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Big Crash and sister's husband said he's selling the Bike

Old 06-27-16, 05:58 AM
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Big Crash and sister's husband said he's selling the Bike

This thread is about my sister. I've been riding actively for 40 years. Lord knows I've been down a few times, Hit and run once with a nice long hospital stay. Also, lost more skin than I care to think about when riding competitively. My sister is 67 years old. She has been very active on the bike for 4 year now and absolutely loves the benefits of riding, physically and mentally! Last Wednesday she had a horrific crash. Not caused by a motorist just rider error. Results of crash... broken tibia at ankle, serious bruises, knot above eye (she always wears a helmet and gloves) plenty of abrasion. Her husband has threatened to sell her bike or get rid of it!!! He works in a injury law firm and starts siting all the statistics of bike injury and older riders that can't fully recover. My question is... what are the real life stats and cons of riding and not being able to recover from injury as you get older. It appeared to me his real concern was that he didn't want to take care of a vegetable lying in the hospital. Showed very little compassion for my sister and her injuries. It was all about "what am I going to do when you're laying in the hospital not able to take care of yourself." Very self serving in my opinion. What say everyone else about this situation???

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Old 06-27-16, 06:44 AM
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Originally Posted by jgscisum
..... My question is... what are the real life stats and cons of riding and not being able to recover from injury as you get older. .....
It all depends on the individual, since not everyone is alike. I don't know what the stats are but this is what happened to my wife. Last June, my wife tripped over one of her tennis shoes and fell hard. She's 68 and has bilateral hip replacements and sustained a spiral fracture to her right femur around the artificial shaft. The surgery on the femur included a metal plate to reinforce the fracture and some bone grafting. The surgeon said that because of her age and the fact that she has an artificial hip, recovery time would be approximately 8 to 10 weeks before she would be able to walk on it with a full weight bearing load.

Like your sister, my wife also rides every chance she gets, averaging 27 miles per ride on a recumbent trike. We had a 15 day, European river cruise planned six weeks after she fractured her femur and would have taken a fairly good monetary hit had we cancelled, even with travel insurance. Besides that, she really wanted to make this trip and not have to wait until this year to go. We found a really good rehab center that worked with her, extensively, twice a day, every day she was there. The surgeon told her she would be in rehab until she met a certain criteria that he had set for her and it should take about seven weeks. Five weeks and three days later, we were spending a few days in Washington DC, awaiting our flight to Amsterdam. The trip had thirteen scheduled stops with at least a four hour tour at each stop, plus extra evening tours and she did every one of them with minimal pain. The pain was taken care of with ibuprofen and some chemical heat pads. The surgeon attributed her health and cycling to her faster than normal recovery and now uses her experience for his other senior patients.

As for your brother in law, from the statement you posted, it sounds as if he's more concerned about who will take care of him if she's in a hospital rather than who will take care of her. Pretty selfish person.
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Old 06-27-16, 06:55 AM
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it is hard to say... some folks express fear with anger...
It would be hard to judge your brother in law based on your speculations about his reasons.
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Old 06-27-16, 06:57 AM
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I sold my Five DF's after my 16 MPH Brain Injury Crash. Jan 11, 2014

Never want to do that again.

Wife says she never wants to see me in the hospital again.

Medical bills were $94,000.00
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Old 06-27-16, 07:25 AM
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As long as your sister is of sound mind, she can make her own decision about her bike and riding it. IMO.

Stats 50,000 people injured in bicycle crashes with motor vehicles in 2014 (about 10% of all bicycle related ER visits) Traffic Safety Facts out of maybe 10 billion miles ridden. That would be one for every 200,000 miles.

When someone is throwing per capita statistics around to make a point about risk, he needs to relate it to the proportion of people biking in that demographic and the exposure (number of miles they ride). I suspect that the injury attorney brother in law is ignoring the latter. For example the median age of ER patients is rising, but riding by adults is rising while riding by children has been dropping. Claiming that it's becoming more dangerous for adults because of per capita ER stats is therefore incorrect.

One could argue that male riders have 2.7 times the ER visits as do females (without motor vehicle involvement), but that would be making the same error he does. Fewer female riders, going fewer miles.

