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My Soulmate but nevertheless not my Wingman!

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My Soulmate but nevertheless not my Wingman!

Old 01-04-21, 12:13 AM
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5 mph
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My Soulmate but nevertheless not my Wingman!

Just curious. Is your Better Half your Wingman?
Everyone has a different life.
This is mine. Years back, money was tight and I often visited Pick and Pull yards so we could keep four cars running. I'd come out greasy , sweaty, slimey , often with torn clothes, sometimes even cuts.
Talk about an "Earthy" experience.
Many times, my Better Half, with a Degree from a good school and many would be Suitors in pursuit back in college, would come along and wait for me in the car.
She actually wanted to come in the Yard with me to help but I was adamant in saying "No" everytime.

That's the same very reason I dont want her Riding alongside me everyday.

Only if you're a Daily all Weather all Condition Rider will you understand why.
Because for us it's an "Earthy" experience....I 'm sure you all endure some combination of 2 inches of 40 degree Western Washington winter rain , Dodge RAM trucks inches from the handlebars, huge mud puddles, numb hands, hypothermic soaked feet , mud all over your clothes, fogged up glasses or visors, swerving to avoid huge tree branches from last night's storm unexpectedly in the bike lane, potholes hidden in puddles...and yes, that childish impulse to race another rider..just like a guide dog who suddenly chases a bird..
Yes she would come with me, but once again the answer is "No". Once more, she's not going into the Yard.

Last edited by 5 mph; 01-04-21 at 01:51 AM.
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Old 01-04-21, 07:25 AM
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Iíve got a wife. Almost 35 yrs this 2nd time.
Donít accompany her to manicures, pedicures, hair appts. I prefer not to join on Costco expeditions. I do not attend her Book Club sessions, sewing group, etc. Our relaxation routines differ.

Whatís a soulmate?
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Old 01-04-21, 08:07 AM
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I treat my woman as she wants to be treated. We are equals...partners...and I am the better for it. She thinks she is too.
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Old 01-04-21, 12:31 PM
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We do a ton of stuff together. She rides her own motorcycle, gravel bike and we ride together sometimes. We sail and camp together. She doesn’t ride road bicycle with me because she can’t keep up. But we sometimes start at the same time and meet up again at pre arranged time.

Now, she doesn’t reload or go shooting with me and you couldn’t get her to scuba dive either. Her choice. She knows she’s welcome on any of my adventures.

No problem with getting ‘earthy’. Just shower before bedtime.
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Old 01-04-21, 12:33 PM
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We've been partners, business as well as life, for 47 years. We do everything together, except now during the pandemic only one of us goes out at a time, and that not very often. We quit riding separate singles outside and bought a tandem in '07. Now we only ride our tandem outside and the singles are relegated to trainer and rollers indoors, though we do that together, too. Having company is a good inducement to get on a trainer. It is a little weird now, knowing that so many people are stressed by this confinement and lack of interaction with friends. We hardly notice it. We have always lived in the castle.
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Old 01-04-21, 12:50 PM
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I’m the outsdoors type, hunting deep swamps of northern Michigan, fishing (maybe on the ice soon), working on bikes, car repairs, mountain biking...oh man, then there’s the Ram 1500 Hemi. My wife is not a bike rider but loves to camp with me and since our dating days 44 years ago. We do a lot of things together but cycling I go solo, can’t even find a riding partner.
I don’t everyday ride but will if the weather isn’t clearing soon enough. I will ride in crazy winter weather that makes our smalltown folk think I’m crazy.
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Old 01-04-21, 05:47 PM
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We met at the start of our freshman year at UCLA (September 1968), got married in June 1973, right after she finished her fifth year teacher training, and while I was still in grad school. We could not afford a car for the first few years, so we biked everywhere, but she gradually became increasingly intimidated by traffic. We enjoy walking and hiking together, and she does still like bicycling on trails or dedicated paths, but we have mostly separate fitness routines. I have my weight lifting at the YMCA and bicycling, and she has her ballet lessons.
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Old 01-04-21, 06:11 PM
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Originally Posted by Wildwood View Post
Whatís a soulmate?
Itís the other shoe that youíre still looking for...
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Old 01-04-21, 07:56 PM
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32 years here with my wife (34 total including dating). Total respect for each other and we're definitely best friends. Common interests revolve around family, camping, hiking and huckleberry picking. I love cars and, for her, it's just a mode of transportation. I also love my C&V bikes but my wife hates to ride so I go alone or with friends. In the beginning we agreed we both needed our own thing/hobby and it's worked out great.
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Old 01-04-21, 08:27 PM
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Originally Posted by AdkMtnMonster View Post
It’s the other shoe that you’re still looking for...

