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John E 05-13-08 07:46 AM

What does your bicycle say about you?
Forbes has run a series of articles on "what your car says about you" and "what your car selection says to the opposite sex." It then talks about target demographics and markets for everything from Dodge Vipers to minivans, Bentleys, and Audi RS4s. Could/should we try to assemble a similar gallery for bicycle ownership? Of course, we'll have to factor in the N+1 rule ... :)

Stevie47 05-13-08 07:53 AM

The best one I read about what a car says about you was: Owning a Volvo says...."I'm afraid of my wife".

For you Volvo owners, it's a joke:)

Now back to the OP's thread

maddmaxx 05-13-08 07:54 AM

Tell Forbes that I don't care. That will send them into a financial tizzy.

Terrierman 05-13-08 07:58 AM

I'm not sure, but I suspect it isn't kind.

SKYLAB 05-13-08 08:22 AM

My bikes all say the same thing about me : he loves us!

Timtruro 05-13-08 08:26 AM

They all say " he loves to ride"

Garfield Cat 05-13-08 08:27 AM

It would be more interesting when the bike and the cars are matched up, but not bikes alone.

Jet Travis 05-13-08 08:29 AM

My bikes say: Rust never sleeps.

oilman_15106 05-13-08 08:31 AM

Both Forbes and the Wall St. Journal have been covering the bicycle industry pretty well over the last year or so. Forbes had a article about Scott Bicycles which was pretty interesting. What does that say about me that I like bicycles and subscribe to both publications?

Boudicca 05-13-08 08:50 AM

Mine says "You're a wimp." Why else would I have a triple on a titanium bike?

But I'm a bling-loving wimp.

Or is that a win-loving blimp?

cccorlew 05-13-08 10:08 AM

My bikes say the following:
Cannondale Mountain Bike converted to skinny tire commuter:
"This guy is either homeless, has a DUI, or is some weird health nut who rides in the rain"
What I wish it said: "What a great guy! Saving the planet and staying in shape that the same time."

My Kestrel RT700:
Another 50+ dude on a great carbon bike he'll never fully tap the potential of. He should lose a few pounds and quite thinking about the bike."
What I'd like it to say:
"Wow, who is that amazing fast guy on that rolling piece of art? What a stud. He must be at least 30 years old."

Feathers 05-13-08 10:11 AM

mine says, "the rider of this bicycle is tres cool!"

Artkansas 05-13-08 10:27 AM

Mine don't say anything. Bicycles can't speak.

What my bicycles represent to the other sex?

He's not a couch potato, but if he doesn't have a car, then he's either too cheap to spend money on me or a loser who lost his license or can't afford a car.

BluesDawg 05-13-08 10:38 AM

I don't know what they say to other people but to me they say "let's go ride".

Tom Bombadil 05-13-08 10:40 AM

Why, oh Why me?

solveg 05-13-08 10:44 AM

Apparently, according to the guys in the road forum, my bike says that my car is a Subaru or Volvo, and my computer is a Macintosh. Both true.

fthomas 05-13-08 11:25 AM

To the Carbon Crowd here in S. Cal my bike says: He really is a Fred
To the people driving cars on the road: Oh great, another cyclist slowing me down.

cccorlew 05-13-08 11:31 AM


Originally Posted by solveg (Post 6686711)
Apparently, according to the guys in the road forum, my bike says that my car is a Subaru or Volvo, and my computer is a Macintosh. Both true.

Hummm. My car is a Subaru, and my computer a Mac. Does that match my bikes?

solveg 05-13-08 11:34 AM


Originally Posted by cccorlew (Post 6687009)
Hummm. My car is a Subaru, and my computer a Mac. Does that match my bikes?

You'll have to ask the road guys. Personally, I'd say no. I think the Rivendell is the third part of the trifecta of what they consider to be "Practical Cult Member".

10 Wheels 05-13-08 11:46 AM

My bikes: 83 Nishiki Sport and 2006 Felt-F-80 Road Bike.
What car do I drive?

solveg 05-13-08 11:52 AM


Originally Posted by 10 Wheels (Post 6687110)
My bikes: 83 Nishiki Sport and 2006 Felt-F-80 Road Bike.
What car do I drive?

I don't know! The theory is some kind of Roadie Juju! I'd send you the link, but the thread is about 148 pages long....

Jet Travis 05-13-08 12:19 PM


Originally Posted by cccorlew (Post 6687009)
Hummm. My car is a Subaru, and my computer a Mac. Does that match my bikes?

What your car says about you

Acura Integra - I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars

Acura NSX - I am impotent

Audi 90 - I enjoy putting out engine fires

Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Eldorado - I am a very good Mary Kay salesman

Cadillac Seville - I am a pimp

Chevrolet Camaro - I enjoy beating the hell out of people

Chevrolet Chevette - I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette

Chevrolet Corvette - I'm in a mid-life crisis

Chevrolet Cavalier - Absolute LEGEND!

Chevrolet El Camino - I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

Chrysler Cordoba - I dig the rich Corinthian leather

Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Dodge Dart - I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

Dodge Daytona - I delivered pizza for four years to get this car

Ferrari Testarossa - I am known to prematurely ejaculate

Ford Explorer - I will not be caught dead in a mini van

Ford Fairmont - (See Dodge Dart)

Ford Mustang - I cant afford a Camaro

Ford Crown Victoria - I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them.

Geo Storm - I will start the 11th grade in the fall.

Geo Tracker - I will start the 12th grade in the fall.

Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all

Honda Civic - I have just graduated and have no credit

Honda Accord - I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.

Infiniti Q45 - I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.

Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports.

Jaguar XJ6 - I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year.

Kia Sephia - I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu Corp.

Lamborghini Countach - I only have one testicle

Lincoln Town Car - I live for bingo and covered dish suppers

Mercury Grand Marquis - (See above)

Mercedes 500SL - I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mercedes 560SEL - I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler

MGB - I am dating a mechanic

Mitsubishi Diamante - I don't know what it means either

Nissan 300ZX - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.

Oldsmobile Cutlass - I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Peugeot 505 Diesel - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List

Plymouth Neon - I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena

Pontiac Trans AM - I just cant get it right

Porsche 911 Turbo - I have a three inch penis.

Porsche 944 - I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanon is a tad bit too liberal

Saturn SC2 - (See Honda Civic)

Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu

Toyota Camry - I am still in the closet

Volkswagon Beetle - I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagon Cabriolet - I am out of the closet

Volkswagon Microbus - I am tripping right now

Volvo 740 Wagon - I am frightened of my wife

alanfleisig 05-13-08 12:54 PM

My bike says I'm a middle-aged, above middle-income bike shop owner's dream come true.

But too cheap for a true custom bike.

(07 Madone 5.2 w/Kysyrium ES, Deda bars and stem, Selle Italia saddle, Speedplay pedals and Obama 08 stickers covering up the Disco logos.)

(Oh, and like HRC, I have one testicle to spare.)

[email protected] 05-13-08 12:56 PM

My bikes don't talk, and neither do my cars. One of my cars made the list above ('97 Miata), the other one didn't (Honda Insight Hybrid). Thought for sure the Prius would make the list though . . .

Prius: You really wanted an Insight, but got tired of waiting for Honda to make more!

Just kidding.

Rick / OCRR

Little Darwin 05-13-08 01:06 PM

What all of my bikes say about me:

I really wish that lard @$$ would lose some weight!!!

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