A few older jokes I enjoyed
12-17-08, 06:46 AM
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A few older jokes I enjoyed
I've sure gotten old.! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't
hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications
that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with
dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my driver's license.
THE SENILITY PRAYER : Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked
anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the
difference.
You know it’s a cold day when your teeth start chattering and they’re still on the
nightstand. Maxine
Three old guys are out walking.
First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"
Second one says, "No, its Thursday!"
Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."
Hope you enjoyed them also.
new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't
hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications
that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with
dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my driver's license.
THE SENILITY PRAYER : Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked
anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the
difference.
You know it’s a cold day when your teeth start chattering and they’re still on the
nightstand. Maxine
Three old guys are out walking.
First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"
Second one says, "No, its Thursday!"
Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."
Hope you enjoyed them also.
Last edited by Closed Office; 12-17-08 at 06:57 AM.
12-17-08, 01:13 PM
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Not an "old guy" one, but:
Q: How many people with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Hey, let's go get a pizza!
SP
...and yes I am ADHD.
"People say I have ADHD, but they just don't underst... Hey! Look! A chicken!"
12-17-08, 03:24 PM
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[QUOTE=bobbycorno;8037124Q: How many people with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Hey, let's go get a pizza!
SP
...and yes I am ADHD.
"People say I have ADHD, but they just don't underst... Hey! Look! A chicken!"
[/QUOTE]
Back in the old days before it had a name, my Mom was a psychology major at the local University and she had her own name for it, "Rabbit Mind". A great description that related to the speed of thought and the apparent instantaneous leaps of thought.
What baffled her though was how my brother and I would talk. We could converse, but no one else could follow the conversation for all its zig zags. But we didn't notice. It was no problem tracking the flow as long as you knew the 10 thoughts that happened between sentences.
A: Hey, let's go get a pizza!
SP
...and yes I am ADHD.
"People say I have ADHD, but they just don't underst... Hey! Look! A chicken!"
[/QUOTE]Back in the old days before it had a name, my Mom was a psychology major at the local University and she had her own name for it, "Rabbit Mind". A great description that related to the speed of thought and the apparent instantaneous leaps of thought.
What baffled her though was how my brother and I would talk. We could converse, but no one else could follow the conversation for all its zig zags. But we didn't notice. It was no problem tracking the flow as long as you knew the 10 thoughts that happened between sentences.
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