Similarly, the over 65 crowd rides more miles than anyone else. Characteristics of the Regular Adult Bicycle User - Analysis of data on an aggregate basis So of course they'll have more accidents per person. We're talking median range of 5-7,000 miles, which may be more than what your sister does.

It's true that older riders do have a higher risk of having an accident while biking, and potentially greater severity, but probably not as drastically as your brother in law is portraying it.
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Old 06-27-16, 07:51 AM
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Originally Posted by jgscisum View Post
What say everyone else about this situation???
Don't get between a husband and his wife even if she is your sister.

Love your sister. Visit her as often as you can, help her recover to the extent that you are able and tolerate her husband with a closed mouth, offering your opinion only when asked.

Love both of them. Be there for both of them when they need you.
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Old 06-27-16, 07:59 AM
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Thanks everyone! I live by the sayings, "Silence is Golden" and "Still Waters Run Deep". It is hard sometimes though.
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Old 06-27-16, 08:48 AM
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Here's another data point for your sister and her husband.

I made a similar decision within the past month. So far this year, I've probably taken 10 falls. They were all low or zero speed nothing things but regardless the speed or reason, that's still a lot of falls. I was mentally judging the success of my rides by freedom of falls. That little issue has been gradually building over the last several years. I kept thinking that a little more riding would make it better, but it seemed to be getting worse. Then this year, I had 3 personal friends take falls that resulted in serious injuries. I decided I didn't have to wait for that to happen to me. Time to make a change.

That afternoon Mrs. Grouch and I drove out to the bike shop and bought me a brand new Catrike 559. (Nice trike, by the way.) I'll admit to having serious second thoughts about making that decision. Every time that I ride it, however, I realize how much stress and tension I was experiencing at every single intersection trying to balance and see both ways. I'm back to experiencing care-free riding enjoyment the way that it used to be - just closer to the ground. It's definitely much better than not riding and it's definitely much better than falling.
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Old 06-27-16, 08:53 AM
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Originally Posted by TimothyH View Post
Don't get between a husband and his wife even if she is your sister.

Love your sister. Visit her as often as you can, help her recover to the extent that you are able and tolerate her husband with a closed mouth, offering your opinion only when asked.

Love both of them. Be there for both of them when they need you.
Sound advice.
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Old 06-27-16, 09:11 AM
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A life well lived is risky.

A sister of a good friend of mine is currently in danger of losing her leg () over a poorly healed fracture. How did she break it? Some little kid skated in front of her at an ice rink.
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Old 06-27-16, 09:25 AM
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Originally Posted by jgscisum View Post
Thanks everyone! I live by the sayings, "Silence is Golden" and "Still Waters Run Deep". It is hard sometimes though.

Yeah, this isn't about cycling. There is something deeper going on. Cycling is just an excuse for all this to come out.

Maybe he is angry because his wife goes out on the bike and is getting exercise without him.

"what am I going to do when you're laying in the hospital not able to take care of yourself."
He is feeling very alone. My guess is that he is a little out of shape and a bit jealous. Just a guess though. Whatever is going on, this isn't about riding bikes. There is more to it.

Sometimes we have to stand back and let the train wreck. If we get in the way we get hurt too. Sometimes the best we can do is help pick up the pieces after the wreck.

Maybe get them a gift certificate to a romantic restaurant? I dunno.


-Tim-

Last edited by TimothyH; 06-27-16 at 09:29 AM.
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Old 06-27-16, 10:00 AM
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Originally Posted by obed7 View Post
some folks express fear with anger...
+1

I've also noticed the more some one is dependent on sombody, the more resentment towards them.
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Old 06-27-16, 10:35 AM
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cycology.
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Old 06-27-16, 10:54 AM
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Knee jerk reaction on the part of hubby. I imagine that there will be more productive discussions during healing.