?

Not looking for anything. My shoes are on my feet. Still.
I do have dementia and am not a conversationalist.
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Old 01-04-21, 09:01 PM
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She knits, I ride, together we hike. She tried cycling for a while, and I learned to knit. We're happy with our respective hobbies.

She volunteered for rider support at a 1500 km randonneuring brevet once. About three days in, I was riding along in the rando mental state when an SUV pulled up beside me, the window rolled down, and my wife said "Hi, how's it going?" I was like, WTF are you doing in my rando zone? Obviously didn't say that aloud, but my reaction probably did. That headspace takes me hundreds of miles and and some sleep deprivation to get into, and I don't need normal life thoughts shattering that whole construct. She learned I'm not half as crazy as the average randonneur, and also she doesn't care to repeat the experience.

On the knitting front, she's a math major and her knitting projects are not simple. When she's working on some complex chart with multiple needles and colors in play, simultaneously counting stitches and rows and increases or decreases, I shut up and read bf.

If a smart thief ever breaks in the house, they'll skip the bikes and go for the yarn stash.
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Old 01-04-21, 09:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Wildwood View Post
?

Not looking for anything. My shoes are on my feet. Still.
I do have dementia and am not a conversationalist.
ďSoleĒ mate. Other shoe. Got one, need itís mate. Sole mate. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

And, on topic... My wife rides outdoors with me occasionally, and has her bike set up on her trainer next to mine in the Cave.
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Old 01-05-21, 05:58 AM
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31 years married, 35 years together (age 64). We bike and hike together, but did much more biking together years ago. I graduated to liking longer, harder rides and she found a love for running. She also got her girlfriends into biking and they have all moved to shorter/slower rides togethers over the years. Sometimes I'll take them all out to a new spot to ride, and then I'll leave them all behind and do more miles. On driving vacations, we will bring the bikes and do some together and I'll get longer rides in alone.

We have found supported multi-day tours to be something we can enjoy together. Most recently, in 2018 we did a 5 day supported tour of the Finland's Aland Islands with Freewheeling Adventures - it was awesome. Largely flat, I could add miles in when I wanted, she could use the sag services when she wanted.

I did a Cycleblaze writeup on that trip here. If 2021 allows, we will probably do something like that in the US late this year.
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Old 01-05-21, 08:07 AM
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The worst thing that could happen on my bike rides is that my wife would end up doing all the wifey sh:@ at the hospital and maybe later at home during whatever shape my rehab takes. I think about her when I consider increasing risk on a ride. When we have ridden together on the road, my mind regularly drifts to how stupid I am for asking her to go with me. On one path ride, I hit a pine cone, went down, she landed on top of me and in the process, messed up her knee. My wife is a runner. Cycling can get in the way of that. In other words, my wife rarely rides.
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Old 01-05-21, 08:12 AM
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37 years married, been together for 45 years. I'm new to cycling, meaning I rode more regularly, more intensely and further distances in 2020 than ever before. My wife likes a leisurely ride, she's never been very active. So, I ride with her, at her pace about once a week to encourage her to get out, and she likes doing it together. Once in a while she rides with a couple of her friends, and I ride a couple of times a week with my buddies. We enjoy each other's company and like doing things together, but we also enjoy doing our own thing too.
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Old 01-05-21, 08:23 AM
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My wife and I started dating 53 years ago, been married 50 years this summer. She is an avid cyclist, ex-racer, and we ride together and in groups. She knocked out 4,000 miles this year and drops me on climbs due to the fact that she hasn't "matured" weight-wise like I have.

