural coolness". I do not know how to make the best conversations. I tend to stutter, rudely cut off after my short reply or awkwardly laugh in an attempt to save the conversation. Most often, I know what people expect out of me, and this makes it even worse given that I fail to deliver. It is bad enough that I am an Asian "dudelett" who rides a "step-through" frame. It may be worse given that I may have acted noticeably awkward in public.

Cyclists in Los Angeles are already stereotypically thought of as crazies with no home, fat people looking to lose weight or illegal immigrants with minimum wage jobs. Though I think of myself as being far more lucky than these people (I am not homeless; I do have a car; I lift weights and have muscles; I am a US Citizen; and I am currently going to school), I fear that my social awkwardness, weird bike frame, and some ugly DIY accessories will only add to the bad rap of cycling.

Cycling has done so much for me. So if I have inadvertently ruined the image of cycling for the rest of you, I must sincerely apologize.

You've not done anything wrong. Just be you. :)

- Andy

treadtread 02-20-15 11:35 AM


Originally Posted by wphamilton (Post 17570566)
If mods say it comes off as ganging up, then they're probably right, but we're trying to say OP @Aznman sounds like "one of us" and shouldn't need to apologize for it.

I imagine this is not w.r.t comments directed at Aznman, but related to the mod-edited post. @OP - DIY bike accessories improve a bike :)

PhotoJoe 02-20-15 12:17 PM

Exactly. The comments about bullying have absolutely NOTHING to do with any responses to the OP, but some inappropriate comments that have been deleted.

caloso 02-20-15 12:20 PM

You ride a bike, you're all right with me.

Aznman 02-20-15 01:23 PM

Thank you for your words of encouragement guys.


Originally Posted by wphamilton (Post 17569898)
@Aznman though I know I shouldn't since it sounded heart-felt I had to laugh at this. Most of us share one or all of these features so to me that IS the image of cycling.

" I fear that my social awkwardness, weird bike frame, and some ugly DIY accessories will only add to the bad rap of cycling.

Cycling has done so much for me. So if I have inadvertently ruined the image of cycling for the rest of you, I must sincerely apologize."

No worries. I was commenting on some stereotypes, so my statements were suppose to be both heart-felt and funny at the same time. I'm glad that I can still entertain some people.

BobbyG 02-20-15 03:54 PM

Aznman-
If as you say "Cycling has done so much for me," then you have inadvertently boosted the image of cycling. It's the poseurs and snobs that ruin the image of cycling, not you.

joeyduck 02-20-15 04:19 PM

Thank you for sharing,it takes a lot to tell more or less strangers these things.

One thing I would like to ask is if you have sought the help of a psychologist, a registered clinical psychologist. They have training and resources to help work on overcoming anxiety and many other things most of us struggle with at some point.

Wanderer 02-20-15 04:32 PM

"They" all think we are all nuts, anyway....... Why should you be any different.....


Have fun on your bike - we do!

TransitBiker 02-20-15 04:49 PM

You should see the look on the faces of people around here when i'm riding in the snow or single digits, they are addicted emotionally to their motorbeasts and cannot fathom how anyone could do without one, let alone in the cold, or at night, or anywhere that isnt a recreational venue.

- Andy

randallovelace 02-21-15 05:48 PM

Keep riding - and on the DIY - have you seen my commuter?

Sullalto 02-23-15 08:01 PM

Why are you apologizing? You've done nothing that warrants an apology.

If I have the money to do build up a bike to commute on, with what I've learned? I'm going to use a mixte or step through frame. No shame.

post the accessories, we love that stuff in this forum.


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