The alternative is sitting in your chair watching judge shows all day - that's definitely not safe or healthy.
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Old 06-27-16, 12:10 PM
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Made a similar decision back in 2003 after two nasty crashes that didn't result in any broken bones but did produce two massive hematomas that hurt like hell for weeks and made it hard to work or sleep. I didn't want to give up cycling but also realized that another crash like that could break a hip so I bought a recumbent trike. I'm on my third trike and have over 40,000 miles with no crashes and no more nasty hematomas. I still have a stable of mostly unused two wheeled bikes. This could be a solution that allowed for still riding and getting all of the benefits from doing it. Good recumbent trikes are $$$$ but well worth the cost.

Sounds like her lawyer husband is a real AH.
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Old 06-27-16, 12:24 PM
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I'm looking at this at a complete different angle. Thankfully I'm learning by listening to Ya'll. Because my reaction would be to straighten that brother in law out.
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Old 06-27-16, 04:28 PM
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Yep, The BIL needs to chill and let his wife live life. To quote someone on this board: "there is no practice life."
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Old 06-27-16, 04:39 PM
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Originally Posted by wphamilton View Post
Similarly, the over 65 crowd rides more miles than anyone else. Characteristics of the Regular Adult Bicycle User - Analysis of data on an aggregate basis So of course they'll have more accidents per person. We're talking median range of 5-7,000 miles, which may be more than what your sister does.
One could argue ANYTHING if willing to cite as evidence a so-called study as poorly conceived and as half baked as this one, based on a self selecting response sampling technique and as unrepresentative of the over 65 crowd as well as the general cycling population, as this one, and that is over 40 years old for good measure.

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Old 06-27-16, 04:41 PM
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Originally Posted by takenreasy View Post
Yep, The BIL needs to chill and let his wife live life. To quote someone on this board: "there is no practice life."
Perhaps the brother should do the same
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Old 06-27-16, 05:06 PM
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I can't judge the guy's motivations and some folks do express concern in odd ways, but I can sympathize with the basic sentiment. I have to be honest, if I didn't ride and my wife did and she was seriously injured I really think I would not want her to ride again. And the fears would increase as we got older. No matter how strong my fears I wouldn't demand she stop riding (or threaten to sell her bike), but I suspect I would be making the case against riding as strongly as I could. I think that's pretty natural.
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Old 06-27-16, 05:11 PM
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If the BiL truly loves his wife he would value her happiness above everything. If riding her bike makes her happy and keeps her fit (as long as she keeps the rubber down) then he should honor that and actually do whatever he can to help her get back on the bike.
I've had several crashes but my wife knows how much riding means to me and even though she worries she would never try to keep me off the bike. For my part I put all my rides on live track so she can see where I am and that I'm moving. After my last crash I was a bit gun shy about getting back out there and she set up a trip to one of my favorite places to ride to shake it off. She's a keeper.
I never understood the I love you the way you are now change mindset. Just on it's face your BiL seems more self centered than anything.
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Old 06-27-16, 05:14 PM
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Originally Posted by obed7 View Post
it is hard to say... Some folks express fear with anger...
It would be hard to judge your brother in law based on your speculations about his reasons.
x2...
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Old 06-27-16, 05:57 PM
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B.I.L. is in a situation where he sees a lot of bad results and horrendomas. Can't fault his POV, especially in view of severity of
the injury of the sister. Locally in the past 8 months there have been 5 riders knocked down with two hip fractures and two
fractures of the small bones of the pelvis. A 5th rider crash resulted in rib fx and collapsed lung. One couple has not been
back on the bike since her fall. Worst case locally was uninsured driver hitting cyclist: extensive leg injuries with 4-5 surgeries
and ultimately above knee amputation. All involved (except one) people in their 60s. Only one was car involved. I can fully
understand hanging up or selling the bike(s) after a serious injury with a long recovery time to a lower level of function than
prior to the injury.
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Old 06-27-16, 06:49 PM
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Older people are more fragile. Be focussed, be careful.
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Old 06-27-16, 07:05 PM
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Originally Posted by TimothyH View Post
Don't get between a husband and his wife even if she is your sister.

Love your sister. Visit her as often as you can, help her recover to the extent that you are able and tolerate her husband with a closed mouth, offering your opinion only when asked.

Love both of them. Be there for both of them when they need you.
Best advice ever!
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