Anyway, she is my wing-person and even more so this year where most of our riding was just the two of us.
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Old 01-05-21, 06:20 PM
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As I'm oftentimes prone to disclose in this fashion, I met my wife in a dark parking lot -- at a car cruise-in. She had her Mustang ('70 Mach 1), and I had my Cougars. What sealed the deal in Sept '85 was when I bought my brand new T-bird Turbo Coupe... We talked for a while, went for 'breakfast' at Denny's as the cruise started to die.. and came back to the parking lot... In the interim, we had been making a 'list' (trying to 'out-kink'/or out-bluff the other), and one of the items was a 'cheap plastic hand puppet' (not gonna say what else was on that list ). As we're standing around after the cruise (everyone had left by then), one of the guys drove by through the parking lot with a Bob's Big Boy hand puppet on his antenna... The two of us looked at each other and laughed out loud... Kismet, Karma, or whatever you want to call it, but we've been married for 34+ years now!...

BUT she hasn't ridden a bike since she was 12 or so... so NOT my 'wingman'!
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Old 01-05-21, 06:31 PM
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Originally Posted by AdkMtnMonster View Post
ďSoleĒ mate. Other shoe. Got one, need itís mate. Sole mate. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

...
I thought this was going to be a fish story.
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Old 01-06-21, 07:16 PM
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Met my spouse by both riding bikes to work at an Indiana hospital 43 years ago. One thing led to another........... We still ride together very frequently, especially during Covid times, when the club rides we are used to participating in are not happening. Spend a lot of time together of late helping sons by providing daycare for one or both of our grandsons. She spends lots of time/energy on quilting and the sewing arts, as they say. I provide support for that, but not participation. I play guitar, after a fashion, which she supports but doesn't participate in. I keep our bikes in shape and she supports that by telling folks that "All I have to do is get on and ride."
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Old 01-07-21, 03:49 PM
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My wife has wings and is an angel!!! While we have different hobbies and enjoy doing things separately, we also enjoy our time together. She doesn’t like to ride solo, but she did ride a tandem with me over a 7 day tour a couple years ago, with zero training. She hikes and I play golf.

But she is one of my biggest riding supporters. In fact, she has been my SAG lady over multiple week long tours including accompanying me on my cross country ride. I’m really, really lucky to have her on the team!
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Old 01-08-21, 09:05 AM
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I landed one that is definitely both, we have virtually the same interests, twisted sense of humor, finish each otherís sentences and canít stand being away from each other.
Doesnít hurt that sheís also damn nice looking and a triathlete. I scored well above my station in life 😄
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Old 01-08-21, 12:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Tomm Willians View Post
I landed one that is definitely both, we have virtually the same interests, twisted sense of humor, finish each otherís sentences and canít stand being away from each other.
Doesnít hurt that sheís also damn nice looking and a triathlete. I scored well above my station in life 😄
know how you feel Cheers dont know where I would be without mine
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Old 01-08-21, 04:35 PM
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We have been married for 51 years last October. She is a gardener and I am NOT. I like jazz she does not. I could go on but I think you get the idea. We love each other and have had our own interests for our entire marriage. Would I like her to come along on my rides, honestly, no. It is my time to be alone and I enjoy it and I believe she is happy doing her thing. That said I know she has tried to get my into her garden stuff but I limit it to lawn work, digging holes for planting, mulch but the day to day is on her.
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Old 01-18-21, 08:52 AM
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My wife, JoLynn is my Wing Man and the best riding buddy I've ever had, that includes while we where members of a couple of different bike clubs over the years! She's a very slow but steady rider, she can ride all day but I have to wait for her at the top of hills and steep grades, we have a system if I get to far ahead and I always wait at corners to make sure she's still there. It's worked well for us since 1984 when I bought her, her first multi-speed bicycle we hope to keep riding into the sunset for quite a few years!!
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Old 01-18-21, 09:08 PM
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Originally Posted by bjjoondo View Post
My wife, JoLynn is my Wing Man and the best riding buddy I've ever had, that includes while we where members of a couple of different bike clubs over the years! She's a very slow but steady rider, she can ride all day but I have to wait for her at the top of hills and steep grades, we have a system if I get to far ahead and I always wait at corners to make sure she's still there. It's worked well for us since 1984 when I bought her, her first multi-speed bicycle we hope to keep riding into the sunset for quite a few years!!
Who does the tire changes?
You're very lucky.
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